guidelines for surviving long distance relationship

rave81

well, sad to say next yr on the month of March or April im about to leave this country and migrate to australia, and i made a promise to my gf il return for her, i really love her so much, right now we are already 7 months, i hope wish can wait for me, so peps can you post ur guidelines how to survive the "Long distance rela",

angelise

You should have all forms of communication available, and use it to the max. Write emails, send text messages, or even chat using your mobile phone. The thing is, you should grow together, even if you are physically apart.

maxieGRL

one important factor in an LDR..

trust

give it and dont do anything break it.


good luck...im telling you now its not easy. and an LDR is very expensive

rave81

yah i think its very expensive, well i have in mind that before i leave this country il make her preggy , actually im really thinking about that right now..., but i ask her of cors she doesn't want to as of now bcoz she is still studying...

raventina

Impregnating her (without her consent) is one of the most selfish acts I've ever heard! :eek:

Besides, are you in a position to support a family with the baby on the way? Once she's pregnant, you'd have to be responsible for the baby. You'd have to feed him/her, put him/her through school, etc. No, the question is, are you or your girlfriend ready to get into this type of commitment?

If you still insist of taking that track however, why not marry her instead? I mean, you were oh so willing to make her pregnant. Well then, this means you're ready to settle down with her. Don't take the backdoor, make it legal. But to impregnate your girlfriend just to keep her? Geez. :rolleyes:

Anyway, the best way to keep her is to make sure that she loves you as much as you love her.

Rave81, you seem to be a guy very much in love with your girlfriend. But my friend, the most important thing for a long-distance relationship to work out is to ensure that both parties are committed in making the relationship work. That means, lots of hard work and some money. Both parties have to do their best to make it successful.

First, you'd have to trust each other. Because you're in two different countries, it's useless to worry about the other every time. And I assure you, given the distance, am sure there will be doubts. So it's important that doubt isn't given a chance in the relationship. Be extra-sweet with each other, and constantly reassure each other that your feelings are still going strong despite the distance.

Invest in some high-tech gizmos. Use the internet, webcam, MSN, whatever... but keep in contact with each other. Angelise is right, even if you're not together, you don't have to grow apart. Find where you can buy cheaper international phone cards and take turns to call each other to save on costs. Keep the romanticism by writing snail mails one time or the other. Send "care" packages just because. And never forget each other's birthday's and anniversaries.

Set a date when you can see each other again. I'm in a long-distance relationship too, and I know how frustrating it can be when you don't know when you'll see each other again. At least, set a general time when you'll visit the Philippines again or when she can go and visit you. But make sure you keep the date.

Lots of prayers and hard work... but if you love each other, I believe that long-distance relationships can happen. Hope this helps! Good luck! :*)

kelly_ganda

this advice will surely help:) nice one raventina. u've said it all. bravo!:)

Memnoch10

hmmmmmm...let us put it this way, I left May 11, 2003. It's been a hard and long two years (almost), but I wouldn't trade it for anything else. Mahirap, that I admit, but if the love is true then it will hold. It's not nearly as hard as it sounds if you guys trust each other and there would be at least one way of communicating with each other. I call almost every monthsarry namin and an extended call during her birthday and anniv namin, in between we rely on chat, webcam, and voice chat. Kahit saan, kahit kailan, at kahit sino ka man eh there would always be a huge amount of temptation that would come your way. As a guy we cannot help but look, stare pa nga ng todo minsan, but it is up to you and your level of love if you would do more than just look or not. Nakakabaliw ang LDR pero if the question is "is it doable?" YES "impossible?" NO "hard?" HELL YEAH but in the end I know that it is going to be worth the wait. True love comes at us once in our lifetime, and it would suck big time if you lose that person just because of the thing we call distance.

meteora

Memnoch10 wrote:

hmmmmmm...let us put it this way, I left May 11, 2003. It's been a hard and long two years (almost), but I wouldn't trade it for anything else. Mahirap, that I admit, but if the love is true then it will hold. It's not nearly as hard as it sounds if you guys trust each other and there would be at least one way of communicating with each other. I call almost every monthsarry namin and an extended call during her birthday and anniv namin, in between we rely on chat, webcam, and voice chat. Kahit saan, kahit kailan, at kahit sino ka man eh there would always be a huge amount of temptation that would come your way. As a guy we cannot help but look, stare pa nga ng todo minsan, but it is up to you and your level of love if you would do more than just look or not. Nakakabaliw ang LDR pero if the question is "is it doable?" YES "impossible?" NO "hard?" HELL YEAH but in the end I know that it is going to be worth the wait. True love comes at us once in our lifetime, and it would suck big time if you lose that person just because of the thing we call distance.

