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would love to get lost

just wana share a story, gusto koh lang may malabasan ng emotions..

in 2006, b4 i finished college, i find out that my mom is having an affair with some guy thru text(may iluvu effect n) while my dad works abroad..i kept it to myself, investigating how true the event was. yet, pareho pala kami ng kapatid koh ng hinala and dumating sa point n nagkaron p ng confrontation thru fone.. it turned out n gay daw un, but the text messages dont seem that way.. wala kami proof and so we tried to gather it..

two years after, lumabas n naman un issue n un, its been a while and we thought its already over.. we thought n un pagsasawalang bhla nmin will help my mom realize how much we trust her n she could handle it by herself.. and so pinigilan koh n naman un srili koh trying to be so objective and positive with the situation instead..

last feb, sumabog n koh..parang ang dami n kcng ninvolve and un inaakla kong alam koh, sumambulat sakin n may mas madami pang issue...un bf ng mama koh back in hghschool, akalain moh, nsa malapit din pala cia n lugar and may continous communication sila..my bro was able to have some conversation with him thru text...we also learned n may involve din n kapitbahay nmin(iba n naman to, please note). she kept insisting n ndi para sa kanya un mga messages nun kpitbahay nmin...that caused my anxiety..iadd p dun n nwawala cia sa gabi kung minsan at magkakaron ng napagulong explaination after..

how f.u.c.k. that time was..nung nabuko nmin cia sa nanyari, cia pa un galit(sno nga naman ang aamin sa kasalanan nia).., s.h.i.t talaga, sinagot sagot koh un nanay koh, halos murahin koh cia sa galit..hatred, thats what i felt..hatred, un pinakaayaw koh maramdaman..pinamukha koh sa kanya kung gano cia ka-bless kay papa and kung gano cia kasama sa paningin koh..sabi koh, ndi koh cia mapapatawad..she admitted n may mali cia, yet the way she said sorry, pinakaembarrasing, it annoys me even more..i know shes not sincere at all and ginawa nia lang un kc ddting c papa for vacation..

time past, dumating un papa koh, ndi nia nlaman un tungkol dun(konsensya koh kung masira fam koh and winish koh n sna puwede koh p maayos)..

nag usap ulit kami ni mama, this time around, nkita koh n un sincerity nia..thought thats the end of it..

then, just few hours ago, ngicing akoh sa sinasbi ng bro koh n ndi pa umuuwi c mama(may tindahan kami ng school supplies, dun cia natutulog these days)..he told me n magkasama un kpitbhay nmin at c mama...pagdating n mama sa haus, she said that it was true, syempre, pinanindigan nia n friends lang sila nun guy and ksama nila un "gurlfriend" nun..yet, ndi convincing ang lies..

s.h.i.t, i thought makakapatay n un kapatid koh,nagwla talaga cia sa labas nun nkita nia un guy..magkaiba p sila ng alibi ni mama, panu n kami maniniwla..may hawak cia na malaking tubo(parang tambutso ata), and he is certainly to make the guy down..i cried hardly, cant imagine n hahantong sa gnun..buti ndi tinuloy ng kapatid koh..(first time koh cia makita na gnun and ndi koh tlg alam kung panu koh cia naawat)..

s.h.i.t, sa huli, kunwari nag explain c mama...pinakwento koh talaga sa kanya un buong pangyayari, im trying to figure out kung nagsisinungaling cia this tym...and just few minutes ago, pumunta dito un guy, hbang gigawa koh to..ang kapal ng mukha to render his bulshit explaination...

i dont really understand her..

would love to get lost, really..

Comments

  • try_0try_0 Member ✭✭
    I had almost the same story but it was my dad. . . . .I know how you feel. . . .I really had a hard time trusting him ever since. . .

    At the moment you will be angry and all the emotions will run high, there will come a time where everything will be quiet and only time can heal. Everything you feel is very natural just keep emotions in check and remember to pray.
  • liege_maharaneeliege_maharanee Member PExer
    thanks try_0 for your quick post..after making this thread, mdyo nging ok naman akoh, filing koh nga ngiging manhid n koh sa situation..

    naawa lang akoh sa dad koh...

    nwei, thanks again..
  • try_0try_0 Member ✭✭
    no worries. . . . .Everything will be allright. ok?

    Smile muna. . .
  • liege_maharaneeliege_maharanee Member PExer
    :depressed:
    how did you handle yours?
  • try_0try_0 Member ✭✭
    Confront the problem. . . .I am a very realistic person. In this kind of situation i decided to burn the bridge and build a new one for me and my dad.Although it would never be the same at least we can start all over again.

