PEx Highlights

Big Hero 6 Pins!

New movie pin alert! Join the movie discussion thread and collect all five Big Hero 6 pins!

read more

Follow @pinoyexchange on Twitter

Be in the know! Follow @pinoyexchange on Twitter for community, movies, sports and promo updates.

read more

PROMO: The Book of Life

Join the promo and get a chance to win exclusive The Book of Life merchandise!

read more

REVIEW: The Judge

Robert Downey Jr. takes off his iron suit and stars in this legal drama. Read our review here!

read more

Top Female Celebrities

2 more weeks and she will officially be the IT GIRL of the month. Can her fans keep it up? Jane Oineza is still PEx's Top Female Celeb!

read more

PHOTOS: Aguilar, Ginebra Bully Talk N Text

Ginebra had no problems in their opening campaign after a 101-81 win over TNT. Japeth Aguilar proved to be too much for the Texters with his game-high 18pts, 18rebs and 5 blks.

read more

Page 1 of 3 1 2 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 59
  1. #1
    This was emailed to me. Sobrang funny!

    1. NAP GUTIERREZ INTERVIEWING MANILYN REYNES IN MOVIE MAGAZINE
    NAP: Saan ka movie outfit nakakontrata?
    MANILYN: So far, hindi ko naman pinoproblema ang mga wardrobes ko kasi
    ex-deal naman eh.

    2. JULLIE YAP DAZA GUESTING ON VILMA!
    JULLIE: O Vi nag-guest na ko dito sa show. Ikaw,kailan ka naman mag-ge-guest sa show ko?
    VILMA : Alam mo naman Tita Jullie, busy kami ni Ralph sa pag-a-arrange ng kasal namin. Siguro pagkatapos na lang ng marriage!

    3. If I were to compare the stars of my era with the star discoveries of Dr. Rey delaCruz,it would be like placing the Taj Majal of India side by side with a Volkswagen. * CELIA RODRIGUEZ

    4. RITA GOMEZ AS A JUDGE IN A BB. PILIPINAS PAGEANT, ASKING A CANDIDATE A
    QUESTION DURING THE Q AND A (CANDIDATE INCIDENTALLY IS MARIA ISABEL LOPEZ)
    RITA: Here's your question, hija: Are you still a virgin?
    MARIA ISABEL: If I say I still am, can I bring home the crown tonight?
    RITA: Good answer!
    MARIA ISABEL: What about you Ma'am, are you still a virgin?
    RITA: Hija I have 5 children with 5 different fathers,what do you call
    that, Immaculate Conception???

    5. Ang ganda ng gospel number na yon, napaka-enlighting. Teka magpupunas lang ako, I'm sweatening.*VILMA SANTOS

    6. Thank you, Lucky for the flowers...where did they came from? *VILMA SANTOS

    7. Being Miss Universe is like having a birthstone, you may lose it. Being
    a Filipina is like having a birthmark, it's forever. *MARGIE MORAN DURING THE Q AND A PORTION OF THE 1973 MISS UNIVERSE, ASKED WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BEING MISS UNIVERSE AND BEING A FILIPINA

    8. Salamat po sa Board of Judges. Ito na ho yata ang pinakamaligaya kong pasko at manigong bagong taon sa inyong lahat. * MELANIE MARQUEZ'S ACCEPTANCE SPEECH FOR WINNING BEST ACTRESS IN A METRO FILMFEST

    9. Successful naman ang libing ng nanay ko. *BABETTE VILLARUEL

    10. "Sa tingin ko ang pinaka-asset ko sa mukha ko ay ugali!Mabait kasi ako
    eh" *MR. POGI CONTESTANT'S ANSWER TO THE QUESTION: ANO SA MUKHA MO ANG PINAKA-ASSET MO?

    DURING THE PARADE OF CONTESTANTS
    11. Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen! I am Ma. Rosario Liboon, I come from the beautiful city of Pangasinan...City! *SHE'S GOT THE LOOK CONTESTANT

    12. Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen! I am Carmelita HErnandez, I come from Pasay City and I want to be a medicine! *ANOTHER SHE'S GOT THE LOOK CONTESTANT DURING THE PARADE OF CONTESTANTS

    13. BOY A: O Melanie, do you have any message to your mother-in-law in case
    nanonood siya ngayon!
    MELANIE: You know what Kuya Boy, I have to speak in English cause she cannot understand Tagalog. "You know what Mrs. Dee...I've long been wanting to tell you this... Ang labo mo!"

