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Dating a single mom issue. Advice please?

arborealarboreal PExer
I’m in a relationship with a single mom. she lives with her mom and daughter. She’s 28. May dalwa syang kapatid pero may kanya kanya na silang buhay. Niyayaya ko na syang maglive in kami pero eto yung pinakamasakit na part, hindi nya maibigay sakin na magsama na kami. Oftentimes we argue dahil hindi  ko alam kung sino ba talaga ang hindi makaintindi samin dalwa, kung sino ang mas nagtitiis sa amin. Minsan di ko na maintindihan kung part ba ako ng priorities nya. Parang kahit wala kasi ako, kumpleto na buhay nya kasi may anak na sya. Akala nya hindi ko iniintindi na may anak at nanay syang binubuhay. I am 31 years old. Ang kinasasama lang ng loob ko bakit hindi nya ako maintindihan na nasa stage din naman na ako ng pagsesettle down pero ang dapat ko pa rin isipin ay yung side nya. Nangangarap din naman ako magkaron ng bubuuing pamilya kasama sana sya. Lagi nyang sinasabi na bigyan ko pa sya ng time pero hanggang kailan? Hindi ko alam kung naiintindigan ba nya na wala pa akong anak Para itulad nya ako sa situation nya. Any thoughts mga single parents jan? Gusto ko pa rin syang intindihin kahit nahihirapan na ako. Any advice?

Comments

  • ABUCHIKEKABUCHIKEK PEx Rookie ⭐
    never date a single mom!


  • ABUCHIKEKABUCHIKEK PEx Rookie ⭐
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdzLfiLCkrc

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vw4TFw7eKyE
  • ABUCHIKEKABUCHIKEK PEx Rookie ⭐
    edited August 30
    kung nakakapanood ka ng mga tulfo, karamihan duon ay kung paano sinisira ng mga single mother ang mga kinakasama nila, at yan ba ang gusto mo mag alaga ng anak ng ibang lalake, tira tira ang gusto mo? nakakadireng beta male ka! kung baga isa kang "cuck"...

    remember

    you've been warned brother
  • IronHandofJusticeIronHandofJustice Member PEx Guru 🎖️🎖️
    edited August 30
    Anong sabi ng mama niya TS? Or hindi mo pa nakausap?

    Iyong post mo kasi, full of emotional add-ons, walang relevant details like:
    1. Parental and siblings consent. Approve ba sila sayo?
    2. Financial status niyo dalawa, stable careers? Insurance? Emergency fund? Rent or buy? May pangdownpayment if bibili?
    3. Gaano kalayo ang titirahan niyo duon sa bahay nila? 
    4. Nag aaral na ba ang bata? If yes, does she need to transfer into another school since they'll be moving out? If not, sino ang maghahatid sa bata or bantay sa school?
    5. If you guys will settle down and nabuntis mo siya (which is most likely gonna happen), is she willing to give up her job? If not, sino ang mag aalaga sa existing at iyong sa inyo?

    I hope may sagot or at least plans ka na sa mga sitwasyon na ito, otherwise YOU ARE NOT READY. 

  • IronHandofJustice

    Hi sir! Salamat po sa reply. Btw, kaya ko naman na pong buhayin silang mag ina. May maliit naman po akong negosyo at sya naman po may trabaho. Financially stable naman po ako. Willing naman din ako magrelocate malapit sa kanila. Nag aaral na rin po ang anak nya. Sorry po hindi ko lang naibigay lahat ng details pero what i meant po sa pagsesettle down is handang handa na po ako sa lahat lahat pati sa responsibilities sa kanilang mag ina. Napag usapan na rin po namin yun. Ok naman din po sa family nya pero may minor problem lng sya sa ate nya pero di naman po ako nakikialam sa away nlang magkapatid. Ang di ko lang maintindhan kung ano pa bang kulang saken? Parang nasasagad na kasi ako sa pagtitiis. Parang di naman na nya ko kailangan at hindi nya maintindhan ung punto ko na kailangan ko rin sya. Gusto ko lang din makarinig ng point of view ng mga single mom dito bakit ba ganun ung iba mag isip sa inyo?


    Btw salamat po ulit sa mga reply nyo

  • ABUCHIKEK

    Alam ko naman ung consequences bro. Alam ko rin yung pinasok ko. 
  • ABUCHIKEKABUCHIKEK PEx Rookie ⭐
    "simp" "simp" "simp"
  • rockenrollangrockenrollang EZRALites / EZRAberks PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    single mom na hiwalay at kasal or single mom na nabuntisan lang ganun ba?

