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Common Dilemma of a person whose been cheated.

Hello po Good day sa mga readers and members. Thank you for posting admin may God bless us all. My story just happened recently. Talagang naman until now ninanamnam ko pa din yun sakit. I was an ex abroad. I've been working in a muslim country for the past 6 years. Umalis ako at iniwan ang mag aama ko ng  punung puno ng pag asa. My eldest son is just 5 years old  and yun bunso ko was only 3.My first two years was an, adjustment period. Nun nakaadust na ko bigla naman nagkagyera. Hindi na na ipapadala yun mga salary namin. Until naipon ng naipon. I signed another contract to complete the, four years at nagpapart time ako para, may maipadala sa kanila. Very stressful ang naging buhay ko. My hubby suggested na umuwi na lang ako at iwanan na lang yun sweldo ko. So he went to qatar. Unfortunately hindi sya nakatagal and he can't manage his homesickness. Sa madaling salita hindi nya natapos ang contract at umuwi din sya. Again I was left behind the war and hoping na makukuha or maipapadala yun pera ko sa banko.Because that's the only reason why im holding back and choosing not to go home. Pansimula sana namin yun pera na yun. When he left qatar napansin ko na ang coldness nya. We had some fights even before. Pera ang issues madalas dahil talaga naman nagstruggle ako magprovide dahil sa sitwasyon. Pati na din sa mga nakikita nya na kachats ko. But I swear, I never been intimate to anyone kahit nakikipagchat ako. So this year april it's been 6 years nakahanap na ako ng bagong hospital na may full remittance. Biglang na icu yun tatay ko. So nag ask sa hospital namin ng emergency leave. And thank God pinayagan nila. I was reunited with my family after 6 years. Very happy nakita ko na mga anak ko at si hubby. Bago ko ulit bumalik somebody just whispered to my ears. Na may kabit c hubby for almost 3yrs. They were even caught doing dirty chats by my inlaws sa phone ng anak ko. So what did they do they confront the girl. The girl was actually married and living with his hubby and kid. They're from a very far province in north. Pero third cousin sya ni hubby. So her kin were from our place. She traveled that far and making excuses to her hubby para makauwi sa lugar namin just to meet my husband. I confronted her and telling her na pera na, pinagpapakamatayan ko sa abroad ang ginagastos nila. Pero binigyan nya ko ng assurance na sya ang gumagastos mula pamasahe gang sa hotel nila. She even pampered my husband sa mga mamahalin gift. At yun pera ginagastos nya ay pera ng asawa nya. Very anxious ako nun nalaman ko. I started ranting the girl sa fb. Pero di ko naman totally inexposed ang identity. Pero un mga malalapit at nakakakilala alam nila. Yun husband nya since pareho kaming victim he kept on asking na ayusin na lang yun problema at magpatawaran. But I do believe he's trying to be good para, isave un reputation nya. Also I know something was on his mind. He's rich and he has money he can do whatever he want sa asawa ko.
Even though he promised me that he'll not gonna do anything bad para sa considerations para sa mga bata. My issues now is hirap na hirap ako I accept un nangyari. I know its common. Nangyayari na halos sa lahat ng ldr. Pero iba pala kapag ikaw na yun nasa sitwasyon. Nun hindi ko sya maiout I've been suicidal. Iba, kasi yun pakiramdam na binigay mo na lahat sa kanila wala ka ng itinira still niloko ka pa. Ako ang nagtataguyod sa pamilya namin eversince. Naiintindihan ko may pangangailangan sya. But 3yrs is 3yrs nakipagcommit pa din sya. Hindi ako naniniwala na walang love or affection sya na ibinigay sa babae. He was telling me na ang alam ni girl we are in a rough relationship. Hindi naoopen ni girl ang phone nya.Nakahide ang mga post nya sa girl kapag related sakin. At sinasabi nya eventhough wlang