Nickname: Devon
Status: In House
Real Name: Devon May Natividad Seron
Origin: Cebu City
Age: 16
Birthdate: May 20, 1993
Nationality: Filipino
Occupation:
Civil Status: Single
Religion: Roman Catholic
Hobbies: Badminton
Favorite Color: Blue
Favorite Food: Spaghetti
Favorite Show: ASAP
Favorite Actor: John Lloyd Cruz
Favorite Actress: Bea Alonzo
Favorite Singer: Paramore, Avril Lavigne
Sa isang squatters area sa Cebu lumaki at nagkamalay itong si Devon. Anim silang nakatira sa isang bahay, at tatlong hakbang lang ay malilibot na ang buong kabahayan.
Driver ang tatay ni Devon, rumaraket naman ang kanyang ina sa pamamagitan ng pamimigay ng leaflets, apat silang magkakapatid. Sa hirap ng buhay ng kanilang pamilya ay naranasan na nilang hindi kumain sa loob ng isang buong araw, minsan naman nakakakain pero tuyo lang ang ulam.
Sa kabila ng kahirapan nararanasan ay masiyahing dalaga si Devon. Mahilig din siya magsuot ng damit panlalaki, at isa sa madalas niyang hiraman ng damit ay ang tatay niya to the point na kung minsan ang tatay niya ang nagsusuot ng damit pambabae.
Naranasan na rin ni Devon ang hindi makapag-take ng exam dahil hindi siya nakapagbayad ng matrikula. At nitong graduation niya ay kamuntik na siyang hindi makapag-martsa, honor student pa naman siya, sa parehong dahilan- hindi nakapagbayad ng matrikula.
Sa tulong ni Kuya ay nakatungtong ng entablado si Devon at nakamit ang pinaghirapan niyang diploma.
Nickname: James
Status: In House
Real Name: Robert James Reid
Origin: Australia
Age:
Birthdate: May 11
Nationality: Half-Australian, Half-Filipino
Occupation:
Civil Status: Single
Religion:
Hobbies: Swimming, Music, Going to the beach
Favorite Food: Sinigang
Nag-aaral na si James nang lumipat silang mag-ama dito sa Pilipinas. Sa isang regular school siya pumasok, pero nahirapan siyang makapag-adjust academically kaya naman ipinasok siya ng kanyang Australian father sa isang distant-learning center.
Dahil sa kanyang mestizo looks maraming humahanga dito kay James pero may mga pagkakataong nakukulang pa rin s’ya ng lakas ng loob. At ito’y sa pagkakataon kailangan ‘yang magsalita sa harap ng maraming tao. Kapag kinakailangan n’yang magsalita in public, nagkakaroon s’ya ng mental block at di makapagsalita.
Maraming Pinoy friends si James, pero sapat na kaya ang pagiging pala-kaibigan ng binata para makapag-adjust siya sa loob ng bahay ni Kuya, o tulad ng kanyang pag-aaral ay kinakailangan niya ng special attention?
There didn’t seem to be much of a difference on any of the three, and DD doubted if there really is any. In his cynical mind, the invention of words is simply a phenomenon where human beings wish to satiate their cravings for a more extensive vocabulary.
Anyway, it’s none of his business.
But then again, none ever is.
Or that’s what he believed he thought.
The sun fading in the west marked the last traces of the spring sunshine, leaving behind an afternoon that evoked summer and its warm, cloudless weather. Its light’s rays and breeze offered an aura of life to the myriad of colors encompassing the full essence of the carnival they were in. Yes, it was summer once again, and with it comes another break from the chaotic schedules they were so used to have. It was time to relax and enjoy life to the fullest. It was time to exhaust all the energies of youth anyone could still extend to their hearts’ content.
None of that mattered to a certain dark-haired Aussie, though, who, in his cynicism, had never seen the difference of the seasons except for what they have to represent. Neither season gave him the rest and the solitude he wished, noting that he was always an in-demand model/actor/singer in any time of the year.
Like what he is exactly experiencing this very second. Not that he took pleasure in experiencing every part of it.
For with every touch and hug they snatched from him, he was only coaxed to silently command that he be granted the privacy he needed right now. With every question they throw at him, he was only reminded of the redundancy of his life as he answered each one of them for the—he lost count—time. With every girlish shriek he encountered, he was only personifying Heartlessness more and more. And with every flash they stun him with, he was only escalating his belief that every picture they took from him is as flat as a body without a soul.
Yet all of them seep into nothingness—as trifling as thin air itself—as he calmly took in the view that was laid bare before him…across miles of cameras, ambush interviews, shrieks, stolen pecks-on-the cheeks and hugs.
MM. Not his anymore.
Compared to her, he is as trifling as thin air itself.
It is how you drown right after she has captured you that sets her apart from all the rest, drowning in the abysmal depths of her eyes. Her aura will surround the whole atmosphere, and after you see her, you’ll fall under her spell and into her very own world. And what a wonderful world she has. Time and space mold into nothingness when you are around her as if the two entities both stopped in their venture, just waiting for her next word to move again. Everything is so wonderfully simple and beautiful with her that you could never ask for more.
DD should know. She always was the only one who could drown him with her eyes, her personality, her smile. And she always will be the only one who could drown him still.
But seeing her there without him, knowing with a pang that he is here watching her from afar with the miles keeping them apart, he had never felt so vulnerable and lonely as today.
Because all he could think of now is the fact that all he truly needed is her--or he’d rather not have any of what he is being forced with now at all.
But then, he remembered his promise, and though it seems so hard to keep, he’ll still keep it.
