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on love, textmates, and virtual romances...

hey there people!!! ;)

I've got this dilemma...

I have a boyfriend of four years and it's going along quite well... that is, until a friend gave my number to this guy, and we became textmates....

It all started innocently enough... with how are you's and how's it going's... and then the messages became mushier... then, he turned all serious on me...

And believe it or not... my neat, idyllic little love life has turned topsy turvy as I start to question myself "Am I falling for this guy?"... and the truth hit me... maybe I am...

We now text each other 24/7 and he calls everyday... we've exchanged pics over the net and we're planning to meet up soon...

So, after my endless ramblings, I'd like to ask you, people... is this type of thing... "romance" if you please, entirely possible?...

HELP!!!
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Comments

  • First off, kawawa naman boyfriend mo.

    Secondly, I wouldn't put too much faith in 'virtual' relationships.
  • hey raven...

    I know... I'm feeling a bit guilty about this... but I can't help feeling that I need something new...

    Man, I'm going nuts!!! :(

    We're actually planning tomeet up tomorrow... I think I'll reserve judgement til we meet...
  • tama si raven..
    fours yrs na kayo together... and you're letting tit slip away with flirt sessions over text? sa tingin ko.. kailangan lang spice sa love life niyo ng bf mo.. kaya ka ganyan...i mean geez... no offence.. but how can anything be "romantic" if you hvaent even me tthe person in real life yet?. no offence ha?
  • well i wouldn't say "sayang naman 4 years mo with your boyfriend." as the song goes.. "its not how long we held each other tight..." hehe :)

    however, i agree with them when they say "you're banking on too much with this "cyber guy". basta advice ko, ingat ingat ka lang. think it through. do what you believe is right.

    last thing... i think you're on the brink of cheating on boyfriend. don't sweet lemon the situation man. face it.

    good luck :)
  • Originally posted by bioman_15
    tama si raven..
    fours yrs na kayo together... and you're letting tit slip away with flirt sessions over text? sa tingin ko.. kailangan lang spice sa love life niyo ng bf mo.. kaya ka ganyan...i mean geez... no offence.. but how can anything be "romantic" if you hvaent even me tthe person in real life yet?. no offence ha?

    Yeah I know... all this is too crazy and too new...

    But... still I have this nagging feeling, intuition if you may... about this guy....

    Aaaaaaaaarrrrrgggghhh!

    I really am hopeless, aren't I? :bawling:
  • Originally posted by Saikee
    well i wouldn't say "sayang naman 4 years mo with your boyfriend." as the song goes.. "its not how long we held each other tight..." hehe :)

    however, i agree with them when they say "you're banking on too much with this "cyber guy". basta advice ko, ingat ingat ka lang. think it through. do what you believe is right.

    last thing... i think you're on the brink of cheating on boyfriend. don't sweet lemon the situation man. face it.

    good luck :)

    Thanks...

    You know, my boyfriend hasn't changed much... I think it's me who did the changing and I kinda outgrew him na... at least that's what my friends say... Kase he became my Bf when I was just 14, and now I'm 19 and I wanna party and live the life... but he isn't into that kind of thing... He's more the serious, business-oriented type (He's 4 years older than me, by the way)...

    That's probably why I've got this "thing" for this other guy... *sigh*
  • no you arent hopeless.. kasi lahat naman tayo.. we go through that path sometimes.. shempre you're only human.. and you get tempted.. bastat you pick a good choice with a favourable outcome. isipin mo.. 4 yrs kayo mga kasama.. tapos txxt mate guy could last only 4 weeks.. eh then it will all be in vain diba?... basta.. i know your confused.. so u should trust ytou heart and nto your mind.. kasi your heart will never be confused.. only your mind can be...
  • Originally posted by bioman_15
    no you arent hopeless.. kasi lahat naman tayo.. we go through that path sometimes.. shempre you're only human.. and you get tempted.. bastat you pick a good choice with a favourable outcome. isipin mo.. 4 yrs kayo mga kasama.. tapos txxt mate guy could last only 4 weeks.. eh then it will all be in vain diba?... basta.. i know your confused.. so u should trust ytou heart and nto your mind.. kasi your heart will never be confused.. only your mind can be...

    Thanks for the vote of confidence... :)
  • well, I wouldn't expect too much on virtual relationships...

    I have this textmate too - the messages gets mushier and then when we met ... the next is history!

    Wait ka na lang pag nag-meet na kayo... pero kung ako sa'yo dun ka na lang sa boyfriend mo...
  • Originally posted by misty_sky
    Kase he became my Bf when I was just 14, and now I'm 19 and I wanna party and live the life... but he isn't into that kind of thing... He's more the serious, business-oriented type (He's 4 years older than me, by the way)...
    *sigh*

    Another premature 'relationship' veering on the edge of heart break.
  • sorry (out of topic) tulungan niyo naman akos a thread ko calle d"torpe?"... pls
  • Originally posted by femmefatale22
    well, I wouldn't expect too much on virtual relationships...