nakikita si girl tinanggap na lang din ni girl kahit wala syang pinanghahawakan na kahit ano. Masarap kasi ang bawal at alam ko si girl ang nahulog ng husto. Dahil nun kinonfront ko sya para isampal sa muka nya lahat ng inamin ng asawa ko tungkol sa kanya sa asawa ko pa sya nagwoworry.And she cried knowing na hindi sya, pinaglaban at dinurog sya, ng husto ng asawa ko sa, akin just to save his *****. Sinabi ng asawa ko na tumagal sila dahil ginusto nya na may napaparausan sya na hindi nya kailangan gumastos. May naikakama sya na alam nya na wlang sakit at higit sa lahat sya ang ginagastusan. I don't know but I am not convinced. Though I've seen all the efforts were coming from the girl. Hindi din naman abswelto ang asawa ko dahil niloko padin nya ko at nanggamit sya ng tao kung totoo nga, na walang feelings. 
At this moment we're trying to patch up. Nagresign ako at dina bumalik sa, abroad. It's been almost a month nun malaman ko. Hirap na hirap pa din ako magcope. Hindi ko alam kung papano ko sisimulan or kakalimutan lahat. Ayoko ng maging miserable. Gusto ko makalimot ayoko malugmok sa paulit ulit na sakit kapag bumabalik sakin yun ginawa nila. Gusto ko makita yun babae in person dhil through phone lang kami nagkakausap dahil na din sa pkiusap ng asawa nya na niloko din nya. Gusto ko itanong sa kanya kung bakit may asawa, na sya sa tabi nya nagpapakamot pa sya sa, asawa ko. Bakit nya pinaglalaban yun asawa ko na wala naman ibinigay na kahit na anong assurance sa kanya. Gusto ko magkaroon ng closure sa kanya. Masampal man lng at ng maramdaman nya kung gaano kasakit yun ginawa nya. But at the back of my mind iniisip ko. I know she might be suffering now sa mismong asawa nya. She might be living in hell. Inapakan nya ng husto yun asawa nya for 3 long years. For now ang problema ko talaga hirap ako makalimot may time na halos kahit hawak ayoko magpahawak sa asawa ko. Parang naiisip ko yun kababuyan nila. Hindi ko alam kung papano even though I kept on praying kapag panic attack nako. Parang di ako narerelieve. Gusto kong magpatawad kasi baka sa ganun way ako magkaroon ng peace of mind pero ang hirap.
I want to seek advise from those who have been in this kind of situation. Kung papano ba ako makakalimot at makakapagpatawad. Kung pano ko magkakaroon ng katahimikan. Dahil sa totoo lang I'm literally becoming sick dahil sa, galit na dala dala ko sa puso ko. Hindi din ako masaya kahit kasama ko pa yun asawa ko. Still there's something wrong.I don't know how, to figure out. So im seeking advices. Thanks, a lot for reading. God bless us all.

Comments

  • panis_na_putopanis_na_puto Member PExer
    Hiwalayan mo na ang iyong asawa. Ang taksil ay kailan man magiging taksil!
  • zirtamlazirtamla I Contact PEx Rookie ⭐
    Girl, do not seek advice here. Marami dito mema lang at wala naman pakialam sa magiging consequences ng decision mo. Try to talk to a therapist or someone close to you who really understands your situation. In the end, nasa sayo pa din ang desisyon. Pag isipan mong maigi kung ano ang talagang makakabuti para sayo.
  • Desert_DolphinDesert_Dolphin PEx Rookie ⭐
    Accept the fact that you will never forget this and you will never forgive your husband totally.

    Find someone to talk with. Ilabas mo lahat ng galit mo at iiyak mo. Karapatan mo yan. But do not force yourself to forgive him. Time wil tell kung kelan mo sya mapapatawad.

    Wag mo na subukang kausapin yung other woman. Baka magkagulo pa lalo.

    You have been wronged. There is injustice here. You want both of them punished one way or another. But apparently, the other woman's husband knows about it, so surely, this woman's married life is a mess right now. Settle on that at least.

    Focus on your children. Whatever decision you make, try to insulate them from this problem.

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