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My Friend is an EXHIBITIONIST...

How can i help him?


  • IraIra PEx Rookie ⭐
    What exactly do you mean by exhibitionist?
  • he masturbates in front of other people....
  • IraIra PEx Rookie ⭐
    Does he do it on a dare or because he can't help it?

    The criteria for exhibitionism according to the DSM-IV manual (the psychiatrists' bible) are: 1.) Over a period of at least 6 months, recurrent intense sexual urges and sexually arousing fantasies involving the exposure of one's genitals to an unsuspecting stranger, and 2.) The person has acted on these urges, is markedly distressed by them, or has caused impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. Some acts of exposure may actually just be experimentation, which is common in adolescents, wherein the act is only done for its novel effect and isn't done recurrently. In any case, your friend needs professional help if he fits the criteria--not only is his behavior abnormal, it is also illegal and poses a danger to him. Convince your friend to seek professional counselling. Paraphiliacs need to be guided in regaining self-esteem and improve their interpersonal skills, and to be taught socially acceptable ways of fulfilling sexual urges.
  • Male or female? (Common to males, that's why)
    How old or how young? (Common to pre-teens)
    What does he/she exactly do?
    (There are types of ***** as well, that's why)

    In any case, Dr. Ira is right!
    I think he has said it all. :shy:
  • IraIra PEx Rookie ⭐
    I'm a she.
  • mark_markmark_mark PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    :lol::lol: yeah, i can attest that she's a she.:D
  • Now, i know you're a lady physician.

    I used "HE" because I just followed what my English teacher in Speech and Grammar taught me back in College.

    If in doubt of one's danger, use the GENERAL HE/HIM
    unless otherwise corrected.

    Thanks again.:*)
  • Originally posted by GreekGod

    If in doubt of one's :boom:danger,:boom: use the GENERAL HE/HIM
    unless otherwise corrected.

    Thanks again.:*)

    Please change danger to GENDER
  • my friend is a 28 y/o male (bi?)....

    as confided:

    when he was in his teen years, he masturbates where there are people looking/watching....(he is extremely good-looking)

    he overcame it when he graduated from HS but lately he's into it again....

    he had two girlfriends and presently unattached, now, he prefers to be watched by guys....

    he works out in a gym where he walks naked inside the vanity area though he said, "only if there are no ***** around" and "macho" guys are present...

    he said, this "recurred back" after he saw a male neighbor (with family--presumed to be "straight") watching/peeping him naked....he was aroused! then he started doing it again, not only with his "male neighbor" but also in gym/public places....

    Some questions:
    He doesnt have any sexual contact w/ gays/males....but --- Is he gay?

    What should i tell him?
  • IraIra PEx Rookie ⭐
    I wouldn't presume that he's gay--exhibitionists get their pleasure from the imminent risk of getting caught while masturbating, whether by females or males, it doesn't matter. It's the danger that's the kick, not the gender of the observer. The only one who can answer whether your friend is a homosexual or not would be himself. Tell your friend to consult a psychiatrist. He needs help.
  • If a man engages in sex with another man then he is a male homosexual. If not, he is just a man. Ok?

    What kind of man, you may ask?
    Perhaps, a man who is free to make his own choices or preferences.

    These choices or preferences may or may not get societal, cultural, or ecclesiastical approval:grrr:

    You cannot, professionally.
  • thanx for all your replies...

    i'll just update you with all of his adventures....
  • I am not really sure if your friend is a psychiatric case. You see, we all have our little "perversions." Like fetishes, example. Getting horny seeing underwear, for instance. It becomes a psychiatric case when the "perversion" becomes too...well...let me say that it becomes an obsession that it distracts one from the normal course of living, becoming a nuisance to himself and to other people. It also becomes a case when it becomes the sole source of sexual pleasure replacing sex itself, desiring and prefering it even when sex is readily available. I guess getting aroused by exhibiting one's body or seeing someone getting aroused by one's nakedness is...well...not really an objectionable or abnormal feeling. I know some people who likes having sex in public toilets (when there's no other people, that is) with strangers. Somehow the thrill of being on the edge, and of being accidentally discovered adds to the thrill to the sex. And to my best knowledge, they are not psychos. Unless it is destructive (to one's life, in particular, and to other people), it is okay.

