Why is the Philippine society accepting of a man's infidelity

[Papichulo168]

Pag ang lalaki nakabuntis ng ibang babae sa labas ng kasal, hindi kasing apektado ang babaeng asawa dahil if ever, yung lalake naman bubuhay doon sa magiging anak niya sa labas. However, ang babaeng nag cheat maaring patuloy niyang lolokohin ang asawa niya kung nabuntis siya ng ibang lalake at maaring yung asawa niya ang bumuhay at magpalaki sa batang akala niya sarili niyang anak.

[lockex]

Stuck kasi tayo sa 60s view dito. Nuod kayo ng Mad Men, parang ganun yung ideal guy ng bawat pinoy.

[despisePappus]

In my personal opinion though, I'd rather have my father cheat on my mother over my my mother cheating on my father.

I can hate my father but forgive him in the end, and perpetually hate the other woman.

But I can't see myself hating on my mother because she did it. It will cause a greater trauma on us.

As I've said, mas mahirap sa mga babae na mabansagang sawsawan ng bayan. They will lose the respect of the society.


=======


It is said here that the society accepts this double standard, for a good reason in my belief.

However you failed to take into account that in any affected families, the one who wronged the family are most likely to be ostracized. I have seen a lot of such cases. Makati si lalaki, na-ban na siya ng kanyang mga anak. Sometimes the children and the spouses are forgiving, especially if the father is a good provider... but most of the times, they are not.

I am blessed to have a strong-willed mother.

[F-A Soldier]

I'd rather them not cheat on each other. I respect my dad and he's much more a man than I could ever be, but there's two situations I'd forget he's my father: he hits my mom and or he cheats on her. My fists would be legion all over his face. I could care less about so many women in the world, they could be treated like sh!t for all I care, but my mother I'd die first if I see her treated like that. But I think I'd die even more if not only was she victimized but took it and accepted it.

I'm proactive progressive and I believe in personal responsibility. Victims are victims because they are weak and let themselves become prey. There's no pity reserve to them; in fact I think in a dog eat dog world, they deserve it.

In this situation, not that I'm taking men out of the blame, but I'm putting women in charge of their fate. You can thin out the wolven population but you can't send out a hapless child on a road and expect her to return unharmed. Give her a shotgun and teach her jiujitsu and even if there are werewolf infestation she'd travel safe and sound.

Women are culturally and physically raised to be weak in a paternal society like the PI. Even with the progressive and democratic changes, culturally women are still weak and perpetuated so. Some stuff you just can't change. But it doesn't mean you'd let it run it's course.

If you're a parent of a girl, you have to raise properly. Give her education so she'd have a career and wouldn't be dependent on a man if push comes to shove. She won't take it in the a$$ if he's the sole provider and have to chose between self respect and or starvation of her children (if she decides to leave). Coin rules the world. We all work and bend over for the dollar. Education, self respect that leads to career, self sufficiency. Education hopefully also leads to some better choices in partners and perhaps lifestyle (she could have as much sex as she wants, as long as it's safe, she doesn't have to tied to circumstances---most women in the PI and other parts of the world are tied down by responsibilities of motherhood because of accidents of wedlock )

Even if it's a man's world, if you have self respect, and money to drop, and a career to fall back on no goddamnbody could tell you otherwise. Victims are victims because they made themselves prey.

[Meanie!!]

Hmmm I don't see this changing, ever. Men are viewed as hunters and women as prey.

There are willing preys(malalandi) and they are frowned upon by society because it's not the way they should act.

[kensamor]

Pag ang lalaki nakabuntis ng ibang babae sa labas ng kasal, hindi kasing apektado ang babaeng asawa dahil if ever, yung lalake naman bubuhay doon sa magiging anak niya sa labas. However, ang babaeng nag cheat maaring patuloy niyang lolokohin ang asawa niya kung nabuntis siya ng ibang lalake at maaring yung asawa niya ang bumuhay at magpalaki sa batang akala niya sarili niyang anak.

This boils down to lack of laws regarding accountability. Kung may mabuntis si lalake, he should be responsible for child support and the court system should make sure it is being followed kaso ang mga mambabatas kasi sa Pilipinas puro mga lalakeng matutulis kaya malabo pa sa sabaw ng pusit na maipatupad ang batas na nagpaparusa sa mga kaliwete.

At sana wag ikatwiran ng mga lalake na okay lang sa kanila dahil walang mawawala sa kanila. Napaka-selfish na katwiran nyan. It's not only hard for the wife but also for the kids. Kaya di ako nagtataka sa pababang moralidad ng bansa natin dahil ang mga bata ngayon nawawalan ng role model sa moralidad.

When I moved to Canada, na-surprise ako na yun palang mga normal Canadian families mataas ang standard sa moralidad, iba sa nakikita natin sa TV.

[ututina]

Gusto kasi ng lalaki sunod sunod lang mga babae kahit blatant unfairness na.

Magalit ka baka ikaw pa palayasin.

hindi nila tatanggapin mali nila at galit mo.

