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  1. #1

    Welcome Mat T-shirt

    Ever had the feeling that you're wearing a welcome mat t-shirt for so long?

    I just realized this recently with three instances involving relatives and friends.

    Case 1: A friend who seems forever in financial doldrums. I can rely on him to be at my front gate early in the morning every 15th to borrow money. Nagbabayad naman, yun nga lang ako pa pupunta sa kanya para kunin ang bayad. He fixes my scooter kaya ang payment bawas sa utang. Kaya ayun sira ang scooter ko ayoko nang ipaayos sa kanya. Ngayong 15th hindi napadaan. Nag-text. Kung pwede daw puntahan ko siya at wala daw siyang pang gas. Ayos!

    Case 2: An older relative who I've been helping out with odd jobs in her house. I fix the small toilet fixture issues and minor car issues so she could save money from hiring professional help for these chores. Alam niyang hindi ko siya matatanggihan sa mga ganung issues dahil ninang ko siya. Ngayon she's using those SOS signals to bait me to go there so she can borrow money. And wants me to drive her friend to Tagaytay this weekend. As in driver ako. Eating driver food and hanging around with family drivers. Ayos2!

    Case 3: A brother-in-law who thinks he's got all the answers to everything (opinionated). "Unfiltered" (his exact term) in telling what he feels about our side of the family. I wish I can be "unfiltered" with him and tell him he's a useless, ugly S.O.B. who's sure to kill himself if other people close to him goes unfiltered with him. Wants me to meet him somewhere "midway" to talk about a family crisis. Yes, "midway" in a park in their village 11 kms from my house! He has 2 cars and he wants me to bike (mountain bike) 11 kms to a park near his house. Midway (my car is coding, scooter is being repaired). Unfucking believable! Gusto ko nang barahin kaso ako aawayin ng kapatid ko. Ayos3

    Incognito na ako sa Case 1 and Case 2 and am hardening my heart and have started to ignore them. Etong si bayaw ang mahirap ispelengin. Sabi ko hindi talaga ako pwede today of all days. Sabi niya "It's nice knowing you." Okay. Thanks?

    Yup. That's my own genuine dilemma. Pagbigyan niyo na ako at wala lang akong makwentohan. I wish I can point these people to this forum para mas madali ko sila mabara.

  2. #2
    Troll wannabe
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Apt Rule 34
    Pers! Pansinin kita kawawa ka naman.

  3. #3
    Then don't be a welcoming mat. People who take advantage of you are not worth your kindness and time. I think the problem here is the difficulty in saying no and feeling guilty if you don't give in to their request. Screw them and don't be someone's bitch. It's not a bad trait of being firm and saying no. It's not even hardening of your heart, but more on ignoring people who are opportunistic and hope they get the message. Shame on them.

  4. #4
    awww Papi.. bad day huh? tsup tsup mwah mwah!

    Ganyan naman talaga ang ibang tao, kapag binigay mo ang daliri mo, gusto pati buong braso, at minsan pati buong katawan mo, gustong kunin.

    At ang palaging sinasabi ng mother ko "Yun naman anak, eh kung makakalusot lang sila, kung papayag ka, eh papayag ka ba na abusuhin ka?"

    Okay lang yung magbigay ka, tumulong ka, pero yung kaya mo lang, kapag inaabuso ka na, aba huwag kang papayag, hindi ka pinanganak para gawin lang nilang "mat".

    Case 1 - may ganyan din akong friend, utang dito, utang diyan, swerte ka pa, nagbabayad, yung akin, hindi, dinadaan ako sa paawa, naaawa naman ako si ta-nga. Last na utang niya sa akin, kasi manganganak daw siya, eh kataon na kabuwanan ko din, binara ko talaga, sabi ko "pareho lang tayong nabuntis, ang difference lang, kami nag-ipon".

    Ayun, hindi na tumawag sa akin kahit kelan, good riddance! At least nalaman ko kaibigan ko lang pala siya kasi napapautang ko siya.

    Case no. 2 - so kapal na.