He tried to escape the bitterness he felt by looking away from his sudden memory of MM by widening his gaze to a bigger part of the carnival while impassively veering away from the crowd that had ruthlessly choked him. In one corner he got a clearer view of Bretzie at one booth. He also saw his sister with her boyfriend kissing over two ice cream cones they held with their arms entwined, while Jenny was trying to push Ryan into the House of Mirrors, apparently wanting to spend more time with her boyfriend as the latter was also experiencing the same fate as his with the smaller crowd around him.
He observed them as they made their own worlds, which in turn made them look so happy and so carefree. He observed, his heart twitching, that everyone had a real partner…except him. It hadn’t unnerved him that much before (how glad was he to be relieved of a love team, even for this one slight moment), but now he felt the bitterness consume him with its deadly grip.
Because all he could STILL think of now is the fact that all he truly, really needed is her--or he’d rather not have anyone or anything at all.
But then again, he still remembered his promise, and though it seems so hard to keep, he’ll still keep it.
So he again tried moving away, looking away, do anything that would distract him from her. But just like the picture from the wall of his room, and just like the sleepless nights he encountered these days, and just like the thoughts that would unconsciously scald his mind with burned ashes of regret, he realized that he could never get enough of her as his mind clearly projected her image, sitting in that bench, just as alone as he is though she’s smiling contentedly and sweetly at the views before her…
With hesitation, he silently turned his way towards her again…only to find himself catching the painful shock that rose up in his throat. His white shirt paled in comparison to his deathly complexion, the regret and the pain and the anger and the jealousy killing him, consuming him, tearing him to pieces, destroying him and his spirit, grabbing him by his heart…
And they wouldn’t let go.
He never should’ve just looked the other way. He never should’ve just looked her way again.
He never should’ve just seen Ayven with his camera as he took pictures of her in every angle. He never should’ve just seen MM glare playfully as she tried to take the camera away from him. He never should’ve just seen him take her hand then and whisper something in her ear, making her nudge him in the process as she tried to control her laughter. He never should’ve just seen take her and her bag as they started walking the other way, Ayven softly tapping her shoulder as he whispered in her ear again, while this time she didn’t even bother to control the soft laugh she had let out. And he never should’ve just seen her take his hand while she gently led him to a store where she had pointed to a guitar on display, smiling at him solemnly.
By then he never would have regretted being in this place. He never would’ve grieved over the fact that he is here, occupied with all that nonsense while she is over there…happy without him but with somebody else. He never would’ve just wished for that year to pass too quickly. He never would’ve wished to turn back time and have her again and make it all right. He never would’ve wished to just scream his lungs out.
He never would’ve wished for the unjustifiable resentment to just go away and leave him to wither and die.
But, oh, by Gods, she had never looked this happy, so intense, so relaxed and so free with him--not even once. And this simple fact had the inimitable manner to hurt him powerfully so...
“Daydreaming again, DD?”
That voice. It had saved him again from his anguish, while her arm brazenly snaked around his figure and found his forearm. Then the voice was coupled with a pair of black eyes that looked up at him candidly. The other hand was coyly pointing at a booth where a teddy bear was resting, along with other toys.
He had blinked his eyes disinterestedly, making Lauren laugh that sparkling laugh of hers which held no traces of sarcasm. Her voice must’ve been loud enough for it had caught each of their attention. All of their eyes had been trained on him for a long moment of seconds. At the corner of his eye he could sense Ayven, Lyan and Bret tense uncertainly, while Fretzie was looking at him with wary eyes. Jenny looked worried as she looked at him then at MM and then at him again.
Only Lauren’s BF and MM were oblivious.
And their own worlds had all dissipated and had diffused as one. Solely on him.
How does a caged bird feel when he’d see those eyes engulfing him, trapping him, enslaving him…?
“Oh…you know, Lauren, don’t mind him when he’s in that mood…actually, DD is just always like that—”
“—that’s right, Lauren!! Bret is telling you the truth. Just like MM, DD never really liked—” and Jenny had caught her tongue before Ayven’s glare could reach her, but not without giving him a stronger glare in return, surprising Ayven—and eventually souring his once happy mood in the process, while she instantly turned to her boyfriend for support. “Lyan, look!! Have you seen that—?”
After that, all tried to act as if nothing ever happened at all, as they all tried to resume to their former businesses.
And since he is DD…and since being the DD, he doesn’t judge, question, object or care…and since he supposedly hated women like MM…and since he didn’t give a damn to MM at all…and since it is Toot he truly loved, he was trying to occupy himself with the clear view of the sky and be truly out of it…
Only to realize that he’s only fuelling the fire of his tormented soul as he gazed at the sky that so reminded him of cloud gazing days he never thought he could remember again. Only to realize that wherever he’d go, wherever he’d look, all he could think of is her…
A tap on his hand had softly roused him. That simple touch, though quite careful and fleeting, was enough to dissuade his unfocused attention and turn to…her.
He actually knew it was her.
Nobody’s touch was that gentle, yet firm.
Nobody’s touch—ever—had this effect on him.
Their eyes met.
She was smiling comfortingly, trying to tell him that everything will be alright. Just like their time together at the PBB house before. Just like that night…
Kami, if only she knew.
Hell, he needed to scream.
But she smiled up at him again, her touch tightening a little, and this time he couldn’t stop his heart from hammering rapidly, squeezing itself out. He tried ignoring it, reminding himself again that this is not her girlfriend. He dispensed that moment completely, smiling that small smirk of his as he looked away impassively…
Nobody noticed how her face fell. And nobody noticed the sudden darkening of Ayven’s eyes when he saw DD and MM’s nearness. For the others, it was purely natural—and therefore, negligible—that Ayven took hold of her hand once again and led her unobtrusively away from him.