    14. EDU: So who's to blame?
    VILMA: Excuse me, it's not my fault anymore. It's your fault anymore!

    15. OVERHEARD FROM A GIRL NA GALIT SA KARARATING NA BOYFRIEND SA STARBUCKS.
    GIRL : My God you're so late. Where did you...Where have you...Where do you... saan ka ba galing???

    16. HOST : WHICH DO YOU PREFER: BLONDE OR DUMB?
    GIRL : DUMB NA LANG AT LEAST HINDI AKO MAPAGKAKAMALANG BLONDE!

    17.DESSA AFTER SINGING A SPOT NUMBER IN A REGINE VELASQUEZ CONCERT. DESSA APPARENTLY SANG A VERY VOCALLY CHALLENGING SONG AND AS EXPECTED, ENDED iT WITH A THROAT BREAKING NOTE. REGINE ENTERS.
    DESSA : O kala mo ikaw lang ang mataas ang boses.Kaya mo yun?
    REGINE : Eh ano ngayon, maganda ka ba?

    18. SABRINA M. MAKES TARAY TO OSANG IN A TALK SHOW.
    SABRINA M: At least hindi naman ako katulad ng iba diyan na retokado ang boobs.
    OSANG : Hoy Sabrina, oo nga itong boobs ko retokado. Pero at least ang ngipin ko hindi pustiso tulad ng sa yo! Ooops huwag kang magagalit baka malaglag yan sa sahig!

    19. "I am inviting all the televiewers to watch our movie "14 Going Steady" on the twenty-twoth of November...." (HAY NAKU, O SIYA....) -Nadia Montenegro

    20. "Sana po'y panoorin natin ang The Life Story Of Julie Vega...alam kong masaya si Julie ngayon dahil it's just around the corner. (GAWIN DAW BANG CHRISTMAS SPIRIT SI JULIE?) -Nadia Montenegro

    21. "I am not an addict. I am the victims!" (WALA TALAGA SIYANG PAGOD,NO?)-Melanie Marquez

    22. Host: "Ano ba ang pinaka-favorite mong movie lately, Melanie?"
    Melanie:"Maganda yung kay Emma Thompson at Kate Winslet, yung "Simple and Simplicity".

    23. "Magandang Tanghali po, ako po si Luzviminda Cortez mula sa Camarines
    Sur, sumalangit na po ang inyong kaluluwa!" -Miss Gay Philippines
    candidate during the parade of candidates

    24. RITA GOMEZ: Good evening, Elvira!
    ELVIRA MANAHAN: It was! What's your business here?
    RITA GOMEZ: It was plain business until the monkey came.
    -Rita Gomez guesting on Two for the Road with Elvira Manahan and Nestor
    Torre

    25. Ladies and gentlemen let's all welcome Miss Sheryl Cruz! -Martin Nievera
    presenting Ruffa Gutierrez with this intro on Martin After Dark

    26. Ladies and gentlemen, take it away with Miss Jean Saburat! - Joe Quirino
    presenting Jean Saburit with this intro on Seeing Stars with JQ

  2. #2
    LOL CaRaMBa, I enjoyed that!

  3. #3
    Oh my goddess! Totoo ba lahat yan????

  4. #4
    How howlarious! Almost fell off the couch - tsaka sumakit ang tiyan ko sa katatawa - muntik 'kong kabagan!

    Luvdit! Anymore?

  5. #5
    Ehehehe, nice to hear that you guys enjoyed that. But that's the only one I have. To everyone, feel free to post more bloopers.

  6. #6
    Old school smackdown layer The Rock's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 1999
    Location
    Oa
    Nice one CaRaMBa!

  7. #7
    That was funny Carambs! Look at my face, i'm laughing right now -->; ...hehe.

  8. #8
    grabeh, ha!! i'm laughtering ryt now!!! hahaha!!! joke lang...

    ! peace out...

    grabeh.. hilarious.. we want more!!! funny!!!

    aliw naman ako kay Osang and Sabrina M!! pati kay Regine and Dessa!!! magtarayan daw ba!!! hahaha

  9. #9
    LOL kakatawa!

    Ako may dagdag, as far as I know they are all true:

    During a beauty contest: When asked what her best asset was, Melanie Marquez replied, "My long-legged."

    A Bb. Filipina contestant was asked by Apa Ongpin which of the five senses she could do without, she answered "my eyes." Apa asked, why her eyes? She replied, "Because I've got beautiful eyes." (with matching sultry look)

    When asked what place in the Philippines she would boast about, Calendar girl contestant replied: "Bocaue" Intrigued hosts ask, "What about Bocaue? What's in it to boast about?" Girl replied: "Why, the Bocaue rice terraces of course."