Just marry somene you truly care about and who cares about you too outside the bed.

[invi]

"It's a maaannn's world. It's a man's, man's, man's world."

Solution: raise strong daughters who wouldn't put up with that sh!t.

I second this. We women can fight it all we want, but it truly is a man's world out there. I say, don't fight it, but we should learn how to live and play around the men without making them feel emasculated (oops ) -- it's the only way we can survive. It's called 'finesse' and 'cunning'. I mean I hope I can master this in the long run hehe.

Kaya mas nakakatakot magkaroon ng anak na babae sa panahon ngayon. Some situations are very demoralizing to women it's no wonder so many young girls have low self-esteem nowadays. If I ever have a daughter, I will make sure me and her father will always teach her good morals and always uplift her self-esteem. Nasa pagpapalaki talaga ng tao yan.

[despisePappus]

But if you would notice, the fathers are always very protective of their daughters because they know how cunning the predators are out there.



If ever I will have a daughter, I will teach her not to trust men and get a good education and learn some combat sports and do some piano lessons.

[enaej426]

Philippine Law is weak when it comes to women's welfare.

It only caters to the Rich and famous.

[cyberfunk]

Kapag tumaas pa ang standard of living ng mga pinoy dadami pa yang ganyang kaso. I saw a documentary before and they had a survey. The only thing that's holding back most pinoy men from infidelity is economics. Many more wanted to but they just couldn't afford a mistress.

[Alpha_Green]

Hmmm I don't see this changing, ever.

Me too.....and that's all that matters!

The only thing that's holding back most pinoy men from infidelity is economics. Many more wanted to but they just couldn't afford a mistress.

I agree. I think most Pinoy men stick with their wives not because of love and all that romantic sh!t they show on tv, its because they simply do not have the money to find a mistress. Being loyal is not a voluntary choice because its really not in the DNA of men to stick with just one woman. Some men on the other hand can stick with just one woman in their lifetime but not have sex with just that one woman.


Ito nalang, alin sa dalawang ito kayo mas mahihiyang sabihin sa mga kaibigan/kamag-anak niyo.

1. Lalakero ang nanay ko
2. Babaero ang tatay ko

Kahit sabihin mo pang all for equality ka at open minded lahat ng kamag anak at kaibigan mo..... deep inside, alam mo mas kahiya hiyang pa din sabihin ang number 1.

[guantanamero99]

This thread title assumes too much. You must first lay the ground work for your assertion. Post links, cite facts, etc

You don't even have to be a lawyer to figure this out

[Meanie!!]

^ Bro, obserbahan mo nalang ang paligid, lalo na kung nasa Pilipinas ka. No need to complicate things.

[goat1230]

opinion on the thread title... written in a not so discreet manner:

kapag si lalake ay womanizer = cool

just look at Hayden Kho - idol ng mga chauvinists

kapag si mister ay loyal kay misis = under da saya..

I can't pinpoint why this mentality gives me the impression that men (pinoy men to be exact) are irresponsible.... hmmm.. I guess it has something to do with lack of "paninindigan". Also the pinoy mentality in which more irresponsible = cool

sa kabilang banda:

kapag naman si babae ang nangaliwa - you know the word.

then ego comes into picture, not only na nasaktan si mister sa pangangaliwa, nasaktan din ang kanyang ego dahil ipinagpalit sya ni misis sa isang _________ <- insert description here.

kapag naman si misis ay nalaman ang pangangaliwa ng kanyang mister, the society most of the times frown upon those misis na pinalayas si mister dahil again sa dahilan na "lalake yan, hindi mo na maiaalis yan" mentality, and would prefer those misis who dismissed the wrongdoings and kept the family whole kahit dysfunctional na turning a blind eye to the more important matters like financial, (ang perang ginagamit na pambababae ni mister ay pwede nang pang bayad ng project ni junior) and medical (nagka HIV si junior dahil hindi maingat si itay) and psychological (ayaw nang umuwi ni junior dahil si itay at si inay, laging nagbabasagang pinggan) damages.

again, I can't understand why pinoy men would rather choose to gamble with these situations and still pursue to have a mistress, ganun na ba talaga ka-irresponsable ang society? o sadyang mas superior si pototoy na walang utak kaysa sa ulo sa taas?


maybe i'm just being too opinionated

[goat1230]

having that said, hindi ko masisisi kung bakit uso sa ating mga pinay ang mail-ordered brides

[halcyone1]

Why are there gays then?

[goat1230]

^ I don't think experts had arrived to a conclusion yet

[ututina]

Hindi naman nakasalalay sa number of women or men who got you laid kung magiging masaya ka.

[ututina]

This thread title assumes too much. You must first lay the ground work for your assertion. Post links, cite facts, etc

You don't even have to be a lawyer to figure this out

bayaan mo sila sa assertion nila. bakit type mo ba mga yun? di naman diba eh hayaan mo na. hindi naman naten jowa mga yan para usisain STD nila

isang lalaki lang pwede magsabi sakin ng "it's my world" yung iba charush nalang!