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Flirted with someone while in a relationship

Dear PEXers, I need advice. I'm in a 2-year relationship right now. And the excitement has, well, fizzled out. Worse, I haven't really noticed this until I had an "encounter" with someone else.

I messaged this guy friend, whom I met years ago and have not spoken to in a long while. I congratulated him as he recently proposed to his girlfriend.

I don't know what has gotten into me. Maybe because I was bored, maybe I needed to feel excited about something again. One thing led to the other. And the next thing I know, we were having phone s3x.

And what's odd about the whole thing, is that I don't feel guilty. Rather than stifling this thirst for "excitement", I have actually grown hungry for more. Unfortunately, not for my current boyfriend, but for this engaged-guy friend of mine. I don't know if it's the age gap that "excites" me (he's 12 years my senior).

This is just so not me. I don't indulge myself to sexual acts, especially with people other than my boyfriend. This time, I just gave in.

I know all this is wrong. And I know, things between me and my boyfriend will never be the same. But in spite the things that happened and the things I am feeling now, I still wanna keep my boyfriend. He's still the one I wanna marry.

I want our relationship to "sizzle" again. I just don't know how. Please help.
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Comments

  • kleenexlambotkleenexlambot PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    TS, ganun ba yon pag na bo bored ka magiging unfaithful ka?

    Anyway, magsisi ka at sana ay natuto ka sa ginawa mo. Or else, pakamatay ka na lang kaysa naman mag pe pex ka pa sayang lang oras namin.
  • mpugmpug PExer
    I'm not proud. I just thought PEX could be an avenue where I can share what I'm going through. And you guys can help.

    Now that you're actually pointing out the wrongness of the whole thing.. Yes. I am regretful.
  • uzumaki_narutouzumaki_naruto PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    mpug wrote: »
    I don't know what has gotten into me. Maybe because I was bored, maybe I needed to feel excited about something again. One thing led to the other. And the next thing I know, we were having phone s3x.

    you have just opened a door.. you can either enter it or close it..
    mpug wrote: »
    And what's odd about the whole thing, is that I don't feel guilty.

    sometimes, you don't feel the guilt right away.. sometimes, the excitement is so overwhelming you wouldn't hear the guilt already nagging at you.. but it's also because of girls like you that guys find an excuse to cheat and not feel guilty about it..
    mpug wrote: »
    Rather than stifling this thirst for "excitement", I have actually grown hungry for more. Unfortunately, not for my current boyfriend, but for this engaged-guy friend of mine. I don't know if it's the age gap that "excites" me (he's 12 years my senior).

    you can let it out of your system.. you are only excited because you allow yourself to feel the excitement.. probably because being banged by someone 12 years older is a fantasy waiting to happen..
    mpug wrote: »
    This is just so not me. I don't indulge myself to sexual acts, especially with people other than my boyfriend. This time, I just gave in.

    actually, this is just so YOU.. people don't change.. we are what we are, but some things about us just need to be awakened.. and some are better kept in eternal hibernation..
    mpug wrote: »
    I know all this is wrong. And I know, things between me and my boyfriend will never be the same. But in spite the things that happened and the things I am feeling now, I still wanna keep my boyfriend. He's still the one I wanna marry.

    then stop acting single.. you know this is wrong.. act on it..
    mpug wrote: »
    I want our relationship to "sizzle" again. I just don't know how. Please help.

    there are plenty of ways and there are plenty of sources.. just try new things.. i would like to believe you are not suffering from a lack of imagination.. you are already creative enough to imagine yourself being banged over the phone by an engaged man..
  • isa ka rin dito sa mga tao sa pex na masarap barilin sa ulo e :rotflmao:

    iha, ganito gawin mo, makipagbreak ka na sa boyfriend mo. tapos gawin mo na lahat ng gusto mo, concern lang ako sa bf mo kasi sya ang kawawa at pinagsisinungalingan mo. iwan mo na lang sya, mas magandang saktan mo na sya habang maaga pa lang kesa malaman nya sa huli na nakipagsiping ka sa iba.
  • adiposethoughtsadiposethoughts PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    why don't you propose an open relationship with your boyfriend instead so that you won't have to feel guilty and at the same time you are also fair to him?

    at hindi lang ikaw ang nagpapakasasa sa kasiyahan, noh.
  • uzumaki_narutouzumaki_naruto PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    why don't you propose an open relationship with your boyfriend instead so that you won't have to feel guilty and at the same time you are also fair to him?

    at hindi lang ikaw ang nagpapakasasa sa kasiyahan, noh.

    oo nga.. malay mo TS, kalandian na rin pala ng bf mo yung gf ng lalakeng naka-SOP mo.. e di magfoursome na lang kayo, para swapping pa! mas exciting yun!:D
  • adiposethoughtsadiposethoughts PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    excited ka lang sa lolo na yan kasi syempre lahat ng bawal masarap. masyado mo kasing pinagagana ang mga primal instincts mo eh. di ka na nag iisip. nagpapadala ka sa emosyon mo. syempre, mas gusto mo yung mga bagay na hindi mo naeencounter sa current relationship mo.