But MM noticed it. And so did DD.
Especially DD.
And for that split second, for that briefest of interlude, he just realized why he felt so cold, upset, uncomfortable, irritated and uptight. He hated this ignoring, dispensing and pretending and was tired of it all. For that sudden strike of the hand, he wanted nothing more than for the truth to be out, no matter what.
So he could really be selfishly happy, for once. So he could finally be with her, because he had been foolishly denying himself this for so long.
He knew it was foolish to feel it, but juices brought by jealousy are just so powerful, just so contagious and just so addictive that he felt it nonetheless. It was his possessiveness then which made him hate Ayven the moment he knew the man was trying to get MM. And it is his possessiveness now which made him hate Ayven still.
But just like before, he still didn’t do anything about it.
Because now it is still Ayven who’s already taking the lead, with MM’s hand holding on to him. And even if her eyes were questioning in confusion, it only took Ayven to softly look at her and whisper in her ear as he efficiently led her to another far away booth for the uncertainty to dissipate.
MM looked around her, but nobody met her gaze. Nobody noticed so they could meet her gaze.
She looked back at DD again. Smiling reassuringly again for his sake. He felt his insides tremble, that scream in him getting louder and louder and more vicious it would be so blissful if it were granted release…
It was only a matter of seconds before DD casually and coldly looked away.
Again.
And all along, Lauren looked on, thinking.
.
...
.
chapter 2.
What is the color of frustration?
Would it differ according to how much you bear? Would it make a kaleidoscope or a rainbow in your heart that—in effect—you could overcome it with its vibrance and beauty? Would it even choose the color it would like to be bathed with? Would it heighten its intensity in ranges and ranges of invisible light if it is all the more confusing? Would it shift in monochromes, hues and tints if the bearer also harbors conflicts within herself?
MM had to know. For she may both be loved and hated with her no-nonsense attitude and naïveté, she at least should have also been commended for her inquisitiveness and wit.
She is an honor student, after all. And she had fared more than very well in her classes. Even if her scoliosis inhibited her from stressful activities sometimes, she still managed to be on the tops’ list. She loved music, and she especially had already mastered using the guitar and the piano. Surely you couldn’t have that much of an achievement if you do not at least have a critical and analyzing mind?
Yes, her brain may be a little off-balance as of the moment, but it was not lazy. One thing she loved about her brain is that it more than fought for her. It never stops learning, and it never fails to give her moments of reminiscing, wondering, analyzing, studying and questioning, like what all normal brains would do.
Therefore, she is neither blind nor dumb nor idiotic. And if there is one thing she could be sure of, it is the fact that she is uncomfortable being treated as such.
The reason she may be internally blabbering right now could be accounted for something—rather, someone—that triggered her to do so.
A set of inconsistencies. A case of heavily veiled slip-ups. And they all unsettle her. Confuse her.
She had been so out of touch of reality—her own reality—for far too long already that she wanted to instantly forget everything and just leave out those that make her happy.
But she wanted all the trimmings. And even if this pretension had gone for a year, she still wanted closure.
Good friends are supposed to be honest to each other, right?
It was obvious DD hadn’t done quite an exemplary job on doing such.
She needed to think. And so she continued to sit on the bench, refused her friends’ invitation to go somewhere else as she tried to get her thoughts into some kind of order before her emotions could take over.
And even after all that happened, she still remembered that night, a year ago…
--
BORA, 1 year ago
If only she just stayed at her home, took care of her family and studied. If only she refused this invitation in the first place. Then she wouldn’t have the burden of trying to ignore him, avoid him and control the urge to cry so that she couldn’t destroy the happy mood of her friends. While silently she was pining for him that he at least try to approach her, to make an effort to walk beside her, to look at her, to ask her what’s wrong, and at the same time slowly stab herself to death as she watch the two of them getting closer every minute as his feats became bolder and more patent.
She’s disgusted with herself thinking about her stupidity.
Perhaps she really is foolish. The man obviously is already in love with somebody else, and here she is, still pining for his attention—for God’s sake. She tried controlling the self-mocking laugh that rose in her throat. Maybe she really is mentally challenged after all. Maybe even sicker than what she seems.
Really, didn’t she just love hurting herself?
Or maybe the saner part of her knew better. Maybe it was the saner part of her which motivated her to come here so that she could see the truth for herself. So that it could finally open her eyes and make her accept that she’d lost the fight rather than burden herself in self-denial and leave it alone until it becomes more than what her heart could handle.
You cannot continue on mooning over a man who is clearly not interested in you even the slightest bit.
He likes somebody else. And that somebody else was someone she could never hate (even if she was the one who took DD away from her) no matter how much she tried. For that somebody else is simply one of her friends, simply the one who helped her become what she is right now.
So in a way, she really couldn’t blame their fans. She really couldn’t blame him for blurting that out when he was interviewed in The Buzz. She really couldn’t blame DD for falling in love with a certain Toot. Especially a sweet and diligent person like Toot.
But that also didn’t mean that letting go is much easier and less painful. Why can’t she just have him all for herself, didn’t she love him enough?
But as soon as the questions rose in her mind, she already knew the answer.
A cold sensation seized her at that. How more awful could it get the next time, to get to see him and her again in another event while you still harbor a certain thought, a certain hope in your heart, that next time it will be different and everything you see after all is nothing, nothing to be afraid of at all—only to find out that it had actually gone all the more clearer with his advancing gestures?
