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pag paulit-ulit bumabagsak ang li'l bro mo sa school anong gagawin mo?

need your advice naman po.

di ko na kasi maintindihan yung bro ko e. i tried asking him once, kung anong problem, wala naman daw. lumipat na nga sya ng course dahil mahirap daw yung first subject nya, at pinayagan ko naman. pero still bagsak pa rin yung mga majors. di ko kasi sya nakikitang nag-aaral sa haus, puro text sa gf nya ang inaatupag. dapat 3rd year na sya, pero dahil iilan pa lang ang naipapasa nyang major subjects, malamang lalagpas sya ng 4 yrs.

mejo mahirap, kasi ako ang nagpapaaral. masakit syempre sakin kasi pinaghihirapan ko rin yun. pero at the same time, i'm after my li'l bro's future. bunso kasi namin, at gusto ko me mangyari sa kanya.

dapat ko ba syang pahintuin even for a sem, para magtanda or what? anong pwede kong gawin para magfocus sya sa pag-aaral? help naman :(

Comments

  • jazzyjazzy PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    Kung isang nagpapahirap e yung relationship sa GF nya, pwede mong kausapin ng maayos yung girl na mag focus sila sa pag-aaral nila. Hindi naman brekin. Pwede mo ring sabihin sa babae na i-encourage yung bro mo to study.

    Whenever you talk to your bro, don't tell him what you want but let him hear what he wants to hear.

    Example, sabihin mo na her GF will be proud of him kung tapos sya sa pag aaral nya. He can give her GF expensive gifts pag may work na sya.
  • Tinanong mo na ba kung ano gusto ng bro mo? Baka naman ayaw nya mag-aral. Mahirap pilitin ang ayaw.

    Kung sakaling pahihintuin mo sya ndi sana bilang parusa. Sana para bigyan sya ng pagkakataon mag-isip kung ano gusto nya mangyari.
  • basta pumapasok pa ren sa school, kahit bumabagsak ok lang! ang alalahanin mo pag hindi na pumapasok... :bop:
  • froshie1froshie1 PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    magreality check kayo, tanungin mo kung gusto nyang magutom kasi paghindi sya nakapagaral eh magugutom sya. i-explain mo na paano sya kikita kung una tamad sya, ok lang kung gifted sya katulad ni Bill Gates pero sa tono ng kwento mo mukhang hindi. Tell your bro na walang libre sa mundo, bawat kinakain nya, sinusuot nya sa katawan, gimmick nya, pagsisine nya, commute nya eh may bayad iyon. Bago nya makuha iyong pang bayad in reality paghihirapan nya iyon at hindi libre. Kung hindi madala, eh di sabihin mo from now on he's on his own.
  • baklitabaklita PEx Veteran ⭐⭐


    sa daloy ng iyong kwento...it appears that he's more interested in
    his gf than being serious in his academics. wla syang interest sa pag-
    aaral at wla syang paki kung babagsak sya sa mga major subjects.

    kausapin mo talga sya ng masinsinan at paaalahanin na todo suporta
    ka sa kanyang pag-aaral kung todo seryoso rin sya. warn him that if
    he remains unconcerned in his study... you are compelled to cease all
    financial support for him.

    there's only so much you can do. despite ng iyong mga tulong...
    nasa kanya pa rin ang focus at determinasyon.

    ako na laang ipadala mo sa isang hair seminar. tapos nako sa
    electrolysis, noh! bibigyan kita ng libreng fishball mula sa kanto...

    aihihihi!!! :)

    baklita





  • ayaneayane PExer
    it would depend on your bro actually.

    is he the type who will pursue what he wants despite the odds stacked against him? or is he the type who will look at an obstacle, think it's too much trouble and just give up?

    if he knows how to fight, he just might find the determination to finish his studies when your financial support is taken from him. unless, of course, he doesn't really want to graduate anymore.