    kung ako sayo, magsimula kang gumawa ng mga bagay na bawal kasama jowa mo. magnakaw kayo. tumakas kayo. mag absent bigla kayo sa trabaho katapos sumakay lang kayo ng bus going to baguio.

    pumunta kayo ng casino. limasin mo ang pera niya. basta. gumawa ka ng mga bagay na hindi niyo madalas gawin kasi feeling mo mali. PERO DAPAT MAGKASAMA KAYO. WALANG IWANAN.
  • chizmojochizmojo PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    One word to describe you TS - HITAD! :rotfl:
  • adiposethoughtsadiposethoughts PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    oo nga.. malay mo TS, kalandian na rin pala ng bf mo yung gf ng lalakeng naka-SOP mo.. e di magfoursome na lang kayo, para swapping pa! mas exciting yun!:D
    I just wonder what would happen if you get stds in SOPs. hehehhe..

    BF: Honey, how did you get your STD? Had you been unfaithful to me?
    TS: Oh, honey it was an innocent act of lust. I just had an SOP with some random stranger I congratulated online cos he's getting married na. I was bored with our relationship and I was lonely I didn't know what else to do. I just liked the crazy feeling of doing something behind closed doors and the thrill of being caught and all that. I'm sorry you also now have an STD. Please forgive me. I don't love him. I love you. Let's make a family. It's you I wanna marry.
    BF: Tngina mo. You wanna marry me after all this sht? Ulul. You think irerespeto pa kita? Respeto my ass.
  • uzumaki_narutouzumaki_naruto PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    buti na lang SOP is safe s3x.. :lol:
  • adiposethoughtsadiposethoughts PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    buti na lang SOP is safe s3x.. :lol:

    yeah. but there is where it all starts right? you have sex on the phone with someone. then you have sex with your boyfriend thinking it's the guy you're sop-ing with. next thing you know you're in a motmot with the soon to be married guy blowing his talong like both of you were talking about on the phone.

    and then what's next? pregnant ka na cos you didn't use protection? Whahaha!
  • uzumaki_narutouzumaki_naruto PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    sabi nga sa kanta..

    ♫♪ nagsimula sa patikim-tikim! ♪♫
  • darmonxdarmonx PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    ts... get over it... phone sex with a friend doesn't lead into anything.

    so ano.. sa tingin mo yayain ka niya na gawing totohanan... don't hold your breath, he just told you he was getting engaged... do you think he will call that off just to have sex with you?

    and sabihin na natin na bigla ka nga niyang yinaya na totohanin na yung landian niyo? will you be that eager to say Yes let's meet up and screw each others brains out? or will your guilt kick in because you are thinking:
    1. He is ENGAGED to be married!
    2. You are still in a relationship.
    3. You have common friends and they will find out.

    Pupusta ako... hihindi ka rin o sasagot ka lang ng.. pag-iisipan mo... tapos pag kinulit ka niya... matu turn off kana at di mo na bigla siyang papansinin.

    That type of flirting you did with your friend is just natural and hardly follows through because the consequences just processes through your brain like a train wreck waiting to happen.

    don't sweat it. marami akong kalandiang dila lang at kadalasan... hindi ko sila balak seryosohin. Just that thought alone should make you think where you will stand when all is said and done.
  • chizmojochizmojo PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    If only we can send our ano via text/SMS...

    [CROUCHING-TIGER-DISAPPEARING-SPOILER]Pwede pala MMS. :rotfl:[/CROUCHING-TIGER-DISAPPEARING-SPOILER]
  • michymichymoomichymichymoo PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    The answer's simple TS: avoid the guy you're flirting with.

    Re: your current relationship, nasasayo yun kung gusto mo talaga magwork yung relationship. Hindi yan pagkain para kelanganin ng "sizzle", ano tingin mo sa bf mo, sisig?!?
  • Para namang mabubuntis si TS sa phone s3x kung makahusga iba rito. Okay lang yan te , pero learn your boundaries. Tama na yung sa fantasies lang and thru phone. Wag nang mag-dare ng eyeball.

    Yung sa BF mo, maging open ka sa kanya on what you really like. Wag ka matakot. Kung di ka niya maiintindihan now na GF ka pa lang niya eh mamumrublema ka diyan pag naging asawa mo na.
  • ate ganito lang kc yan: sa ngayon hndi pa lantaran *** pakikipag landian mo dun sa guy friend mo. wag mo nlang hintayin na umabot s puntong masisira pagiging friends nyo dahil sa init ng katawan lang.
  • kreukkreuk PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    you're a sex object for the engaged guy and maybe for your bf too to begin with.:hmm:
  • Okay lang na maging s3x object basta nag-eenjoy ka rin at the same time. Whats wrong with fully utilizing what our bodies are capable of. Masyado lang moralista ang lipunan to judge those people who practice the kind of lifestye.
  • kreukkreuk PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    ^ di naman porket sex object ang topic it's a matter of morals. baka akala kasi ng ts may feelings din sa kanya yung engaged guy.
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