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inviting out someone who is attached

qwivixurqwivixur shadowy figure PExer
here's the situation

there's this certain girl that i kinda feel attracted to, though i haven't got the chance to know her quite well yet. so you can imagine that little frustration that as i was trying to make my first move, i find out out na may bf na sya. :(

while a part of me tells me to forget, the other part is telling me to go ahead and get to know the girl more as a friend and no longer as a prospective gf. i have to admit she's an interesting person, not to mention the fact we both hail from the same home province. what i have in mind is to invite her out sana for some gimmick or whatever she's interested in doing.

right now i'm having the dilemma is how to say it right, and whether i'm doing the right thing in the first place. i guess my concern is how to do it in a way na baka mamisinterpret ng iba as trying to break up a relationship which is the last thing i want to happen because of this. i have to admit i'm a bit dorky on these matters :D

your inputs are very much appreciated. thanks!
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Comments

  • st.angerst.anger Domo! ✭✭✭
    know the girl more as a friend? impossible.

    heck, if you feel confident enough and you have the guts, go for it. good luck on making it appear as though you have "clean" intentions.
  • DeadHungryDeadHungry Member PExer
    Been there done that..hahaha There is such a thing pala as karma.. and learned what I did was wrong the hard way pa.. hahaha
  • Leih1234Leih1234 Registered User PExer
    ^ wag mo na lokohin sarili mo. The only reason why you would want to know her better is when you want more. . . otherwise, you would just stop, right?

    Iba iba ang babae. If you ask her out, pede siya maturn off sa yo coz she will feel insulted that you even have the guts to ask her out when you know for a fact she is committed.

    Yung iba, she will reject you outright sabay sumbong pa sa boyfriend. In which case, markado ka na... or worse, pinagtatawanan ka lang nila.

    Pede rin, kung nagkakagulo sila ng boyfriend nila, na sumama siya sa yo and well, who knows....pero ang babae na hindi pa iniiwan ang boyfriend kahit me problema sila ay ang mga babae na naghahanap lang ng "mapaglilibangan" habang si lalake eh umaasa na magiging true love to. Hindeeee.

    Yung iba, pedeng umoo at makipaglaro. After all, it feels good to be desired by men. Gusto mo ba talga to?

    Pero marami, they would honor their bfs and wouldn't even think of going out with you even in the guise of friendship lang.....di ka nya kilala masyado take note.

    So, ikaw, bahala ka.. di ko alam kung ano maganda diskarte.....pero good luck.
  • SayeeshaSayeesha Her' Majesty's Paladin PExer
    Personally... kung sa akin nangyari na may nag-invite na makipag-date tapos may boyfriend pa ako, iwas to the max ako. I have no respect ni isang katiting na atom man lang sa isang lalaking mangaagaw... kadalasan din kasi ang mga lalaking ganiyan, para lang masabi na naka-agaw siya ng girlfriend ng may girlfriend, pa macho epek.

    One guy did that to me, di ko alam (kasi I considered him as little bro) habang nakatalikod pala ako, eh pinagkakalat niya na conquest niya lang ako at bumibigay na ako. Since then, mega iwas na ako sa kaniya.
  • erap_arroyo99erap_arroyo99 Banned by Admin PExer
    dude, are you a snake?

    answer is you dont. you dont ask someone out if that someone is attached. let's see how you feel when you are on the opposite end.
  • choco99piechoco99pie Member PExer
    painosente ka pa.
  • ayaneayane Member PExer
    personally, i don't mind making friends.

    i even don't mind even if i know the guy likes me. BUT i have my limits.

    no matter what he says, it will purely be a platonic relationship on my part. and yes, i'll tell my boyfriend about him. i'll tell him that this guy told me he likes me but he'll settle to be my friend.

    my boyfriend does not really meddle in those affairs, as long as the guy knows his limits.

    besides, as i always tell them... if i do go out with them and entertain them while i'm in a relationship, it will make me look bad.

    pero galit na galit siya once nung may nag-text sakin ng "boyfriend pa lang pala eh, pwede pa yan!" :rotflmao: too bad for him, i'm not too attached to my phone, so i asked my boyfriend to read my messages then. nabasa niya. :D deleted siya sa phone book ko in front of me. eh, mataray ako sa unregistered numbers! so i never got to talk to him again. or maybe i did, tinarayan ko lang! :rotflmao:
  • JongaJonga Banned by Admin PExer
    while a part of me tells me to forget, the other part is telling me to go ahead and get to know the girl more as a friend and no longer as a prospective gf.

    you know what, if you really intend to know her only and not to love her as a GF, try inviting her out for dinner, with his BF. lets see if your motives are true ;)
  • the_icewolfthe_icewolf in the DMZ... PExer
    ^^ yan nga rin nangyari sa kin eh...

    yung nakilala ko eh, masaya siyang kasama... and thought that "hmmm malabong walang bf ang ganitong kaganda at masarap pa kausap!!!"

    naconfirm ko na meron... just imagining her kiss her bf just makes me want to be angry at myself for falling too soon... i admit na mabilis akong nahulog sa kanya... pero at least eh di ko na ipupursue itong prospect na ito... daming tsiks na single pa... doon na ko...

    i suggest na you dont hang around this girl anymore... ako eh hindi na rin makikipagkita dun...

    mas matagal ko siyang nakilala eh, dami nang pinagusapan, ibibigay pa yung cp# eh me bf naman pala... ano naman kaya iooffer ko sa kanya na di kayang ibigay ng kanyang bf???
  • baklitabaklita taas kilay PExer



    pag umeksena ka sa babaeng may bf... ang maging role mo...
    bilang friend o may ibang layunin ka... ikaw yung mang-aagaw
    ng kasintahan na may kasintahan. no tresspassing ka, noh!

    gusto mo rin bang mangyari na pag gf ka... eh may ibang
    makikipapel bilang manliligaw sayong gf? it's a matter of respect
    for other relationship not your own. gusto mo maging fatal
    attraction angyong kalabasan?

    bukod na laang kung ikaw si baklita... that's me!

    aihihihi!!! :)

    baklita




  • 24242424 Guest PExer
    qwivixur wrote: »
    here's the situation


    right now i'm having the dilemma is how to say it right, and whether i'm doing the right thing in the first place. i guess my concern is how to do it in a way na baka mamisinterpret ng iba as trying to break up a relationship which is the last thing i want to happen because of this. i have to admit i'm a bit dorky on these matters :D

    your inputs are very much appreciated. thanks!