    I have this textmate too - the messages gets mushier and then when we met ... the next is history!

    Wait ka na lang pag nag-meet na kayo... pero kung ako sa'yo dun ka na lang sa boyfriend mo...

    You met... the next is history?... That sounds ominous...

    Thanks for the advice! :)
  • Originally posted by raven23
    *sigh*

    Another premature 'relationship' veering on the edge of heart break.

    You can say that again... :(
  • nothing beats old fashion, eye to eye, hand in hand, lips to lips relationship...

    i agree with the guy/gal who said you just need some spice in your relationship...or perhaps you need space between you two...but then again, i'd still go nurture my thing with my partner of four years!
  • :rolleyes:

    now this is what i think...

    i also experienced this kind of relationship and i think it's a no-no for your txtmate. (unless you don't really love your boyfriend). and one more thing, virtual realationship is nothing but a relationship doomed to failure. it's gonna end sooner than you think.

    hey you barely know the guy personally and so, how could you fall in love with someone you don't even know?

    it's unfair to your boyfriend too..

    but then again, if you don't want this kind of advice, you better have some little time for yourself to reflect what you really want, and need, for that matter..
  • :rolleyes: m pretty sure he'll turn out to be a real jerk
  • You're not in love with this guy. You're in love with the IDEA of him. As Ellaesq said, "how could you fall in love with someone you don't even know?" E-mail, text messages, pictures don't say MUCH about a person. That may all be a front. There's nothing like knowing someone face-to-face and hanging out with them to get to know them.

    Virtual relationships are just that...virtual. They're not real. Maybe you're just bored with your 4-year relationship. Why don't you spice it up before meeting up with this virtual guy? If it doesn't work...well...assess your relationship with your boyfriend. Don't break up with him just because of virtual guy. There has to be a more valid/a fairer reason than that.

    Don't act on impulse on this one. Do you really want to risk your 4-year relationship for someone you don't even know at all? Be fair. Think about it well before doing anything stupid. I can give you all the cliches in the world to stop you from meeting virtual guy, but it IS ultimately your next step.

    So what ARE you gonna do? :rolleyes:
  • Originally posted by solace
    You're not in love with this guy. You're in love with the IDEA of him. As Ellaesq said, "how could you fall in love with someone you don't even know?" E-mail, text messages, pictures don't say MUCH about a person. That may all be a front. There's nothing like knowing someone face-to-face and hanging out with them to get to know them.

    Virtual relationships are just that...virtual. They're not real. Maybe you're just bored with your 4-year relationship. Why don't you spice it up before meeting up with this virtual guy? If it doesn't work...well...assess your relationship with your boyfriend. Don't break up with him just because of virtual guy. There has to be a more valid/a fairer reason than that.

    Don't act on impulse on this one. Do you really want to risk your 4-year relationship for someone you don't even know at all? Be fair. Think about it well before doing anything stupid. I can give you all the cliches in the world to stop you from meeting virtual guy, but it IS ultimately your next step.

    So what ARE you gonna do? :rolleyes:

    im like, the last person to believe in virtual romances. i believe that you cant really fall for someone without physical presence.

    well said. its all an illusion. youve drawn up the perfect gentleman. once your virtual romance transcends into this superficial world, youd be disappointed. in cases such as this, REGRET IS IMMINENT kasi nga, illusion lang.

    solace, sabi ko sayo di ba impossible? remember?
  • Originally posted by cong


    im like, the last person to believe in virtual romances. i believe that you cant really fall for someone without physical presence.

    well said. its all an illusion. youve drawn up the perfect gentleman. once your virtual romance transcends into this superficial world, youd be disappointed. in cases such as this, REGRET IS IMMINENT kasi nga, illusion lang.

    solace, sabi ko sayo di ba impossible? remember?

    Yes, I remember. It's impossible to fall in love with someone without physical presence.

    As much as possible, avoid emotionally investing in virtual connections. It may be thrilling, but the truth is, that's all it is: thrill. But if you've fallen already, don't let your world revolve around this virtual person. Keep within real relationships as much as you can.

    What's the difference between a psychotic and a neurotic? A psychotic builds castles in the air. A neurotic lives in them.

    Note: I don't know if it's the other way around, but...you get the picture anyway.
  • i agree to both solace and raven23. definitely it is unfair for your bf that you will be seeing someone for just a virtual relationship.

    misty sky you can't resist seeing him can't you?
    even when all these people here are against mr txt guy.
    it's up to you misty sky.

    today you will be seeing him (or you could have seen him) as you are reading this. it will only lead to be more confusing for you if this happens.

    what does it take for you to realize that what you are doing is wrong? what?

    think about it misty sky.
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