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sabi nga ni scott peck: “Love is not a feeling. Love is an action, an activity. . .Genuine love implies commitment and the exercise of wisdom. . . . love as the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth.....true love is an act of will that often transcends ephemeral feelings of love or cathexis, it is correct to say, 'Love is as love does'.”
yan lang ang mga theo readings ko na binasa ko nung college, hahaha
but still, it feels so academic... minsan you fool yourself into believing that what you have is love, and in that case it is all the more not love, kasi lalo mong hinihinder *** spiritual growth mo, and even of the other person...
to answer the TS, you do not "know" that you love a person, you "choose" to love a person... and this choice is not just a spur of the moment choice, tainted by the magical feeling of "being in love", but an informed choice taking into consideration the welfare of both you and the other person.
well, just what i think... people may agree or disagree...
^ Oh, but on the contrary, I cannot choose who I want to love. I just love him period and it's not really a decision I can consciously make. In fact, my conscious mind might even choose to not love him, but what can I do, the heart wants what the heart wants. As I said, love is not rational. Now, loving per se and the things you do out of love are two very different things. I may have no choice but to love the person, but I can choose not to be with him. Doesn't lessen my love for him.
Alright enough, linalanggam na ako at sumosobra ang pagka-corny baka may magreact nanaman.
^ We have the same point, honey, just saying it differently. To commit or to let go is your act out of love, that is what you get to choose. Here's my question: You don't get to choose your parents, do you? But you love them. (that goes for spiritual love). You don't get to choose who you'd fall in love with, do you? But you love him/her. (that's romantic love)
As far as deciding TO love. Well, I don't know about you but I can't decide to love my parents, my significant other, my friends. I just do, or I just don't. I know makulit but my point mainly is that I can only decide what I get to do out of love (to commit, to let go, etc.)
Personal experience and inputs...
Love - you look for him/her when not around and no matter what oddities may come, what you feel for him/her never fades away.
Infatuation - you look for him/her when not around but when you see/meet a new better person, feeling fades away slowly.
This is best described by experience IMHO...lalo kapag wala na sa tabi mo yung important person nayun. e.g. namatay, nangibang bayan, lumayo, hindi nagparamdam... despite na wala sa paningin mo at kahit anong klaseng nilalang ang na-meet mo na better/prettier/more handsome etc...pero sya parin nasa isip mo...then, it's probably "LOVE".
Honey, I don't disagree with your point about loving and falling in love. Yes, I agree they are different. I just expressed my pov differently. There's the romantic kind of love (falling in love) and the spiritual kind (loving).
But I'd have to disagree with what you're saying that I get to decide to love. It has never been a conscious decision that I made. I just did. In my case, this goes for both spiritual and romantic. The things that I do out of love are what I get to choose, not to love itself. As humans, I believe it's in our nature to love (both spiritual and romantic), meaning it can happen whether we choose for it to happen or not.
Each is entitled to his own opinion though, so if that's yours, this is mine.
anyway, here are two ways of looking at love, and it seems both are plausible and reasonable... great discussion here, thank you very much... now can i invite you for coffee? haha, joke lang
abstract.. lots of uncertainties. kaya nga falling in love eh.
basta pag parang kulang-kulang ka na.. minsan nangingiting mag isa habang nasa bus o kotse.. yun in love ka na.
hirap idefine ng love ano? magkakaiba kasi mga naranasan niyo, mga pananaw niyo, mga biases niyo paukol sa phenomena na ito..
pero eto na lang para sa akin...
the meaning of love depends on who defines it.. It also depends on certain circumstances that account for the person's idea of love..
when you find and appreciate the wonderful things that are going for her other than her looks
If you opted to stick with that person despite his/her unreasonable behaviour or whatever flaws he/she may have.
Nagtataka ako sa inyo, pag nagmahal ba kayo at hindi nag-work out ang relationship, hindi na yun "mahal talaga"?
Kailangan talaga merong ultimate mahal na mahal na tao? Hindi ba pwedeng mahalin mo ng "talaga" kung sino man ang kapiling mo ngayon?
If you love the person and he/she reciprocates fairly then for me its good reason enough to say nagmamahalan talaga kayo. Be thankful of what you have at wag nang mag-isip ng kung anu-anong siyet TS.
“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect – you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break – her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.”
-Bob Marley on How to love a woman
Pag di mo na maimagine ang mangyayari sayo pag nawala na siya.
When you don't think or care about anything or anyone except him/her! And this is the worst feeling EVER!!
para sakin masasabi kong mahal ko na ang isang tao kapag sobrang sayako pag magkasama kami ,