Why is the Philippine society accepting of a man's infidelity

[xctrekker]

The topic reminds me of this childhood story.

My parents tell me that before the war, the old Italian parish priest in our hometown once gave his observation in a sermon. He said that there are quite a number of men in our town who come to him to confess that they are having affairs. But he said, he doesn't remember any of the local women confessing to him that they are involved in affairs. That got him really puzzled. In his fluent Tagalog, he asked the Sunday congregation something like this: "Who are these men having affairs with- dogs and cats?"

Well times have changed and today it's probably easier for women to admit to their infidelities.

[ermonski]

or maybe doing "negative things" contributes to a male's bad-assery? lol

[obesepornstar]

It's a MALE DOMINATED SOCIETY

Since the times of Lapu-Lapu men were in charge. Rajah & Lakandula (commonly had many wives)...And what about women's roles? To stay in the house, care for the children, do housework etc... This may have been passed on and also don't get me started on when the Spaniards came (men really dominated) could Maria Clara go to school? No! She was raped by a priest and later died in a convent. And I think feminism is not very pronounced in the Phillippines in countries like the U.S. or even Canada women fought for it. But even so, we cannot deny that man still dominates that is why they're let off the hook easily.

[mrbones525]

But if you would notice, the fathers are always very protective of their daughters because they know how cunning the predators are out there.



If ever I will have a daughter, I will teach her not to trust men and get a good education and learn some combat sports and do some piano lessons.

lalaki kakalabasan niyan haha

[Nils]

Yun nga. They can dahil because they don't suffere the consequence of their action.

problema kasi dito... bakit pati kung sinong pwedeng ikama ng tao eh pinakikialaman ng society... going to bed with somebody is a personal choice, whether a person decided to do it because of emotions, fulfilling a business transaction or simple call of nature, wala ng pakialam ang ibang tao dun... basta walang pwersahan at nasa tamang pag-iisip ang nagkama sa isa't isa, bahala na sila sa buhay nila.

[kensamor]

problema kasi dito... bakit pati kung sinong pwedeng ikama ng tao eh pinakikialaman ng society... going to bed with somebody is a personal choice, whether a person decided to do it because of emotions, fulfilling a business transaction or simple call of nature, wala ng pakialam ang ibang tao dun... basta walang pwersahan at nasa tamang pag-iisip ang nagkama sa isa't isa, bahala na sila sa buhay nila.

Not if they are married. It is not only against the morality but it is against the law. If they guy is not committed to anyone and he wants to sleep around, that's his problem, not anyone else's.

[Nils]

Not if they are married. It is not only against the morality but it is against the law. If they guy is not committed to anyone and he wants to sleep around, that's his problem, not anyone else's.

Again, why should you decide when a guy can and cannot sleep around? It's his ****, it's the decision of the person he is putting it inside and it is his relationship/marriage. Dapat ba may approval ng lahat ng kapitbahay kung pwede kang umiyot o hindi?

[ututina]

hindi worth ng time magmukmuk.

[kensamor]

Again, why should you decide when a guy can and cannot sleep around? It's his ****, it's the decision of the person he is putting it inside and it is his relationship/marriage. Dapat ba may approval ng lahat ng kapitbahay kung pwede kang umiyot o hindi?

No, anyone can decide for themselves but like I said there's consequences because there's a law prohibiting adultery. Hindi ka naman kailangang magpaalam kung jejerjer ka ng kahit sino. But wag kang aangal kung merong tumaas ang kilay. There's no such thing as absolute freedom ano? Bakit kasi puro na lang karapatan ang pinagtutuunan natin ng pansin? How about responsibilities towards your spouse and children? Hindi ba naman dapat isipin ang effect ng extra-curricular activities sa mga mahal mo sa buhay (wag na isipin ang kapitbahay)? Kasi minsan, the government has to intervene kasi merong mga individual hindi marunong mag-isip.

[Kray0n]

Again, why should you decide when a guy can and cannot sleep around? It's his ****, it's the decision of the person he is putting it inside and it is his relationship/marriage. Dapat ba may approval ng lahat ng kapitbahay kung pwede kang umiyot o hindi?

cause it's not his relationship/marriage alone. you cannot be in a relationship by yourself.

btw, no one is actually controlling anyone here. i don't think people ask for approval before they cheat.

[Kray0n]

...going to bed with somebody is a personal choice, whether a person decided to do it because of emotions, fulfilling a business transaction or simple call of nature, wala ng pakialam ang ibang tao dun...

by default, when you are with someone, it's definitely not about just you anymore. even more so if you have a kid. same thing with having parents, friends, etc.

and actions have consequences, that should surprise no one.

