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A writing exercise: Show don't tell

From https://buwayahman.wordpress.com/2018/01/27/writing-exercise-show-dont-tell/

Show, don't tell. That's the advice of AA Patawaran in his book "Write Here Write Now," a book that I would strongly recommend if you need inspiration or motivation to write.
What Patawaran meant was to describe a scene as if you were a spectator. Unlike the "first person point-of-view" where the narrator is describing events from his perspective and thus can inject his own feelings and emotions, and unlike the "omniscient third-person" where the narrator has access to everybody's thoughts and perspectives, the "third-person spectator" (as I would like to call it) does not have access to any of the character's thoughts or perspectives. The author is narrating a scene as if the reader was watching it. Whatever are thoughts and feelings of the characters, the writer has to reveal through the character's actions. You can't say that a character is scared. You have to describe that fear through what the character is doing or how the character appears. So instead of simply saying that a character is scared, you describe that the character is "trembling, drenched in cold sweat, the hair standing on his arms."
As I am known for writing about sex, I wondered if I could apply this technique to the sex act. Can I adequately describe passion? Can I articulate a man's horniness? Can I describe a female orgasm beyond the character screaming "I'm coming?"
Actually, I have already hammered out a 1,000-word sex scene using this technique. I will post it in a few days. Based on that experience, you really have to imagine the scene as if it were unfolding in front of you and resist the temptation of diving into the character's inner thoughts.
 Give it a try!


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