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Should I let my girlfriend go off with a rich foreigner? What about our child?

Hi everyone,
My girlfriend called me a few days ago to say that she has been dating this white foreigner that she met online. She is ecstatic because he's very rich and generous with his money. He is happy to be a sugar daddy and Santa Claus (unlike me who is very frugal) which is what she wants. And unlike me, he does not complain about spending money, which is what she likes. (I don't understand why so many desperate white foreigners love to splurge their money and become Santa Claus, isn't that stupid?) She says she is falling in love with him because he's so kind and giving.

She is a good person deep down, but she comes from a very poor family that needs money for food and school for her sisters. The thing is, I'm sort of a hippie who is nonmaterialistic and lives a nonmaterialistic lifestyle. Thus I have to be very frugal in order to maintain the total freedom and bohemian lifestyle that I have.

So obviously I am not in any position to support a family not even my own or become some sort of Santa Claus or financial savior to others. Yet she feels responsible for supporting them. And is not happy that I can't help her with this.

Another issue between us is that I'm a big flirt who LOVES meeting new girls and partying with them. It's like my passion that I can't give. But she is the type who wants total monogamy and wants a guy who NEVER looks at any other girls except her. She says that this new guy she's dating never looks at other girls.

So now that she has found the type of guy she wants (generous, rich, monogamous it seems), should I just let her go so that she gets everything she wants, and so do I?

It's not that simple though, because we have a baby together that we both love. I want my son in my life, growing up with me, as any father would. That's what complicates things.

So should we try to make it work for the baby's sake? Even though we may not be that compatible and do not fulfill each other's needs? Tough call.

Or should I just let it go and try to find a girl who's less materialistic (like me), and not so poor that she needs a sugar daddy to support her family?

What do you think?

Thanks for listening.

WW777
http://www.filipino-forum.com
«134

Comments

  • if she's still open to fix your relationship, why not. it takes two to tango, apparently she doesn't want you anymore so why force it.

    whatever happens your the father. things would just be different though. that's life.
  • the fact the your GF is in love with another man does state she wants to be out of your relationship with her....also, you did admit that you couldn't support even a family of your own, i guess its better to let her go & find another man who could support her financially & your child...

    since you two are not yet married, custody of the baby remains to her...
  • JUST_JTJUST_JT PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    WWu777 wrote: »
    Hi everyone,
    My girlfriend called me a few days ago to say that she has been dating this white foreigner that she met online. She is ecstatic because he's very rich and generous with his money. He is happy to be a sugar daddy and Santa Claus (unlike me who is very frugal) which is what she wants. And unlike me, he does not complain about spending money, which is what she likes. (I don't understand why so many desperate white foreigners love to splurge their money and become Santa Claus, isn't that stupid?) She says she is falling in love with him because he's so kind and giving.

    She is a good person deep down, but she comes from a very poor family that needs money for food and school for her sisters. The thing is, I'm sort of a hippie who is nonmaterialistic and lives a nonmaterialistic lifestyle. Thus I have to be very frugal in order to maintain the total freedom and bohemian lifestyle that I have.

    So obviously I am not in any position to support a family not even my own or become some sort of Santa Claus or financial savior to others. Yet she feels responsible for supporting them. And is not happy that I can't help her with this.

    Another issue between us is that I'm a big flirt who LOVES meeting new girls and partying with them. It's like my passion that I can't give. But she is the type who wants total monogamy and wants a guy who NEVER looks at any other girls except her. She says that this new guy she's dating never looks at other girls.

    So now that she has found the type of guy she wants (generous, rich, monogamous it seems), should I just let her go so that she gets everything she wants, and so do I?

    It's not that simple though, because we have a baby together that we both love. I want my son in my life, growing up with me, as any father would. That's what complicates things.

    So should we try to make it work for the baby's sake? Even though we may not be that compatible and do not fulfill each other's needs? Tough call.

    Or should I just let it go and try to find a girl who's less materialistic (like me), and not so poor that she needs a sugar daddy to support her family?

    What do you think?

    Thanks for listening.

    WW777
    http://www.filipino-forum.com

    Kung ako ikaw:

    - Sa akin ang sanggol at ako ang magpapalaki sa aming anak;

    - Sumama na siya sa BF niyang puti na magpapaligaya sa kanya.

    O 'di ba magandang compromise ito? :)

    -Just_JT aka 'Boss Pogi'
    Life.is.full.of.compromises.
  • if she's still open to fix your relationship, why not. it takes two to tango, apparently she doesn't want you anymore so why force it.

    whatever happens your the father. things would just be different though. that's life.

    W: Well she said she's open to fixing it. But I'm not sure if she really means it or she's just saying it out of guilt. It's hard to say.

    Can money and generosity really create love in a Filipina? Doesn't the Catholic Church tell them that love and spirit are more important? Why do they worship money so much?
  • brick23 wrote: »
    the fact the your GF is in love with another man does state she wants to be out of your relationship with her....also, you did admit that you couldn't support even a family of your own, i guess its better to let her go & find another man who could support her financially & your child...

    since you two are not yet married, custody of the baby remains to her...