[infinite_trial]

saan ka pa, e kung nga yung mga artista tulad ni Dolphy saka mga politicians na madaming kabit at anak sa labas...sa atin lang ata garapalan ang magcheat sa asawa. sa ibang bansa pa nga discreet pa sila e.

kung may divorce, may choice ang babae na makapag-move on at makapagsimula ulit. sa pex dilemmas pa lang madami ng cases na gustong iwan ni babae kaso walang pera pang annul, pangbuhay ng mga anak niya, mahirap na makahanap ng work dahil matagal nang housewife.

naalala ko tuloy yung co-worker ko na panay ang yabang niya about his conquests pero married na siya. lol ewan ko kung totoo lahat yun pero everytime na tatanungin ko siya about esmi niya parang under-the-saya ang dating.

[invi]

Sus pa-machohan kasi ang labanan dito. Para bang pag kuntento na ang isang lalake sa isang babae eh hindi na siya macho at luging-lugi siya sa dami ng ibang babae diyan. Yung ibang babae naman payag na number 2 lang sila.

[xctrekker]

saan ka pa, e kung nga yung mga artista tulad ni Dolphy saka mga politicians na madaming kabit at anak sa labas...sa atin lang ata garapalan ang magcheat sa asawa. sa ibang bansa pa nga discreet pa sila e.

kung may divorce, may choice ang babae na makapag-move on at makapagsimula ulit. sa pex dilemmas pa lang madami ng cases na gustong iwan ni babae kaso walang pera pang annul, pangbuhay ng mga anak niya, mahirap na makahanap ng work dahil matagal nang housewife.

naalala ko tuloy yung co-worker ko na panay ang yabang niya about his conquests pero married na siya. lol ewan ko kung totoo lahat yun pero everytime na tatanungin ko siya about esmi niya parang under-the-saya ang dating.

Depends on the country. Sa US the revelation of an affair can derail a candidate's Presidential bid (ex. Gary Hart) or scandalize a sitting President (ex. Clinton). But yes, they try to be discreet.

Its different in France. During the Lewinsky affair, a French expat in our office said that a brouhaha like that will never happen in France. For them, if an official devotes his heart & head to faithfully carrying out his duties to France & its people, then all is well. The mistress(es) can have everything below the waist. And yes, they also try to be discreet.

As to your bragging co-worker, maraming ganyan. Pa-macho effect pero compensating mechanism lang nila yung pagkwento ng exploits nila kasi isang sutsot lang ng misis tiklop na sila. Kadalasan puro fiction lang kwento ng mga yan.

[jazzmine22]

kung may divorce, may choice ang babae na makapag-move on at makapagsimula ulit. sa pex dilemmas pa lang madami ng cases na gustong iwan ni babae kaso walang pera pang annul, pangbuhay ng mga anak niya, mahirap na makahanap ng work dahil matagal nang housewife.

True, kaya nga dapat lahat ng babae, hindi umaasa lang financially sa mga asawa nila, dapat magkaroon sila ng sariling source of income, para mambabae, at hindi mo na ma-take, madali mong iwanan, kasi kaya mong buhayin ang sarili mo, at ang mga anak mo.

Karamihan naman ng mga pumapayag magkabit ng magkabit ang mga asawa nila, eh yung nakasandal lang sa mga asawa nila, eh hindi naisip, kaya nga malakas ang loob na lokohin ka, at ang mga anak mo, dahil alam niyang no choice ka, kundi tanggapin or else hindi ka makakatayo sa sarili mong mga paa.

Kung weak kang babae, your husband will always take you for granted.

[aislinn]

dunno, people don't really stop talking.
it's a pretty good assumption that she'll find out, even indirectly.

and yeah, she'll be judged either way, definitely. the guy too. how harshly the guy is judged? well it's up to how women react when cheated on. in the end, it's up to them to keep quiet or take action. people will know about it either way anyway.

Ah yes, but again, the premise is between men who cheat and women who cheat and how society reacts to their infidelities. It's not about how society treats the woman scorned.

Society is more forgiving when it comes to men cheating on their spouses but not too forgiving when a woman does the same. Hence, the double standard.

[Alpha_Green]

kung may divorce, may choice ang babae na makapag-move on at makapagsimula ulit. sa pex dilemmas pa lang madami ng cases na gustong iwan ni babae kaso walang pera pang annul, pangbuhay ng mga anak niya, mahirap na makahanap ng work dahil matagal nang housewife.

Pero ka KABUTIHANG PALAD, wala pang divorce sa Pinas. Thank you Catholic Church.

(no sarcasm in there, I really mean it)

[pangasar]

Kasi, HIPOKRITO ang PILIPINAS pagdating sa isyung ganto. Pinanindigan ang "The only country without Divorce Law". Dahil sa Catholic centered daw ang Pinas, makasalanan at imoral ang Divorce pero ok lang mangabit.

[ututina]

there are some things that you just accept but don't have to tolerate. it's much worse to tolerate but not accept.

[jazzmine22]

Pero diba may law ang Pilipinas, na kapag 7 years or more kayong hindi nagkita ng asawa mo, considered pwede ka ng mag-asawa ng iba?

Kahit walang divorce, huwag ka na lang magpakita ng 7 years, LOL.