    kung kasal mahirap yan sir, kung hindi naman kausapin mo lang maigi sir basta maayos intention mo later on
    magiging maayos kahihitnatnat niyo
  • metmetmethmetmetmeth PEx Rookie ⭐
    siguro kaya sya hesitant bakit hindi kasal ang inalok mo bakit kailangan mag live in pa kayo? kaya ba live in dahil gusto mo lang muna itry kung magwowork? syempre hesitant din sya dahil kung live in lang anytime pwede kayo maghiwalay. ifafactor nya din syempre yung anak nya. yung emotion nung bata kasi syempre kung maghihiwalay kayo maguguluhan nanaman yung bata sa sitwasyon na bakit bigla hindi kayo magkasama sa bahay in case maghiwalay kayo. syempre single mom yan uunahin nya yung anak nya kahit ano pang sitwasyon ayon ang number 1 priority. 
  • DacsDacs Bummed bу Αdmin PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    arboreal said:
    I’m in a relationship with a single mom. she lives with her mom and daughter. She’s 28. May dalwa syang kapatid pero may kanya kanya na silang buhay. Niyayaya ko na syang maglive in kami pero eto yung pinakamasakit na part, hindi nya maibigay sakin na magsama na kami. Oftentimes we argue dahil hindi  ko alam kung sino ba talaga ang hindi makaintindi samin dalwa, kung sino ang mas nagtitiis sa amin. Minsan di ko na maintindihan kung part ba ako ng priorities nya. Parang kahit wala kasi ako, kumpleto na buhay nya kasi may anak na sya. Akala nya hindi ko iniintindi na may anak at nanay syang binubuhay. I am 31 years old. Ang kinasasama lang ng loob ko bakit hindi nya ako maintindihan na nasa stage din naman na ako ng pagsesettle down pero ang dapat ko pa rin isipin ay yung side nya. Nangangarap din naman ako magkaron ng bubuuing pamilya kasama sana sya. Lagi nyang sinasabi na bigyan ko pa sya ng time pero hanggang kailan? Hindi ko alam kung naiintindigan ba nya na wala pa akong anak Para itulad nya ako sa situation nya. Any thoughts mga single parents jan? Gusto ko pa rin syang intindihin kahit nahihirapan na ako. Any advice?

    Kasal ang ialok mo kung desidido ka na sa kanya.
  • Thank you po ulit sa mga reply and advices nyo po. Single mom sya na nagkaron ng baby. Ung nakabuntis sa kanya ay bumalik sa dating gf nya na naanakan nya rin. 
    Inalok ko na sya ng kasal dati.. pero sa ngayon hindi pa rin sya ready kaya po pakikipag live in muna ang inaask ko sa kanya. Hindi ko alam kung paano mag isip at kung ano bang tumatakbo sa isip ng mga single parent.. totoo ang hirap pag nandun ka na sa sitwasyon. Lagi naman nyang sinasabi na mahal na mahal nya ko pero sabi ko sa knya hindi naman pwedeng mahal lang namin ang isat isa. Kailangan ko rin naman sya. Parang sa anak at nanay na lang nya kasi nagrerevolve mundo nya. Minsan hinahanap ko rin naman ung security ko sa kanya. Ayoko syang igive up kahit mahirap. 
  • it seems u really love this single mom. if you love her, then you will wait until she's ready. and yes, sa mga sinabi nila dito, her priority will always be the kid. NO MATTER WHAT. tipong may sakit ka pero may sakit din ang anak nya, yung anak nya ang sasamahan nya. ganon kasimple yon. sabi mo alam mo ang pinasok mo.. so dapat alam mong ang oras nya nasa anak nya. im pretty sure she has her reasons bat hindi pwedeng mag live in kayo sa ngayon. again, simple lang yan, if mahal mo.. antayin mo. tanggapin mo lahat. pero kung ayaw mo na ng situation at naaawa ka sa sarili mo dahil feeling mo, hindi ka nya mahal coz of the situation, then get out and never date a single mom again.
  • Sir stabilo.. Thank you very much sir sa advice. I highly appreciate it po. 
  • DemixlDemixl PEx Rookie ⭐
    Dude, hope she is smart and worth it. I started to meet once with one, but failed. I met with two, and the other one was smart and beautiful, but we had problems with her ex husband.
  • John.Good.TalkerJohn.Good.Talker Good Talks PEx Rookie ⭐
    edited October 1
    Single moms or maried but living separately moms, both comes with a package. 

    It's good that you're willing to take the responsibility and be a partner to a broken woman. Yung importante is kayong dalawa nagkakasundo, you respect her and her kid. Next comes the parent, our culture dictates us to look after our parents and our parents would expect us to look after them. If she is taking on this responsibility, then you my friend have found a wonderful woman. Your job is to show your support, show the parent(s) that you are not going to come in between instead give your helping hand. The siblings, if you think her kapatid has issues with you then you can settle that with her. You don't need her approval anyway, but confronting her what her issues are will help you understand the big Y. 

    Ultimately, you two are adults. Women empowerment is one of the major changes is today's generation. They can make their own decision, can be independent, can drive, can order and can be the boss. It is not too often that women wants to be 'subdued' (I quote that because some men would still think they can control women) or 'be controlled', in fact a lot of women nowadays wants to be single to avoid being hurt (in general). And men nowadays wants their partner to be happy that means even holding their purses or handbags.

    cheers!
  • NilsNils Hunter PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    It sounds like she's been surviving if not thriving before you entered the picture. If that is true, mahirap mong mahikayat yan na mag-settle down with you especially kung yung pinagdaanan nya before she got to that stage eh napakahirap. Until she feels the need to have a man in her life, she probably wouldn't choose to rock her boat and put herself and her child in a situation that won't work out and worse, could blow up in their faces. 
    Only thing you can do is wait for her to realize she NEEDS you in her life. If you can't handle that you and your relationship with her isn't her top priorities, then sad to say, you should look for a different partner if settling down is your goal.
  • ach_chooach_choo Repent you savages! Repent! PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    edited November 12
    Yeah, been in a relationship with one. She was a scheming, blood-sucking leech. But she was irresistible. :angry:

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