    Case no. 3- batukan mo kaya? LOL


    Sabi nga nila, kapag mabait ka, ang tendency ng ibang tao, abusuhin ka. Kaya Papi, learn how to say "NO", kapag nawala sa buhay mo, hindi mo kawalan ano, buti nga yun, mawalan ka ng mga pesteng leech.

    Papi, pautang naman diyan oh?

    Hugs!

  5. #5
    amishuuu
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    you're not concern
    you're the complete opposite of my dad. my dad won't answer landline calls kasi mapapagod daw siyang bumaba ng hagdan at certain times like kung siesta time and near bedtime.

    he lets people spend Php10 to call his cellphone.

    he really asserts himself when he's being put in an inconvenient situation. "they have to respect my time when i want to rest". ganun ba. one time, di ako nakakasagot ng calls niya asa greenhills kami. iniwan niya ako and let me ride the bus

    and he drops clients na mahilig magtanong or manghassle. sasabihin nun "they have the right to choose me, i have the right to choose them".

    ayun choose mo nalang yung gusto mong tulungan.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by chizmojo View Post
    Pers! Pansinin kita kawawa ka naman.
    Awww...thanks chizmojo. Akala ko aabot ng 24 hours na walang nag re-reply eh. Anyway ok lang nailabas ko na paghihimutok ko kaya okay na ako.

    Parang yung mga basurero sa amin pag rumonda at nakiinom. Pag pinagbigyan mo, ikaw na ang magiging refreshment stand sa kalye nyo sa ruta nila. Ubos ang malamig mong tubig. Pag hindi ka na nagpainom, ibabagsak mga trash container mo or iiwan sa kabilang kanto.

    Quote Originally Posted by kreuk View Post
    ayun choose mo nalang yung gusto mong tulungan.
    Ganun gawa ng bayaw ko (and sadly, my sister as well). Namimili ng tutulungan. Kung sino yung gipit na gipit nag aalangang tulungan. Kung sino yung may kaya, mag vo-volunteer silang tulungan. Tulad pag Halloween. Pag yung mga anak na mayayamang taga village ang nag trick or treat, mga imported na treats ang binibigay. Pag yung mga poor kids from the "gillage", pilit na pilit bigyan ng cheap treats at tatarayan pa.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by jazzmine22 View Post
    awww Papi.. bad day huh? tsup tsup mwah mwah!

    Ganyan naman talaga ang ibang tao, kapag binigay mo ang daliri mo, gusto pati buong braso, at minsan pati buong katawan mo, gustong kunin.

    At ang palaging sinasabi ng mother ko "Yun naman anak, eh kung makakalusot lang sila, kung papayag ka, eh papayag ka ba na abusuhin ka?"

    Okay lang yung magbigay ka, tumulong ka, pero yung kaya mo lang, kapag inaabuso ka na, aba huwag kang papayag, hindi ka pinanganak para gawin lang nilang "mat".

    Case 1 - may ganyan din akong friend, utang dito, utang diyan, swerte ka pa, nagbabayad, yung akin, hindi, dinadaan ako sa paawa, naaawa naman ako si ta-nga. Last na utang niya sa akin, kasi manganganak daw siya, eh kataon na kabuwanan ko din, binara ko talaga, sabi ko "pareho lang tayong nabuntis, ang difference lang, kami nag-ipon".

    Ayun, hindi na tumawag sa akin kahit kelan, good riddance! At least nalaman ko kaibigan ko lang pala siya kasi napapautang ko siya.

    Case no. 2 - so kapal na.

    Case no. 3- batukan mo kaya? LOL


    Sabi nga nila, kapag mabait ka, ang tendency ng ibang tao, abusuhin ka. Kaya Papi, learn how to say "NO", kapag nawala sa buhay mo, hindi mo kawalan ano, buti nga yun, mawalan ka ng mga pesteng leech.

    Papi, pautang naman diyan oh?

    Hugs!

    Speaking of floor mat, pautangin na lang kita ng Safeguard...



  8. #8
    Ganoon talaga ang buhay: iilan lamang ang quality ang friendship. Iyong karamihan mga pabigat lang sa buhay natin. Nasa sa atin na iyon kung pagtitiyagaan natin ang mga pabigat sa buhay natin o hindi.