DD had never been a man of words. With the few moments she had with him, she had come to realize that. He may be coldly arrogant and cruel with his actions and with the words he would actually blurt out, but she knew that at least, it was never his intention to directly hurt her.
She knew because he never took advantage of her after she had given him all the opportunities that she could spin—like those massages. Yes, most of the times, she had more than literally thrown herself at him (something she was never proud of doing, thus again marking her stupidity), but he never even took those openings to foist on her. And because of that, he only made her love him more.
He was nice to her, in a way. Really patient, though somewhat coldly. And very straightforward. He’d tell her what he didn’t like about her without a second thought. Even told her what she could never expect from him. And because of that, she had come to love him for his honesty.
And even if he didn’t say that what’s between them is something to be thought about, he’d still join her as if giving her a chance with him, while he seemed to test the waters himself. And she had loved him because he still gave her hope for that day when he will come to love her, too.
So she waited. And waited. Waited while she hanged on for that little piece of hope, of love.
But the day never came.
That day was too late in coming. It wasn’t able to catch up before he had found the one who had finally caught his heart without even trying. And even if he tried to be silent about it, she knew.
She always knew. She knew before he did that it was finally over. She just couldn’t accept it.
Because she’s both stupid and insane. Because she’s too selfish to only think about herself. Because she still wondered if he at least, had that something for her. Wondered if his patience with her boring presence was at least because he found her a little interesting. Wondered if he was only going out with her because Toot—she is not blind not to know that—was nowhere to be found. Wondered if his actions towards her were fuelled by hormones. Or pity.
Unintentional it may be to him, but he had done the most awful thing he could ever do to her: making her favors because he pitied her.
And it must have been the same pity he felt when he had finally found his love but couldn’t bluntly tell that to her face so he had to convey it in another way. But his actions only made her fervently wish that he could just say it to her, so it could give them the closure they both wanted.
She didn’t know how to describe her feelings after knowing that. A mix of pain, self-resentment, hate, too much love…too much insanity…the thought that she must have appeared so disgusting that people had to take pity on her before they could do things for her.
A tear trickled down her cheek, and she immediately swiped it with her arm before a lot more could fall to the ground. She had grown tired of all her masks and pretenses, so she’d come up to escape for a while, hoping to get back refreshed. Instead, her heart was even more shattered than before.
She wouldn’t wait anymore. Why hope for something you already knew could never be yours? Why make him suffer when you could suffer alone? Why hold on to a love that had never existed?
A dreadful loneliness came over her by just considering the thought. She stood up. Thinking got you nowhere—it only made things worse. Shaking a bit, she forcibly collected her bearings. Soon she will be trudging towards their place and give them her ‘best bubbly MM smile’ pretense, patiently reassuring them all with that voice of hers that she was finally worn out and could now sleep just fine. Then she’d get inside her room and at least try to look asleep before her friends could further ask her for questions.
And in the morning, she will be refreshed once again and take on with her life—without trying to pester him or ask for his attention; he’ll get the hunch that she’s no longer his responsibility and that she’s letting him go already. Then she’ll hopefully move on years later as if nothing happened. She’ll take the chance to be on the dean’s list so she could give it all back to her parents. Yes, her parents. She’d pool all of her energy on her studies and on making her parents proud. She’ll study hard. Harder. She’ll make a name for herself; maybe even consider that modeling offer an agency had given her. And maybe after knowing that she’s ready—really ready—she’d search him out on her own and finally talk to him.
She smiled slowly at her plans she had already laid out in front of her. They at least gave her a sense of direction, of normalcy. Reassuring herself that she was ready enough, she whirled around to return to the warmth and comfort of her friends.
She was definitely not prepared for this. Definitely not expecting to find him standing only a few feet away from where she is. He was just standing there, not moving. Most of the features of his face were hidden in the shadows. His eyes were unreadable but she knew they were directed at her…were watching her.
He seemed to be waiting for her.
At any other given time, this simple act might have easily made her blush. At any other given time, her heart might have fluttered for this quite romantic moment.
You cannot continue on mooning over a man who is clearly not interested in you even the slightest bit.
And she knew that it was surely their friends again who looked for her. Undoubtedly spurned from concern and from their matchmaking tendencies. That was enough to stop any romantic musings she must have been tempted to cling to. She composed herself for the final time before she walked up towards the more lighted part of the beach, towards him, towards their friends. Her steps were steady; her eyes were unwavering, only focused on that lighted place where their friends would be.
She moved past him at his side without stopping. She will not—will not—even give him one glance.
His hand had easily seized her arm before she could continue moving on without him.
In a few seconds, nobody dared to move. Nobody dared to break the tensed silence yet.
She calmly snatched her arm back, not even bothering to look at her side to where he surely is. She knew it would be the end of her if she’d look at him and his beautiful eyes right now. But what do you expect from her really? When it comes to this man, all the resolve she had so painstakingly built would always seem to easily disintegrate.
So she turned and looked at him, her mask falling into place. She did it so with a boyish, tough and reassuring smile and with an apologetic expression, the kind she was very known for. Her expression was enough to put him to a moment of confusion.
“Thank you for the concern, DD, but I can return by myself. Good night.”
He blinked, then narrowed his eyes. Whether it was because she spoke straight English or because she somewhat denied him, she will never know.
She didn’t want to know anymore.
And with a little wave, she gave him one last smile and proceeded on her way without him. She felt him still staring at her retreating form.
There were no more words after that. She found out with that one encounter that she really hadn’t found the courage to say the words that were needed yet. But she also knew, at the back of her mind, that there really was no need for words anymore. DD is, after all, a very intelligent man. And a man of deep silence, someone who understood it better than anybody else.