    A reporter complimented Mark Anthony Fernandez: "Mark Anthony, ang cute cute mo, you've got rosy cheeks just like your mom!" To which he replied: "Syempre, it runs to the blood e." (I've repeated this joke so many times it's become second nature to me to say 'it runs to the blood', argh!)

  10. #10
    Just received another email. Bastos nga lang, so careful, careful!

    MOVIES THEY WOULDN'T SHOW IN PINOY BLOCKBUSTER CHANNEL:

    Umaga Na Nang Hinugot (Ang Kurdon Ng Plantsa)

    Lulunin Mo Kung Mahal Mo Ako (Ang Lahat Ng Pasakit)

    Lumandi Ka, Lola

    Ang Tikoy Masarap

    Ang Tikoy, Matigas Na

    Kagatin Mo ang Biko

    Ang Sumo'y Mabigat

    Agiw Lang Ang Pagitan

    Bata, Bata, Gawa Tayong Bata!

    Mabuteng Kabute

    Mabulunan Man Ako

    [This message has been edited by CaRaMBa (edited 03-03-2000).]

  11. #11
    da cranky ferret!
    Join Date
    Nov 1999
    Location
    Kingdom of Pretty
    dagdag...!!!

    1. melanie marquez and boy abunda:

    boy: o melanie, paano na ang showbiz career mo ngayong nagmo-mormon ka na?
    melanie: a okay lang yan boy kasi matagal na rin akong semi-retarded.


    2. super sireyna contest:

    emcee: anong masasabi mo sa death penalty?
    bading; a ano po yun toot por toot, eye por eye.
    emcee: paki-eksplika nga?
    bading: ganito po yun: kung pinatay mo ang nanay ko, dapat, patayin din ang nanay mo!


    3. little miss phiippines contest

    emcee: anong gusto mong maging paglaki mo? little miss contestant: maging lalaki po.


    4. little miss phiippines contest

    emcee (to boy consort, inaalaska): okay 'tong suot mo boy, a!
    boy consort: 'TANG INA MO!


    5. mr. world philippines contest

    emcee: what do you think should a man possess to be successful?
    contestant: i think, that for a man to be successful, he should be a responsible, because if he should not be a responsible, he will not have a successful. that is all. i thank you.


    6. kuya germs, interviewing the boygroup, 98 degrees

    kuya germs: are you already married?
    98 member: no, i'm still single.
    kuya: WOW! imagine that! what a koynseedense! three years ago, you are here, you are single. i am here, i am single. now, three years after, you are still here, you are still single. i am still here, i am still single! it's anbeeleebabol!


    7. hetero talent scout, sighting a super gorgeous girl, and trying to score points

    talent scout: excuse me. are you a commercial?
    (after five milliseconds and realizing booboo). model?

    the weird part of this story is that, kumagat ang girl. at magsyota na sila ni mr. booboo. baka mas malala pa ingles ni girl kasi.


    8. leonardo litton and rodel velayo, guesting on keep on dancing

    charlene gonzales: hi leonardo, hi rodel, welcome to keep on dancing!
    leonardo litton: welcome din po!


    9. boy abunda and anabel rama

    boy: anabel, anong masasabi mo sa mga insinuation ni isabel, na para bang, bugaw ka?
    anabel: eekskyus me no, buuy!!?? kaldiro lang ang binibinta ko nuun, sa istayts!!! hinde ako nagbibinta ng pikpik!!!


    10. TV patrol coverage by JV Villar, of an old and ugly transvestite hooker, CANDY, reporting to police the alleged homicide attack on him/her by SAID ALAA, a Palestinian "client." This was shot just outside Said's prison cell, and Saad and Candy are standing side by side.

    Candy: But him and me, we are already decisioning. That I will decision to not anymore demand a case to him.
    (off-cam voice): paano mangyayari na hindi mo na siya kakasuhan.
    Candy: That him and me, he will marry me.

    Natawa na lang si Saad at dumeretso sa selda niya.

    11. Eat Bulaga husband and wife compatability contest (a la New Married game)

    Host: Misis, ano ang nilalagay ni Mister sa kanyang itlog tuwing umaga??
    Misis: Johnson's Baby Powder!

  12. #12
    grabeh, Caramba! you are didding it again!!!

  13. #13
    nerd forever
    Join Date
    Jul 1999
    Location
    Metro_Manila
    Isang contribution...

    Seen and Heard on Lunch Date...