    Ako, kaunting-kaunti lang ang mga taong ka-interact ko nang madalas dahil nga mas gusto ko ang QUALITY kaysa sa QUANTITY.

    --
    my_2_cents

  9. #9
    Hunter Nils's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Lost in the web
    papi, ilabas mo na lang ang inis mo dito sa PEx, mag troll ka na lang sa dragqueen o magkulay ka na lang ng coloring book...

  10. #10
    soundscapes blue_tracer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    behind d waterfall
    papi pautang. nagbabayad ako on time.

    pramis pag 'di ko nabayaran on time, sa iyo na lahat ng baul-baul kung libro sa cosmic sex.

    on topic:

    tsamba lang sa klase ng kaibigan/kamaganak talaga.

    masaklap diyan, yung mga once natulungan mo na tapos medyo umiiwas ka na, sasabihan ka pang nagbago ka na. kasalanan mo pa.

    just learn how to say no with a smile. hahaha

  11. #11
    Hunter Nils's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Lost in the web
    tama si blue_tracer... learn to say no with a smile... madali ngayon yan... 'pre wala akong mapapahiram sa iyo, enrollment ngayon, marami akong scholars' sabay kindat at ngising aso...

  12. #12
    soundscapes blue_tracer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    behind d waterfall
    Quote Originally Posted by Nils View Post
    tama si blue_tracer... learn to say no with a smile... madali ngayon yan... 'pre wala akong mapapahiram sa iyo, enrollment ngayon, marami akong scholars' sabay kindat at ngising aso...
    tingnan ninyo mga kaibigan, kalokohan na naman ang reply.

    scholars hah bwahaha

  13. #13
    Hindi pa rin maka-get over sa safeguard tvc si papi

    Anyway, my mother always tells me na mas mabuti na daw na ikaw ang inuutangan kesa naman ikaw ang kailangan lumapit at mangutang.

  14. #14
    Hunter Nils's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Lost in the web
    Quote Originally Posted by blue_tracer View Post
    tingnan ninyo mga kaibigan, kalokohan na naman ang reply.

    scholars hah bwahaha
    natutunan ko lang yan sa iyo...

  15. #15
    fightin s2pidity since 1904 adiposethoughts's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Elec.DaisyCarnival
    You should PRACTICE already saying "No". EVERYWHERE.

    Kundoktor: Ser san po kayo?
    Papi: Sa Buendia po.
    Kundoktor: Dose lang po.
    Papi: NO!

    =====

    Doctor: Ok sir, please stick out your tongue so that I could see what infection is in your throat.
    Papi: NO!

    =====

    Police: Itaas mo ang mga kamay mo! Wag kang kikilos!
    Papi: NO!

    =====

  16. #16
    HMP! nikiss na nga kita, yung safeguard na naman!



    Papi doodles!

  17. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by Nils View Post
    tama si blue_tracer... learn to say no with a smile... madali ngayon yan... 'pre wala akong mapapahiram sa iyo, enrollment ngayon, marami akong scholars' sabay kindat at ngising aso...
    alam na alam ni Nils oh, iba talaga pag gawain mo eh

    hahaha, joke lang oy.

  18. #18
    amishuuu
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    you're not concern
    ang masaklap diyan mabaet at tatawag lang dahil may kailangan.

    sabi nga ng tatay ko sakin kapag ganyan situation or tao... avoid or dapat sabihan ko ng 'go to hell!' as needed.
    Last edited by kreuk; May 22, 2012 at 11:50 AM.

  19. #19
    amishuuu
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    you're not concern
    Obyus na malakas impluwensiya ng tatay ko sakin.

    Lahat ng sinabi niya sa akin ay totoo. 90% of the people know how to give and take and compromise. 5% are unconditional givers. 5% are unconditional demanding takers. At sabi niya sakin i should always just walk away from that 5% who are unrelenting takers.

    They never stop taking. True? Okay lang na welcome mat ka papi

  20. #20
    ^
    I don't mind the takers. It's the askers who are a pain in the ass.

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