Very well said...it's true that if a person is in another country, it's so easy to find lots...and I mean LOTS of beautiful, sexy girls...and same goes with the other party. It's so easy to put up a list...pero it doesn't matter if you call everyday, chat or text...or visit each other so often...it doesn't have to be expensive... it's not your obligation to keep in touch often... even if you have the so-called TRUST...of course it helps pero normal lang naman yan eh during the first stages na nagkalayo kayo...madaling sabihin na may Trust kayo sa isa't isa ... pero to maintain that TRUST, it all depends on how TRUE is your love sabi nga ni Memnoch... kung hindi pa "mature" yung love nyo, there's no guarantee na it will hold.... so sabi nga rin ng isa..kailangan sabayan mo ng maraming prayers...

hael76

i am currently in a long distance relationship with my fiance in Australia. it's tough. we've been together for 9 months now and we still manage to talk to each other everyday! thanks to skype.

i think if you're really committed to each other and are willing to make this thing work, then it IS doable. you just have to be honest with each other always. if somehow, along the way, you fell out of love for the other, be upfront about it and don't keep the other person hanging on. mas masakit yun! :(

eanair

memnoch 10, naiyak naman ako sa post mo. Na-comfort na rin. I, too, am in a long distance relationship, pero medyo iba nga lang yung situation ko. Andyan sa pilipinas ang BF ko, friend sya ng friend ko. We were introduced, became textmates, e-mail mates (or whatever you call it), then phone pals. Nahulog yung loob namin sa isa't isa. The relationship is new, but we started out as good friends. we survive in daily text, chat, weekly phone calls and e-mails. Next year pa kami magkikita, kasi nest year pa ko pwedeng umuwi. Napakahirap, pero I can't bear life without him kahit na long distance pa. dinadaan na lang namin sa dasal.

babyloves_78

WoW! dami din pala talaga nasa LDR situation noh.. hay ang hirap. kami ng bf ko 7 years na pero ngayon lang kami nagkalayo ng ganito. its been 3 months na magkalayo kami. sabi nya he'll be back after a year. well, hope matuloy ang plano nya lahat para sa amin. sa totoo lang ngayon nababaliw ako kasi wala syang net so d kami maka chat. eh nagtitipid naman sya sa txt! hayy nababaliw na talaga ako.. wala pa ako makausap kahit kaibigan man lang... :(

kikoy

Trust plus phone sex or cyber sex just to maintain the heat and imtimacy.

Just being practical.

baby_07

Trust each other. No matter what.

hoop_master

tingin ko, habang nagse-set kayo ng guidelines, mas masasakal ang bawat isa. mas aatake ang guilt pag sa palagay mo e umiiba na ang direksyon nyo na naaayon sa guidelines nyo.

ang suggestion ko na lang e to keep the communication line open (email, text, snail mail, phone call). mahirap man at matrabaho pero sulit

maxieGRL

hehehe...i wana be a devil's advocate here.

here's a tip for those in an LDR...DONT CHEAT ON YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER...but if it happens, please dont get caught.:rotflmao:

kwins

5 mos to be exact na mula nung bumalik sya sa US.And were not really committed to each other coz mahirap magkaroon ng commitment.But the good thing sa relationship namin hes always have time to chat before going to work and always make it a point na makakatawag sya sakin once a week.Mahirap kasi madami kaming pinagsamahan sa 7 days(yeah only 7 days) na pagstay nya d2.Pero i think the best way to survive a long distance relationship is what you call the "circle of trust" .

baklita

gamitin mo lahat ng paraan pra mag-correspond kyo sa isa't isa...
phone, text, e-mail, letter, etc... but keep an open mind. you may
or may not succeed in the end. maraming mangyayari mula sa di nyo
pagkikita at sa muling pagkikita.

ang katanungan... could love, long sacrifice and fidelity prevail on your side?

aihihihi!!!

baklita

try_again

rave81 wrote:

well, sad to say next yr on the month of March or April im about to leave this country and migrate to australia, and i made a promise to my gf il return for her, i really love her so much, right now we are already 7 months, i hope wish can wait for me, so peps can you post ur guidelines how to survive the "Long distance rela",

break it off whie yu still can.

Sympatico

constant communiction, enough trust and enough love. u dont need so much love. just enough.

janelle11

u know wat... aside from the constant communication, trust, prayers, thos wat u call "mature love" here'e one very important key also... HONESTY! u shud always be open, NEVER hide anything that may become a bad sign of ur relatonship! And stay away from temptations, and plz. no risks!!!! coz' it's gonna get hard na.. im also experiencing tha same.. LDR rin kami nang guy ko, he's at the phil. it's been three months na.. and it rili is harder than anything... though we always remind ach other... we are always openbet. each other ofcourse.. and We always UPDATE on each other for what has been goin around with our live.. to keep away from the risks...

However...It is inevitable at times that there will be temptation and challenges that'll come ur wayz... and that's how you'll know how strong your love is. GUD LUCK!!!!

Be wise enough in ur decisions and actions... and if u truly love the person "NEVER LET GO!"

that's what we always say to each other "never let go"

coz' it's hard na.. i cudnt ever commit the same mistake again of letting him go... we always pray talaga... hehehe.... we don't care if things get corny at times... hay LOVE is corny...
we would rili do evreything to survive in this situation we are in...
and if ever we may notice that temptations are lurking on.. well u know wat to do! mind over matters also...
immediately we let each other know and just be 100% in everything.. TRUST, HONESTY, and all the essential ingredients to keep ur status strong....

again... Gud luck! i know u both can withstand everything!

baklita

ldr din kami...

ako nga ay nasa malayo... nagulat ako nang bigla syang
nagpakita sa akin... in real flesh!

hay naku... nilakad nya ang 3 kilometro pra laang makipagkita
sakin... how sweet!

aihihihi!!!

baklita