    Randy Santiago: I would like to thank Monakiki for my clothes. Sa Monakiki, may Mona ka na...

    (Ruffa Guttierrez butts in)
    May Kiki ka pa!
    (She realizes her blooper and gives the mike to somebody)

  14. #14
    LOL@Jacob and Caramba!

    Here, I made this booboo myself on radio:
    LINE TO BE READ: Gupitin ang titik at isalin sa champagne goblet.
    LINE AS READ BY THE GENIUS DJ TRYING TO READ IN FILIPINO: Well, just take the only "K" out of that sentence and you get my drift.

    The worst part was, I started laughing and couldn't stop for about two minutes. Helen and I were dying on-air.

  15. #15

    Talking

    advise to Melanie Marquez:
    Don't English anymore.!!!!
    http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif

  16. #16
    Every Body's Buddy BabyFATS's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2000
    Location
    where the heart is

    Talking

    This is so hilarious... I double over laughing. Talagang mega- http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif

    Nice one, CaRaMBa!

  17. #17

    Talking

    hahaha!

  18. #18
    Live Life Simply ! mytyragirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2000
    Location
    Metro_Manila

    Talking

    Just heard this one this morning on the tv program Unang Hirit.

    OneMig Bondoc is being interviewd by Ametess Dira (tama ba? )regarding his morning routine.

    Ametess: Onemig, what is the first thing you do in the morning?

    Onemig: Of course, I go to the bathroom, BRUSH MY TOOTH, .............

    http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif

  19. #19
    sun-shiney day!
    Join Date
    Dec 1999
    Location
    Metro_Manila

    Talking

    another melanie marquez story... ininterview siya sa isang showbiz talk show sa ch 7 and was asked about the case she filed against her ex-lover/husband (whatever!). she accused him of sexually harrasing her daughter. medyo convincing na siya kasi may paiyak-iyak pa siya until she said something like "dinala ko na nga yung anak ko sa MEDICOLEDAD..." http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif sobrang tawang-tawa ako kasi i saw it na lang during the tigbak awards nung show wherein they give out awards to crazy things like that.

    eto pa, nakwento lang sa akin ng friend ko nung isang araw na pinagtatawanan namin yung mga papogian na contest (yung mga tipong MR. POGI, DOBOL NI IDOL...) it was during the presentation of the contestants. one by one magsasalita sila at magpapakilala...
    CONTESTANT: my father said gwapo raw ako! my mother said pogi raw ako! kayo, what did you said?

    isa pa, kwento lang ulit ng friend ko. it was during one of cristy fermin's cristy-per-minute...
    CRISTY: presenting miss SHA-INA TWAHYN!!!
    nasanay siguro siya sa pag-present kay shaina magdayao...

    eto kanina lang sa episode ng FLAMES...
    RICA: its true!!! i saw it with my very own two eyes!!!
    (ha?!?! ah eh... ilan ba mata mo? madami pa ba sa 2? magaadlib lang mali pa...)

    yaaaaks... nahahalata pagkabaduy ko ah... lahat ng nasabi kong shows puros kabaduyan...

  20. #20
    nvr bn happier
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    a sorta fairytale

    Talking

    CaRaMBa: grabe po. pinatatawa po ninyo ako... nagmumukha tuloy akong ***** rito sa comp lab... http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif galing po ito kay chuck mathay??? http://www.pinoyexchange.com/lol.gif (joke lang po!!!)... sana friends tayo!!

    [This message has been edited by cultured pearls (edited 09-06-2000).]

Page 1 of 3 1 2 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Hot Topics

PBA:

GlobalPort bows to NLEX after fourth quarter collapse, 101-96

GlobalPort bows to NLEX after fourth quarter collapse, 101-96

read more
SHOWBIZ:

What do you make of John Lloyd Cruz' performance in The Trial?

What do you make of John Lloyd Cruz' performance in The Trial?

read more
TRAVEL:

No bidets, rude staff and poor internet. What are your other hotel pet peeves?

No bidets, rude staff and poor internet. What are your other hotel pet peeves?

read more
CHIT CHAT:

Unzip your man purse and share what's inside your kikoy kit!

Unzip your man purse and share what's inside your kikoy kit!

read more
SPORTS:

2014 Philippine Superliga Grand Prix opens

2014 Philippine Superliga Grand Prix opens

read more
NMFtv:

NBA 2K15 Exhibition Gameplay - Washington Wizards VS Los Angeles Clippers on PS4

NBA 2K15 Exhibition Gameplay - Washington Wizards VS Los Angeles Clippers on PS4

read more