    W: I didn't say I couldn't support her and my son. I said I couldn't support HER immediately family (her mom and sisters).

    Can money really change a girl's heart? What happened to their Christian religion?

    How do you find a girl who's not so materialistic?
  • JUST_JTJUST_JT PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    WWu777 wrote: »
    Can money and generosity really create love in a Filipina? Doesn't the Catholic Church tell them that love and spirit are more important? Why do they worship money so much?

    'Di mo maaalis sa babae ang maghanap ng financial security. At yaman din lamang na wala ka namang balak pakasalan siya, naghahanap na siya ng iba na handa siyang pakasalan.

    -Just_JT aka "Boss Pogi"
    Mahalaga.sa.babae.ang.commitment.
  • JUST_JT wrote: »
    Kung ako ikaw:

    - Sa akin ang sanggol at ako ang magpapalaki sa aming anak;

    - Sumama na siya sa BF niyang puti na magpapaligaya sa kanya.

    O 'di ba magandang compromise ito? :)

    -Just_JT aka 'Boss Pogi'
    Life.is.full.of.compromises.

    There's no way she will let me raise the child. No mother would part with her child! Are you kidding?
  • ^^ Ako yan din ang issuggest ko eh. Pa'no ka naman makakasigurado na tatratuhing mabuti yung bata ng Kano?

    Sa'yo ang bata, dun s'ya sa Kano

    Kausapin mo nang masinsinan. Pakita mong mahal na mahal mo sya at ayaw mong sumama sya sa Kano pero dahil yun yung makakabuti sa kanya, e di kunwari wala kang choice pero ipakiusap mo na ikaw ang mag-aalaga sa bata pero libre naman s'ya at yung Kano na hiramin paminsan minsan. Mahirap yan pero pilitin mo s'ya at ipaunawa mo.

    "No mother would part with her child!" -Yes, just as "No father would let his child be raised by some white stranger." Lahat ng bagay napipilit. Aba eh baka pagsisihan mo kung hahayaan mo na sa ibang ama lumaki ang anak mo.

    Suggestion lang naman.
  • baklitabaklita PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    WWu777 wrote: »
    ... bohemian lifestyle that I have.

    Another issue between us is that I'm a big flirt who LOVES meeting new girls and partying with them. It's like my passion that I can't give. But she is the type who wants total monogamy and wants a guy who NEVER looks at any other girls except her. She says that this new guy she's dating never looks at other girls.

    It's not that simple though, because we have a baby together that we both love. I want my son in my life, growing up with me, as any father would. That's what complicates...

    What do you think?

    Thanks for listening.



    you are an irresponsible father. you don't seem to comprehend
    the obligations of a father. you also admitted you'd like to flirt.
    she doesn't deserve your attention.

    she realized that there's more future with the white guy and for
    her child. between the guys... she's pretty off with the puti at
    hindi ikaw.

    with her desire for a monogamous relationship and your flirtatious
    and bohemian life... your relationship won't last that long anyway.

    makapunta na nga sa mercado at makabili ng manok. magluluto si
    mother dear ko ng tinolang manok, noh!

    aihihihi!!! :lol:

    baklits


  • Leisha_haileyLeisha_hailey PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    let her go... first you're a flirt though you're still in a relationship.. that's being selfish... and may reasoning ka pang yan ang PASSION mo... a*hole ka eh.. and to think may anak na kayo... let the child stay with the mother.. you can't provide a better future for the child anyways... baka makuha pa ng bata ang pagiging irresponsable mo kung lalaki siya but kung babae ang anak mo.. baka ang karma mapunta sa bata... your kind pisses me off... i'm sorry to judge but then.. your girl and your child is better off with the foreigner... we'll just hope he's not your kind kung magtagal sila... kawawa ang bata....
  • WWu777 wrote: »
    Hi everyone,
    My girlfriend called me a few days ago to say that she has been dating this white foreigner that she met online. She is ecstatic because he's very rich and generous with his money. He is happy to be a sugar daddy and Santa Claus (unlike me who is very frugal) which is what she wants. And unlike me, he does not complain about spending money, which is what she likes. (I don't understand why so many desperate white foreigners love to splurge their money and become Santa Claus, isn't that stupid?) She says she is falling in love with him because he's so kind and giving.

    She is a good person deep down, but she comes from a very poor family that needs money for food and school for her sisters. The thing is, I'm sort of a hippie who is nonmaterialistic and lives a nonmaterialistic lifestyle. Thus I have to be very frugal in order to maintain the total freedom and bohemian lifestyle that I have.

    So obviously I am not in any position to support a family not even my own or become some sort of Santa Claus or financial savior to others. Yet she feels responsible for supporting them. And is not happy that I can't help her with this.

    Another issue between us is that I'm a big flirt who LOVES meeting new girls and partying with them. It's like my passion that I can't give. But she is the type who wants total monogamy and wants a guy who NEVER looks at any other girls except her. She says that this new guy she's dating never looks at other girls.