It might be painful for now, but she knew that in due time, she will heal.
She will heal, she will get better, and she will live on.
She just hoped it would come fast.
.
…
.
chapter 3.
MANILA, ten months ago
She realized that even in school, she still had nowhere to escape.
And that the rumors had a way of spreading rapidly, even in one of the most isolated places.
Oh, my, that really is juicy.
But…are you sure?
Haven’t you read the tabloids recently? I swore I just saw one with a picture of the two of them together! Talk about the growing paparazzi in Makati but they really looked cute!
Hey, I also saw the two of them get out from the ABS studio!! Some of their friends were also there, but they were close to each other!
Oh, then it must also have been them I saw somewhat arguing playfully on that square—
That must mean something! Ah, I guess DD’s not mine anymore.
You are no match for Toot, Rina. So better drop it if I were y—
What did I just hear? Are you telling me that Toot and DD are dating?
Not only that, I also spotted them kissing—
Why don’t you just shut up and make a fan club already?
They already have one, idiot! It’s called JamToot—
One of the good things about it is that it has started to sound so familiar she wouldn’t flinch that much anymore. This kind of occurrence also helped her a lot to remember where she is positioned in this wicked situation only the hearts could design; rumors helped her strengthen her resolve…albeit painfully.
And besides, and perhaps the most important of all is that, she is not somebody’s friend for nothing. She definitely knew her place with Toot. And she more definitely knew her new place with DD. And she most definitely knew that her new place with DD must not change her standing with Toot, whatever may happen.
It would be somehow offensive to her intellect if they even assumed she’d forget she’s one of Toot’s friends and throw that all away just because of some unrequited teenage fantasy.
“MM! THERE YOU ARE!”
The voice was loud enough to make her turn around and be suddenly shoved into arms that she only knew too well. Still surprised by what happened, she tried entangling herself away from the now strangling arms, flushing furiously.
“T-Tricia…m-my b-back…”
And the arms instantly let loose. “Oh…sorry! Guess I got carried away. Did I hurt y—?”
But MM simply waved at her with her good arm dismissively. “Don’t worry, I still live.”
“Now tell me what the nurse told you before your best friend would get crazier with worry here! So, is it bad? Will your arm be all right?”
“Oh, Tricia. I’m fine, really—”
It’s quite a surprise, even for her, how Tricia turned from her “rival” to best friend.
Right after she left the PBB house, Fretzie was very immersed with her other friends and her other love interests that they barely got time to bond again. Then in one time, during rehearsal, Tricia sat beside her and talked to her. Really talked to her. And ever since then, they continued their ritual of communicating until Tricia blurted something out of the blue:
“You are the best ate I never had.”
It was the greatest thing Tricia had told her, and in that instant, they became very close friends.
She really was a sweet person, maybe too young for such, and Devon has never felt so guilty at how she had behaved towards the girl inside the house before. She was only very happy that she was able to make it up to her now and still be close.
Even despite how rich Tricia is.
For some reason only Tricia knows, she transferred schools from Davao to Manila. MM was luckier how she got to change schools and still retain the scholarship she had. They belong to the same school now, and even if MM is years older than her, they make it a point to have similar schedules so they still have time to meet and bond.
“Tricia has all the right to be concerned!!” came a booming voice which both knew too well.
They silently signaled each other as they both turned to meet Jenny who had just appeared and was still breathing rather raggedly.
And before any of them could say another word, they heard someone—quite similar to their teacher—shouting at the farthest corner of the building: “Jenny Kim! You still haven’t cleaned the locker rooms yet!”
Tricia and MM looked at their friend, who was obviously escaping again.
“Jenny?”
“Ssshhh! Quick! Move! Run! Run!”
And before anyone could say any word of protest, Jenny had moved so easily on MM’s side and unceremoniously clamped her arm—unfortunately for MM, the one which was exactly injured—and hastily scampered off to another side of the school, ruthlessly running away. It was only minutes later when the three of them were already hanging out in a food store close to their school, still wearing their gym uniforms and still breathing hard.
“That was close!!” Jenny had managed at last with her bated breath.
“Y-you…do not need to drag us into your mess, too, you know,” MM reprimanded, still breathing hard. She felt that her heart was about to explode from all that running.
“Well, since we are already here,” Jenny continued on, now relaxed as she lounged on her chair as if she hadn’t heard anything at all, “we better make ourselves comfortable for I do not plan to go back to those locker rooms!!”
Then Jenny had that suddenly excited look in her eyes whenever a spontaneous thought entered her mind. “Hey, why don’t we call up our PBB friends now so we could all meet? We haven’t seen them for decades!!”
For a moment, nobody talked. Tricia and MM looked at each other until both had silently decided that Tricia should point it out for the two of them. Apparently, their other friend was still oblivious, as always. “You did realize, did you, Jenny, that it’s still before school dismissal hours?”
And of course they were right. Jenny was still oblivious about it as she easily reached up a menu book to fan herself. “So what? We are here.”
“What I mean is, the others are still in their classes, Jenny. We just happen to be here because you hauled us out to join your little escapade. Or have you forgotten about that?” Tricia added.
The fanning stopped abruptly. “Oh.”
“Yes. Oh.”
The fanning resumed. Faster this time. “Doesn’t matter now. I’m still not going back to those locker rooms!!”
That was when they knew Jenny got infected by the Ryan Bang disease. Silence again.
“I really won’t!!”
Silence once more.
“W-well, if you two don’t mind, I have to go back—”
“Of course!!” And, as if remembering, Jenny had easily discarded the menu book/fan and snatched MM’s injured arm as if inspecting it. “This.” She looked at MM questioningly.