    The fact that your friend's telling you about it in a clear and sensible manner is sign that it is "mild" or okay. It may be a phase that can come and go. I think your reaction should not be of disgust or horror or thinking him as some kind of freak, as this may be detrimental to his self-image. If it turns to be just a "normal pervasion," you may have unwittingly given him some baggage. Anyway, if it gets to be objectionable to some other people, you can tell your friend to tone it down. But I think he knows the limit and how he would go his way. I think it's okay for now.
  • Originally posted by asterisk
    I am not really sure if your friend is a psychiatric case...
    Anyway, if it gets to be objectionable to some other people, you can tell your friend to tone it down. But I think he knows the limit and how he would go his way. I think it's okay for now.

    In my medical point of view as a physician, I dont think he is okay.
    The friend is 28 years old. If he knows the limit, he should have stopped it. But he's not stopping it.
    Or at least realize that he needs help.

    For Eric Ericson, a developmental psychologist,
    he should have overcome his what you may call as "little perversions". He should be going on with his developmental tasks.

    :lol:Hahahaha...how do you tone down EXHIBITIONISM?
    By doing it less frequently? By not showing all?

    Exhibitionism as paraphilia entails sexual fantasies, urges, & practices repetitive in nature that are outside the normal sphere of healthy human sexuality, ok?

    Exhibitionists assert masculinity by showing their penis and by watching the reactions of the spectators.
    It is objectionable to the community.
    SPANISH GUITAR, obviously, is bothered.

    It is a psychiatric case classified under DSM-IV as what Dr. Ira said.:smokin:
  • IraIra PEx Rookie ⭐
    asterisk: Studies have shown that exhibitionists get their kicks from the danger of getting discovered, not from who watches them. It's not what turns you on--it's how you go about getting that kick. In your friends' cases, sex in public places and in exposing themselves occur among consenting adults. In Spanish Guitar's friend's case, the "viewer" isn't willing. As I have said, the method of getting sexual satisfaction poses danger both to him (he might get beatten up) and to others. As for telling Spanish about it, I don't necessarily consider telling someone a secret as being okay about it. It may also be looked at as a cry for help, maybe.
  • Originally posted by GreekGod
    Originally posted by asterisk

    It is a psychiatric case classified under DSM-IV as what Dr. Ira said.:smokin:

    DSM is a book written and published by a community of psychiatrists.

    DSM-IV means the 4th edition of DSM.

    DSM, therefore, is not a name for sexual behavioral disorder.;)
  • my friend is out of control!

    last new year's eve...

    he jacked off in front of a girl....

    what should i do?
  • IraIra PEx Rookie ⭐
    He's not your responsibility, although it's nice that you want to help him. Tell his parents about his problem, they're in a better position to something about it.
  • :redgrin: so, who's the guy anyway? well, my friend's sorta into the thing too. and guess what?! He's a total hottie!!!! his no. is [edited out. Do not post other people's private information here. You are violating their privacy. -Ira].

    p.s. he even did it (are u ready for this?) on the church community grounds somewhere in las pinas. I'm sure he's willing to see your friend do his thang!
  • it's true!!!!!! my friend did (he was with me when we read the thread, o di ba parang nag rap pa ko?) and i guess he was waiting for the guys reply. i am protecting his privacy, if not i would've disclosed his name. so y dont we just sit back and relax and have the two gorgeous exhibitionists have the time of tehir lives. (his number is

    I will not allow this forum to be misused by you or your friend. You've been warned. -Ira
This discussion has been closed.