    personally, when my mom stopped paying for my tuition, i realized i wanted to study again. i did everything i can do so i can continue my studies and graduate. not easy if you're paying 40-60k per term. and since my mom didn't want to pay for anything, i had to get a scholarship and work in school as a student assistant to get some tuition discount. sometimes i would ask my dad to finance what's left of my tuition bill, sometimes (as much as i hate to admit it) i'd borrow money from my boyfriend. i did pay him back. (also the reason why i did what i can so i could get extra tickets in our graduation ceremony. he helped a lot to let me graduate, least i can do is let him be there when i walk up the stage! ;) )

    hopefully, your brother is the former. ;)
  • Ice BurnIce Burn PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    Why should you support someone who doesn't help himself? If he doesn't want to study why should you pour your money down the drain for someone that's obviously a good for nothing ingrate? The problem with many Filipino families is that they mollycoddle the boys especially if the boys are the youngest. And with this kind of mentality, these idiots know that someone will pick up after them.

    No matter how much you try to make something happen for him, as long as he doesn't help himself, you're basically pouring money down a rat hole. It's a losing investment.

    Frankly cut him off. It'll be a reality check for him that not everyone will be there to pick him up. If he wants to make something out of himself then he will. If not, then it's not your problem because it's not your life he's ruining but his own.
  • lalinlalin PExer
    thanks sa mga payo guys. mejo nakakapagisip-isip na ko nang gagawin ngayon.

    hmm.. i tried talking to him once, nung last last sem wherein sa 10++ subjects nya 3 lang pinasa nya, puro minors at pe pa ata yung 1. super galit na galit ako nun, naiyak pa nga ako habang kinakausap ko sya. tinanong ko sya kung gusto nya pa mag-aral, gusto pa raw. ok lang daw ang course nya, pero hindi nya rin masabi sa akin ang problem. so we made a truce na kung may bagsak sya sa susunod na sem, ako na bahala sa kanya. e may binagsak ulit, isang major, mejo may improvement sa minors pero majors bagsak pa rin.

    behaved sya ngayon sa haus. hindi pa kasi ako nagsasalita about sa schooling nya, e enrollment pa naman. balak ko pa rin syang kausapin kung ano ba talaga pero siguro sa weekend na lang.

    siguro i'll to talk to his gf na rin. para ngang gusto ko kausapin silang dalawa. sa ngayon di ko naman pinapakitang galit ako, para kung mag-uusap kami, hindi sya matatakot mag-open up sa akin. parang gusto ko rin muna syang patigilin na parang ayoko rin kasi nanghihinayang ako sa time. siguro encourage ko syang kumuha ng part-time job, para naman alam nyang mahirap ang buhay ngayon.

    thanks po :)
  • lalin wrote: »
    thanks sa mga payo guys. mejo nakakapagisip-isip na ko nang gagawin ngayon.

    hmm.. i tried talking to him once, nung last last sem wherein sa 10++ subjects nya 3 lang pinasa nya, puro minors at pe pa ata yung 1. super galit na galit ako nun, naiyak pa nga ako habang kinakausap ko sya. tinanong ko sya kung gusto nya pa mag-aral, gusto pa raw. ok lang daw ang course nya, pero hindi nya rin masabi sa akin ang problem. so we made a truce na kung may bagsak sya sa susunod na sem, ako na bahala sa kanya. e may binagsak ulit, isang major, mejo may improvement sa minors pero majors bagsak pa rin.

    behaved sya ngayon sa haus. hindi pa kasi ako nagsasalita about sa schooling nya, e enrollment pa naman. balak ko pa rin syang kausapin kung ano ba talaga pero siguro sa weekend na lang.



    siguro i'll to talk to his gf na rin. para ngang gusto ko kausapin silang dalawa. sa ngayon di ko naman pinapakitang galit ako, para kung mag-uusap kami, hindi sya matatakot mag-open up sa akin. parang gusto ko rin muna syang patigilin na parang ayoko rin kasi nanghihinayang ako sa time. siguro encourage ko syang kumuha ng part-time job, para naman alam nyang mahirap ang buhay ngayon.