“Oh, that?” MM started, wincing.
“Yes, this. So…what did the nurse say about this?”
MM couldn’t help but wave at her other friend dismissively for the second time. They just get too worried when it comes to her sometimes (but she couldn’t help but resent it at times because it’s like they’re treating her as if she’s weak).
“Jenny, it’s just a sprain.”
“Oh? Then why isn’t this placed in a swing?”
“It’s a sling, Jenny,” Tricia injected gently.
“Sling. Whatever. Well?” Jenny’s face suddenly zoomed in on MM’s, effectively closing her vision.
“I was just going to have it placed in a sling…but…”
“But?”
“The two of you came and dragged me in here before I could proceed to the station the nurse had told me to go for the supplies,” MM supplied.
“I didn’t drag you in here,” Tricia defended in a half-pout, her eyes half-glaring at Jenny. “She did.”
“Now, now, enough for that. What has passed has passed. What we need to focus on now is our friend here.” Even with her steady voice, they both knew that Jenny was hiding her slight humiliation.
“M-me?” MM sputtered incredulously while looking suspiciously at Jenny. “Why me?”
“Why, do you really think we wouldn’t be worried nuts after knowing that you have this?” Unfortunately again, Jenny was wriggling MM’s injured arm much to the injured lady’s painful discomfort.
“But, Jenny, that’s only a—”
“Jenny, you’re hurting MM’s—”
“It’s not only a sprain!! You had this because I hit the volley ball too hard!!”
“It was my foolishness that I wasn’t able to toss it well, Jenny. Really, I’ll live—this is nothing.”
“Jenny, you’re still holding MM’s arm rather tightly.”
“Hmm…”
Tricia tried again. “And MM is in pain.”
“I told her so!! But she wouldn’t listen—!!”
“So I believe that it’s much better if you release her arm right now.”
Jenny looked at her hand, then at her friend’s face. MM weakly smiled. She instantly released it.
“Oh.”
“Yes, Jenny. Oh.”
Silence, until, Jenny had broken it again. From her expression, she was already discarding what happened and was now shifting to another topic to dwell on. “Then…what will we do with this situation now that our MM’s arm is injured?”
“Allow me to return to school so I’d have it placed in a sling?” MM offered, until Jenny glared at her.
“You didn’t…no, you just didn’t…DON’T TELL ME NOBODY REALIZES IT??”
Since most of the people in the café are already used to Jenny’s outbursts like this, some of them merely glanced at her curiously, wondering what had gotten her to do it this time.
“OH NO!! This is our demise!! Now that MM’s arm is injured we are all surely doomed!!”
“Jenny, you’re just exaggerating.”
“No, MM, I’m not!! It’s the fact that the sprain is in your right arm which makes it all worse!!”
“It’s nothing—”
“I bet you haven’t really realized the implications yet!!”
MM just looked at her, obviously confused. And in an instant, MM’s hairs stood on end as Jenny had one of her legs already stomping the floor. One of her hands was on her hips while the other was just pointing and hovering under MM’s nose.
“I knew it!! MM, haven’t you just realized that if your right arm is injured…you couldn’t…you just couldn’t—HOW COULD YOU EVEN WRITE? You write with your right arm, don’t you?”
For a moment, nobody talked. Nobody had really seen the situation that way.
“How will we deal with that especially now that it’s near our taping week and the much horrifying final exams? How could MM catch up with her honors if she couldn’t even write?”
Still, the other two were just silent with their own thoughts to accompany them. It didn’t matter to Jenny, though.
“And more importantly, HOW COULD SHE HELP ME WITH MY ASSIGNMENTS IF SHE COULDN’T WR—?” Tricia had hit her with the menu book warningly before the lady could ramble more.
“You’re making MM upset,” she whispered. They both looked at MM. Who was only smiling. Calmly smiling. Something which does not go very well with an over-concerned, over-worried-for-her-assignment Jenny at all.
“MM, WE OBVIOUSLY HAD A SITUATION HERE AND YOU’RE JUST SMILING???”
But MM remained unperturbed. “You really don’t need to worry, Jenny. But now that you mention it…I’m sure I’ll get along just fine.”
“HOW WILL Y—??”
“Don’t worry. I’ll live,” MM pressed more firmly, her eyes closed. She was nodding to herself. Then she opened her eyes and smiled at them again.
“But how?”
“There’s only one way to find out, right?” MM finally retorted, slowly smiling. And that was when she stood up.
“Hey, where are y—?”
“I’m going back to school.”
For a moment, they were thinking that it was a sly look which MM had on her eyes.
“But, MM, you can’t!!”
But MM only winked at them. “Relax. I won’t tell your teacher—or any soul at all—where you are hiding, Jenny. Besides, I need to talk to the dean about my writing situation.”
“B-but—”
“Also, my arm badly needed a sling.” She gestured for her arm. “And you two badly needed someone who’d bring the bags and uniforms back for you.”
It was obvious in their dawning looks that they have forgotten about their things. MM smiled at that.
“Well…are you sure you don’t want to…?”
“Yes, I’m sure. I’ll catch up on you later.” She then added with a smile. “With your bags and clothes.”
“Oh, thank you very much, MM!! You are always very kind!!”
“And we will be waiting here? You don’t want me to go with y—?”
“Assessing the situation, Tricia, who do you think badly needed the company?”
“HEY!!! What’s that supposed to mean?” Jenny chirped, her fist hanging in the air good-naturedly.