    :D Your are trying to break up a relationship, yes you are.

    Talagang mamimissinterpret ng iba yan, pag type ka ng chick may posibilidad na mapa-ibig mo siya, pero kung hindi naman at malalim na pala ang pinagsamahan nila ng bf niya e, malabo ng mangyari iyan
  • bishopbishop amdg PExer
    if you want to do it, go for it. you never know. you and the girl might be better off with each other than her with her current squeeze.

    be ready to get rejected too though. at the end of the day, it's the girl's decision whether to entertain you or not.
  • shychicshychic paradoxical PExer
    You do have a sadistic streak, don't you? Oh boy, you're gonna fall big time if you go on with your plan. Besides how sure are you that she'll gonna accept your invitation?

    Well if you must, then go out in a group. That way you won't focus your attention all to her, thus, less hurt for you, less misinterpretation by other people.
  • kaboomeranglekaboomerangle brainwashed soul PExer
    if you wanna take your chances and end up more of a dork than what you say you are, go ahead and make a fool of yourself, lolz.. :D just kidding.

    seriously, I hope you realize this is a risky thing you're going to do there. just remember to control your emotions if ever you'll go ahead with this.
  • blue_tracerblue_tracer soundscapes ✭✭✭
    thread starter:

    may kababawan pa ang sitwasyon. ngunit tila ika'y balisa na. papano na kaya kung lumalim pa ito?

    you havent got a chance yet to know her quite well, you said.. you want to know her more as a friend rather than a prospective gf.. etc..

    katulad ng aking napuna, may kababawan pa ang sitwasyon. marapat lang siguro na pag-aralan mo muna ang iyong damdamin bago ka gumawa ng ano mang hakbang.

    this thing called 'attraction' often creates some ripples of excitement. but be calculative.. and dont just watch yourself easily 'fall' for this girl unless you already fully understand the things (if ever, there are) that surround between you and her.

    feelings, especially at this early stage, can be sometimes deceiving. dont be carried away this early. stay on track and be realistic.

    avoid inviting those usual 'semi-bugoy' ideas such as di-pa-naman-sila-kasal or the 'semi-illusion' meant-to-be concept just because both you hail from the same province.

    by befriending her, you're worried, you said, that you might get misinterpreted in the process.. well, what made you think that you're that capable enough to shake their boat? (no pon intended)

    yes, she may be special.. to you. but it doesnt mean there's a strong necessity to do any moves yet.

    walang masama kung binabalak maging kaibigan siya. subalit, wala ring masama kung hindi mo na siya kakaibiganin pa. bakit pa kasi? baka isakasama mo pa ng loob ito. ika'y maghintay na lamang ng mga babaing makikilala mo sa mga hindi inaasahang panahon.. at baka sila pa mismo ang gustong kaibiganin at kagustuhan ka.

    sa kabilang dako:

    kung talagang malakas ang tama mo dito sa babaing ito, ang maganda muna dito ay umatras ka at maghintay ng tamang panahon. pakinggan mo muna at pag-aralan gaano katatag ang relasyon ng kanyang bf para maging maliwanag sa isip mo kung kailan at papano mo gagawin ang mga hakbang na nararapat.

    goodie-goodie lak! :)
  • batinks13batinks13 Alaktrikal Gingineer PExer
    dude, your attraction to this girl would just grow more once you get to go out with her, hang out or whatever. Di mo na mapipigilan yan, and once you're there, here comes the snake in you..hehehe

    tuloy tuloy na yan. the downward spiral. beware.
  • kuting_kittenkuting_kitten Beach, please. ✭✭
    of course you want to break the relationship. if you really want to know her better and steal her from her bf, do your thing but be sure you are ready to take such big RISK (there's a big chance of rejection here). and be sure you are BETTER than the bf.

    proviso: if you want her ONLY as a fantasy (yes, sexual) don't push it. that i am against of. pero kung gusto mong karirin talaga as a gf, go.

    i'm no angel, sweetie. :) good luck.
  • John StrangeJohn Strange Il nome suo nessun sapr?... PExer
    bad idea man, let it slide and move on.

    dont pine over something that's gonna put you in a bad situation down the road.

    at the end of the day ya gotta be able to look yourself in the mirror.

    besides you never know who you may meet around the corner

    take it easy.

    J.
  • grayegcivicgrayegcivic LoveMYWRXSTiToo PExer
    st.anger wrote: »
    know the girl more as a friend? impossible.

    heck, if you feel confident enough and you have the guts, go for it. good luck on making it appear as though you have "clean" intentions.

    I have to agree...to the OP: Come on foo... who you kidding!!! Find somebody else to be "friend" with! Im sure you don't want her BF to be your GF's friend...right?? right???
  • Cookie_MobsterCookie_Mobster Blank PExer
    eto..

    how do i ask someone out? if he has a gf na? :) yun bang "friendly date" saan ko kaya sya pwede ayain?
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