    thanks po :)


    naku po ate wag mo siyang patigilin lalo na gusto naman pala niyang mag-aral. meron nga jan eh kahit gustong papagaraln ng magulang ayaw talaga ng bata. and i understand how you feel kasi nagpapaaral din po ako ng kapatid. i'm 22 at ang kapatid ko eh nursing pa ang kinukuha! :rolleyes: pero ok lang naman kasi good grade snaman binibigay niya sakin. ang advise ko lang eh maganda ngang kausapin mo sila mabuti kasama ang gf kasi baka sobrang puro love love lang inaatupag nila eh hindi naman nila makakain yun in the future...:) pero sabi mo nga nagiimprove naman siya eh baka kulang lang talaga siya sa focus.appreciate mo nalang iyong improvement niya peroa sk him na konti pang effort to produce good grades....;)
  • lalin malaki nga yang problema n yan.. kung ndi ako bunso at may kapatid akong ganyan, nabatukan ko n yan ng ilang beses.. hehe, pero seryoso ako, ikaw pa kamo ang nagpapa-aral? grrrr!!! mababatukan ko tlga yan kung ako un e.. xnxa na mejo brutal ako konti..

    mahina b cia sa networking? lol, sa room nmn ndi mwawala ung kopyahan so makaka2long un.. ( nggng realistic lng ako d2, ung iba wag masyado magalit!, peace tau) and kung meron ciang set of friends na classmates nia na nag-aaral dn na maganda un kc matutulungan cia nun 4 sure.. pero remember kelanagan dn nia magexert ng effort.. as in 3x p ng gnwa nia b4, kausapin mo at ipakita mo na ndi kna natutuwa sa mga pinaggagawa nia..

    also, pray k dn na magbago sya, espcially sa study habits nia.. un lng, sna wag mo patigilin ng pag--aaral, bka lalaong tanarin yan pag kumita na ng pera.. hav a gud day! pray k lng.. God bless lalin!
  • archgoldarchgold PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    Hey keep supporting your bro baka kailangan lang niya ng motivation for now.

    Is your brother enrolled in a regular college or university? Have you asked him baka mas interested siya sa mga technical vocational courses kung saan very practical ang approach and hands on pa?

    If you can no longer afford to send him to a regular college, you might opt for the vocational courses.

    Suggestion lang.
  • orangepinkorangepink PEx Veteran ⭐⭐
    maybe he's afraid to face the real world once he graduates and that's why he keeps on failing in subjects. baka iniisip niya ndi mo na siya tutulungan pag natapos na siya sa college.
  • DunedainDunedain PEx Influencer ⭐⭐⭐
    Ice Burn wrote: »
    Why should you support someone who doesn't help himself? If he doesn't want to study why should you pour your money down the drain for someone that's obviously a good for nothing ingrate? The problem with many Filipino families is that they mollycoddle the boys especially if the boys are the youngest. And with this kind of mentality, these idiots know that someone will pick up after them.

    No matter how much you try to make something happen for him, as long as he doesn't help himself, you're basically pouring money down a rat hole. It's a losing investment.

    Frankly cut him off. It'll be a reality check for him that not everyone will be there to pick him up. If he wants to make something out of himself then he will. If not, then it's not your problem because it's not your life he's ruining but his own.


    The only reasonable post with regards to the subject. Folks just don't realize that everything has a limit - especially finances.

    A couple of thoughts for the threadstarter:

    1. Does anyone even bother thinking what the tuition fee is for? Is it to pay the school to get to expand one's social life? Or is it to pay the school so that one could at least learn something that will be of use for the future?

    2. Let's assume that he banks on the social thing. Question is: how long will it last? Is popularity much more important that learning something? Sure, socializing does create networking to all sorts of jobs. But what if he can't perform?

    3. Does he even bother to realize what will become of him in the next 5 or 10 years? I've known a couple of people who didn't even bother to get a college degree for the same reason: Ipepetition ako ng nanay ko para makarating ako sa States! They also ended up with the same fate: both their mothers died. What have become of them? I'll leave that thought to you, but I will say: It isn't pretty.
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