“Oh, nothing, Jenny. Absolutely nothing,” MM said with the sweetest and shyest voice she could muster.
They were sure it was a sly look in her eyes this time. It was still slightly sly, but sly, nonetheless. If you get what I—er, they—mean.
“Oh, nothing really, huh?” Jenny decided to play along, happy that at least MM now had the enthusiasm to be this mischievous. Especially after noticing that MM had become a little off lately.
“Okay, then, we’ll wait for you here. And we’ll make sure that DD and the rest of the HMs will be here as well before you arrive,” Jenny added with a wink.
Tricia nodded, phone already in her hands. If there is one thing they knew about Tricia after being together for such a long time, it is the fact that she’d always bring her cell phone with her all the time.
But they didn’t see the sudden change of MM’s expression right after Jenny mumbled his name.
Neither did the two know the implications—nor the results—of those words as MM silently went out the cafeteria.
(to be continued...)
FanFic by lhee0807
HE ACTUALLY REALLY CARES
As time passes by, we clearly are leading to different paths. I chose to be on the limelight. She chose to do things slowly. She wants to finish her studies while taking every opportunity that came her way in showbiz. Because of that, I rarely see her these days.
Sometimes, I wish that we never left the PBB House. It was more fun there than in the outside world. At that house, we are all equal. I am just James. She was just Devon. Though, as she has always emphasized, we are opposites, in that house, we can freely show how we care for each other. Yes, there were times that she’ll avoid me for a reason I didn’t know, I can always chase her. Chase her until she would have no choice but to notice me. But now, it is different.
The outside world is so damn big that she can hide from me and I won’t have freakin time to find her. She’s avoiding me again. And it is damn frustrating! I wanna talk to her. Really talk to her. Ask her questions that have been in my mind when I think of her. But even that simple wish cannot be granted because of the status that I have.
I am Robert James Reid. The big winner. The man that is chased by thousands of fan girls who claim to love him. The man who owes so much to his fans so he would do anything to make them happy. And sadly, Devon is out of the picture. They didn’t want us to be together for some reasons I find it hard to accept.
But I am not losing hope. One day, when this whole charade ends, I will chase her again and settle things with her. Then I will ask her to be my girl. If I am lucky enough to be chosen to be by her side on that day, I swear to God not to make her cry.
I will patiently wait for that day.
BEHIND THE SMILES
It was another though day. Today is finals week so I, together with my college friends have been stressful these days. Aside from that, I have to consider my rehearsals in ASAP. Unlike my PBB friends, I am not so seen in TV since I chose to have a full load in school. I have to do it for my family. Showbiz is not permanent. Aside from that, a lot of people didn’t like me when I was in PBB.
It hurts, I admit. I can’t understand their reasons for hating me so much. Up until now, they still brag the issues I have with Tricia when it’s now over. Tricia and I are not close, but we became friends. In fact, there were times that she stood up for me. There’s also the issue with James. I can’t believe that I am branded as a flirt because I became too close to him.
But I am Devon. I am bubbly. I am cheerful. I can’t allow someone to see that I am weak. Especially my family. If they see me breakdown, they will surely worry about me. And that is the least thing that I want to happen. So for them, I have to smile.
HAIRTIE
“Hi, Devon!” Ivan greeted me. I waved him as a sign of my greeting. I knew I looked like a mess. I literally ran my way here on the rehearsal area for the tough ten dance number in ASAP.
“Stuck at traffic again?” Tricia teasingly asked me and I nodded, still catching my breath. It still amazed me how I like Tricia now. She is such a sweet girl.
“Where are the others?” I asked. I noticed that aside from the three of us, the room was empty.
“Well, they said they’re hungry so they grab something to eat,” Ivan answered. I just shrugged and bring out my laptop. I have many things to accomplish. I am so occupied with school now. In fact, dance rehearsals and ASAP appearances are the only bonding moments I have with these guys.
“Hey, Devon’s now here.” Bret said after their not so quiet entrance. I just looked up at him at nod boyishly. I really have to finish this crap so I can join these people.
“And she’s not with us again.” I heard someone commented. It was Ivan.
“Sorry guys! I’ll join you later!” I assured them, but my eyes are still in the screen of my laptop. Then I fixed my hair. It is irritating me. I am a TV personality so if I can’t look good, I have to be at least presentable. But I know I look like Sadako now.
Then I saw a hand holding a hair tie. I look at him and I saw James smiling at me.
“I think you need this,” he said smiling that I can’t help but smile back. I miss this dude smiling at me like that. We rarely see each other these days. He is busy with his TV program.
“Thanks.”
“But you have to give it back to me later.”
“Well, as far as I remember, it was mine,” I said to him. I knew that was the hair tie I gave him months ago.
“It was yours. But now, it is mine.”
I was stunned by the possessiveness in his voice. Then I looked at him intently. The smile is gone and there is something in his eyes that made my heart skip a beat.
“Guys! Can we now practice?” That voice made me not focus on James. That was our choreographer. We gave an enthusiastic “yeah!” and went to the positions given to us.
PIGGY BACK RIDES
She is the reason why my life has found its new meaning.
She is the sunshine that gives light to the darkness in my heart.. the angel that led me back to where I should start and where I am supposed to go. She is my greatest treasure. She has this impact in my life yet she didn't have the slightest clue. As of now, she is my life. I will do everything to make her happy. My angel...
Unfortunately, I am not the man who can do this for her. I am just one of her friends that has the honor to tease her, to see her smile, to make her laugh... I can only watch. Watch her laugh hard to Lyan jokes, frown when Tatay Bret tease her, blush when I tease her to DD, cry silently when DD is with Toot...