    How would like to do yours?
  • starry_nightstarry_night Member PExer
    to deny everything kahit huling huli na at paulit ulit pa...i think that's the thing that makes it more hurtful.

    kung ganon rin lang sana iniwan na lang kayo ng nanay niyo. no offense, isipin mo un, may kinakasama na siyang ibang guy. ano un, out of libog dahil wala ang dad mo??? o kaya siya nagsstay is because may pera dad mo. apparrently she doesn't want to end the affair. so why not just let you be. matatanda na naman kayo. kaya ninyo na sarili ninyo
  • fhendfhend Member PExer
    alam mo pareho tau ng ctwasyon.. nung nabasa ko to.. sa simula pareho tau.. ang pgkakaiba *** stranded ako.. di ko mgawang confrontahin ang mama ko.. at mgkkasama *** lahat ksama papa ko.. di ko alam kung ano gagawin.. years din ang lumipas cmula ng mahuli ko ** s txt. binalewala ko din.. until now gnun p rin, alam kong continous p rin **.. hayz.. cnbi ko n *** sa srili ko n pag nagkabukingan na.. kelangan tanggapin kung ano man ang mangyyri..
  • jamjrjamjr Member PExer
    If sa akin mangyayari to, I would try to ask my mother kung anong rason nya bakit nya ginawa yun. Maybe masyado syang lonely, or maybe may alam sya na di nya sinasabi sa akin (e.g. may ibang pamilya na tatay ko sa abroad).

    Iisipin ko din baka kasalanan ko. Baka naghahanap lang ang nanay ko ng karamay, ng makakausap, at hindi ko yun nabibigay sa kanya.

    Maybe may mga problema ang nanay ko na hindi nya masabi sa akin, kasi ayaw nyang masangkot ako sa gulo o ayaw nyang mamroblema ako.

    Pero I would not judge her talaga, she can do as she pleases. If that is where is she is happy, then hahayaan ko sya. I think she is old enough naman to know what is right from wrong, and realize the consequences of her actions.

    Iisipin ko din, baka ayaw nya na talaga sa tatay ko, hindi lang nya kaya bitawan kasi (if wala sya work and nakadepend financially sa asawa) pano nya bubuhayin mga anak nya.

    Generally, situations like these should be approached with an open mind kasi we don't know everything.
  • fhendfhend Member PExer
    jamjr wrote: »
    If sa akin mangyayari to, I would try to ask my mother kung anong rason nya bakit nya ginawa yun. Maybe masyado syang lonely, or maybe may alam sya na di nya sinasabi sa akin (e.g. may ibang pamilya na tatay ko sa abroad).

    Iisipin ko din baka kasalanan ko. Baka naghahanap lang ang nanay ko ng karamay, ng makakausap, at hindi ko yun nabibigay sa kanya.

    Maybe may mga problema ang nanay ko na hindi nya masabi sa akin, kasi ayaw nyang masangkot ako sa gulo o ayaw nyang mamroblema ako.

    Pero I would not judge her talaga, she can do as she pleases. If that is where is she is happy, then hahayaan ko sya. I think she is old enough naman to know what is right from wrong, and realize the consequences of her actions.

    Iisipin ko din, baka ayaw nya na talaga sa tatay ko, hindi lang nya kaya bitawan kasi (if wala sya work and nakadepend financially sa asawa) pano nya bubuhayin mga anak nya.

    Generally, situations like these should be approached with an open mind kasi we don't know everything.

    parang ang daling sbihin.. pero pag ikw ang nsa sitwasyon .. ewan ko lang.. iba kc.. nanay ang gumawa, di mo ineexpect n mangyyari un..what ever the reason.. alam nya p rin ang tama at mali.. pti anak nya nilagay nya sa risk..
  • jamjrjamjr Member PExer
    ^ you're right. iba pa rin talaga pagnaandun na ako. (wag naman sana). but i respect her freedom, as she does mine. naisip ko lang, kung ang nanay nga tatanggapin ang kanyang anak kahit ano pa man sya, bakit hindi ko kayang ireturn sa kanya yun?
  • guys..salamat sa lhat ng nagpost ha..***** koh ln to ulit nabuksan..nwei, madami pa nanyari after ng incident n to..but to make it short..i decided to give her a chance..**** feeling koh lumayo n un loob koh sa kanya..
  • Hello liege maharanee! I just pass thru and I become curious to this trend. Anyway, I think this problem can be resolve by your parents but you can also help them. Base sa mga story, your mama is doing it many times already although she always denied your accussation. You mentioned also that on one instances she feels sorry of what she is doing but the same thing she revert back to her old habits.

    I think this problem has more deeper reason than what it seems to be. Why don't you ask also your father and your mother if they are still in-love to each other. If their communication and trust is still there. You only see one side of the coin but maybe it is better to see the other side too. The problem like this is not uncommon nowadays because husband or wife needs to work abroad inorder to meet the financial needs of the family. And course both parties are being subjected to loneliness especially if communication is not that constant.

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