    So now that she has found the type of guy she wants (generous, rich, monogamous it seems), should I just let her go so that she gets everything she wants, and so do I?

    It's not that simple though, because we have a baby together that we both love. I want my son in my life, growing up with me, as any father would. That's what complicates things.

    So should we try to make it work for the baby's sake? Even though we may not be that compatible and do not fulfill each other's needs? Tough call.

    Or should I just let it go and try to find a girl who's less materialistic (like me), and not so poor that she needs a sugar daddy to support her family?

    What do you think?

    Thanks for listening.

    WW777
    http://www.filipino-forum.com

    i'm sorry but it looks like you have contradicting statements here. you're frugal BUT love meeting girls and partying with them? when guys meet girls, they spend, no matter how small that may be. :)
  • Leisha_haileyLeisha_hailey PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    yep the TS and his twisted reasonings... he's trying to wash his hands while trying to point out that..... oh.... come to think of it may fault naman din ang gf kasi nakikipagchat sa foreigner though may ka-relationship siyang si flirty TS... well then pare-pareho lang silang dalawa ni GF niya... cheats...
  • No, it only appears that he has twisted reasoning because the TS is not a he but the TS is a she/girl. All what she (TS) said appears to favor her, and does not favor him, and the TS is definitely destroying the reputation of the male partner. Hence, the TS is definitely a she/woman.
  • As a guy if have a parter like her (the TS). I would leave with our child and never see her again. Let her keep her money and her foreigner sugar daddy, let me keep my child.

    Sa mga ganitong situation there's no place for compromise and and no need for negotiation/communication, my first priority is to take action, get all what I can get especially the child and leave her. And I would tell that her mom is already dead.
  • WWu777 wrote: »
    There's no way she will let me raise the child. No mother would part with her child! Are you kidding?

    If you really care for her you will clean up your act and do anything to keep her. However, based on your statements, parang you are not a husband material. sorry to be so blunt, but at the end of the day kaming mga babae we want emotional and financial stability.
    She is right to look for someone who can support her both emotionally and financially. Don't worry, if the child will be raise overseas, basta communicate with the child regularly hindi ka rin malilimutan non.
  • One thing I've learned about women is they will only compromise when the situation favors them but they won't compromise when the situation don't favor them.

    They compromise because they have unfinished business with you-it means that the girl is only buying for time. And when the right time comes, like she got all what she wanted (i.e. child and money)-definitely she will never compromise and you'll never see her again ever. And she will bad mouth you behind your back on your child, and that would be--the final nail to your coffin.
  • lorna999 wrote: »
    If you really care for her you will clean up your act and do anything to keep her. However, based on your statements, parang you are not a husband material. sorry to be so blunt, but at the end of the day kaming mga babae we want emotional and financial stability.
    She is right to look for someone who can support her both emotionally and financially. Don't worry, if the child will be raise overseas, basta communicate with the child regularly hindi ka rin malilimutan non.

    ^That's a just a bait and a total ******** LOL

    There's no place for caring for each other in sepAration. In seperation each partner should only care for himself/herself. It is a total war LOL.
  • emanresu wrote: »
    ^That's a just a bait and a total ******** LOL

    There's no place for caring for each other in sepAration. In seperation each partner should only care for himself/herself. It is a total war LOL.

    I totally disagree with you I'm sorry. You are implying that the girl is selfish and she is only looking after her own interest. Mali ka dyan,
    sometimes there are things in life that we need to sacrifice to be able to have a good life. By going with Puti, she knows that her child will have a better life rather than spending her time with flirty no money guy that we have here. If this Girls is my sister, i will say to her GOOD ON YOU GIRL ! Money cannot buy everything but it will surely make your quality of life better.
  • ildiavoloildiavolo PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    kung ako sayo sundin mo na lang ang payo ni boss pogi. kunin mo ang anak nyo at bahala na sya sa buhay nya.
  • lorna999 wrote: »
    I totally disagree with you I'm sorry. You are implying that the girl is selfish and she is only looking after her own interest. Mali ka dyan,
    sometimes there are things in life that we need to sacrifice to be able to have a good life. By going with Puti, she knows that her child will have a better life rather than spending her time with flirty no money guy that we have here. If this Girls is my sister, i will say to her GOOD ON YOU GIRL ! Money cannot buy everything but it will surely make your quality of life better.

    Blame game is a normal process in separation as each partner race to make each look morally inferior (demoralized each other). It's a war LOL

    I don't care if you have billions of money. Because nothing and nobody can take away my dignity. Nobody can put me down. No body can take away my confidence. Not your money, not your blame games, not your superiority tricks. Nothing can take away my spirit.

    God will always be on my side, and you will always be on the evil side. God will always make me the winner.

    Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil,... because I know God is with me.

    In fact in real life, you won't even hear a single word from me, no argument, no negotiations, I would appear to be nice as naive or nothing really bad is going to happen in front of you, and then before you know it, I would be long gone with my Child LOL.

    Go ahead eat your money, and I don't care, and nobody cares because for me you are evil LOL
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