Just like now...
"Momay," I called her name softly that she looked up abruptly. I was stunned to see her have tears in her lovely face though I expected it. She was always like this when she sees DD with her girlfriend...but when no one is around...
I can't bear the pain and confusion in her eyes so I pulled her closer and hold her tight.
"It's okay, kiddo," I said with so much agony. I can't stand it when she cries. I kissed her hair and she cried harder. It seems that the pain is too much for her to handle. Why does it have to be this angel? She doesn't deserve to experience pain...any pain for that matter. But I let her. I can only do this much. Sadly.
"I made your shirt wet, I'm sorry."
"No problem, Momay."
I can still see pain through her forced smile. If only she can transfer her agony to me, I will gladly accept it...
"Hey, Momay, wanna let me piggy back ride you?"
"Sure!" She smiled brightly I can't help but smile back.
"Aww, you're heavy!" I jokingly complained. She pulled my hair. "And you're getting violent again!"
She just laughed.
They say piggy back rides symbolize the willingness of the guy carrying the girl to pass the burdens and sufferings of the one he is carrying... If only piggy back rides can do that, I am willing to do it every moment she silently cries...
she is simple and bubbly
too far from perfection
yet she knows how
to say “i’m sorry”
he is mysterious and dazzling
a God’s gift to women
but he’s unhappy
and his eyes is full of longing
she grew up without anything
but she tried everything
he grew up with everything
he doesn’t need to do a thing
two different world from many
two different status of the cruel society
but both are searching
both are looking for something
and maybe it was meant to be
for them to meet
their first day was not good
and the following just get worse
and it’s still a mystery for us
when does it really started?
we just simply notice
the roller coaster ride romance they’re playing
and all of a sudden
she cared
he smiled
he’s sweet
she giggled hard
he stares
she laugh
and everything seems alright
then’ she would not talk
and he would look lost
she will be sweet with another guy
and he will hug the one syllable friend that he has
oh what if they knew that we are beginning to go psycho
will they stop their roller coaster ride romance
and build a tie that will put an end to all the other ship around?
THE LAST ONE STANDING
i saw you from a distance
feels like years since yesterday
you change a lot in just a snap
suddenly i lost track
from afar you look unhappy
and my tears began to fall
reminiscing makes it more unbearable
how i wish i could be more
i’m not mad or anything
it’s alright, i’m fine
i’ll try to lie
just to see you’re satisfied
with the path you chose to take
without me by your side
but if you fail
and you can’t bare the pain
just remember me
i’m the last one standing here
as i watch the captured memories that we shared
i wish for more
but as they say tomorrow is another day
and i need to move
i’m okay
i understand
it’s nothing
i’m fine
it’s so easy to lie
but you can’t see it in my eyes
i’ll try to laugh loud when you’re around
for you t think
it’s done
so you can finally shine
but when the limelight fade away
and all the shouts disappear one day
just look inside your heart
and you will see me
the last one standing there.
FOREVER HUG
goodbye is echoing from the outside
though i can see it
becoming clearer and brighter
i still don’t want to close my eyes
‘coz i am afraid that if i do
i would lose the one i’m hugging now
it is her presence that make me tremble
but i know her absence will make me tremble more
that is the reason why
i would like to buy the time
for it to stop at this very moment
me holding her tightly
while we are kissing gently
i don’t know but maybe i’m crazy
for feeling all the emotions
i don’t know if the real world
would be kind for the both of us
but one thing is for sure
i don’t want to end this hug
‘coz i don’t know if i could still carry on
this lifetime without her powerhug…
IF MY SONGS ARE NOT ENOUGH
If my songs are not enough
just let me stare at you for a minute or two
If my songs are not enough
just let me lay at your lap while smiling at you
If my songs are not enough
just let me be with you
If my songs are not enough
I really don’t know what to do
‘Coz you are the reason for all my melody
You are my inspiration to all the lyrics in me
I will never hear the music playing
If tomorrow is not for us to be with each other
arms just like this..
If my songs are not enough
just look at my eyes when i’m looking at you
If it’s not enough
look at me when i’m without you
If my songs are not enough
I really don’t know how to express it more
So baby listen to what i am singing
‘Coz it was all meant just for you
THERE IS SOMETHING
there is something about her
that makes me stare
there is something inside her
that makes me smile
i don’t know if
she knows it
but i hope she does
that there is something inside me
that wants to be just with her all day
there is a voice that gets louder
when she gets nearer
i don’t know if
she knows it
but i hope
she notice
that there is something
i’m feeling right now
and i’m afraid of it
and it’s squeezing my heart
and i can’t sleep
there are so many questions
lingering inside my mind
and my heart tells me
that only she can
answer it all
coz i can’t understand no more
all her signals and emotion
and if God will permit me
Just one question for her
i’ll ask her
“Is it okay for you to be my girl?"
UNTITLED ROMANCE
it was an ordinary start
no one really bother to ask
begins with a simple stare
with an additional smile in the end
no one thought they will be friends
and could build a world of their own
but sparks couldn’t be denied
and only blind can lie
though she would often be quiet when he’s around
he would be hyper just to caught her eyes
she would often change direction
but he would caught her in no time
their love story is not for them to tell
it’s for other people to noticed
it’s not to attract people
it’s for the both of them
it’s not to please others
it’s the truth and for real
though others may not recognized it
but there is an untitled romance
happening between known
just by the two of them.
Trailer: Epic From the creators of ICE AGE and RIO, EPIC tells the story of an ongoing battle between the forces of good, who keep the natural world alive, and the forces of evil, who wish to destroy it. view more
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