Will you take the job arranged by your parents?

Ice Burn · Jan 20, 2000, 09:56 PM

I have a problem which some of you might not think its a problem. My parents are well-to-do and travel in exalted circles. I have several job offers care of their intervention at big-time companies, but I deeply resent it. Parang I'll never get out of their meddling if I agree to it. The companies are to die for but I cannot stomach the idea that the only reason I am offered a job there is through the kompadrino system, meaning the boss of this company is a friend of my parents. I feel insulted as though I couldn't stand on my own two feet. What am I to do? If you were in my situation would you accept? I know I ought to feel grateful but isn't it time that I did this on my own?

Ira · Jan 20, 2000, 10:37 PM

In a parallel universe, it would be great to make it on your own, without your parents' help. However, our society being the way it is, you have to realise that, while you are trying to maintain your integrity, most of your peers aren't. If you won't get the job, chances are someone who pulled the same strings will. Don't cut off your nose to spite your face, 'ika nga. Accept the job, and just show them what you can do. While your parents may have opened doors, it is solely up to you to show the company that they were right in hiring you, after all.

***nix*** · Jan 21, 2000, 11:16 AM

Your parents just want the best for you, and there really isn't anything wrong with what they are doing. It's the opportunity to succeed that they are offering, but unless you work hard to exceed their expectations, that opportunity won't bring you success. That success will have to come from you.

Limerick · Jan 21, 2000, 02:05 PM

ask yourself first if you would really like to be in that job. if yes, and you perceive yourself deserving that post, then you'll be getting that post anyway, so take it. the sooner the better ika nga.

Yoshi · Jan 21, 2000, 06:29 PM

If you can really pull off getting a job on your own, then go ahead! It's always much more fulfilling that way. But take my word, it's very hard to look for a job nowadays! Just going through the job fair just made me realize how difficult it is to be unemployed.

ChiQui · Jan 21, 2000, 11:44 PM

I would. As long as it's the type of job that I really want and enjoy then why not?

BadGiRL · Jan 21, 2000, 11:53 PM

i would...pag salary ko triple...

seriously though, the best answer is-it depends. paano kung walang ka connect connect sa course mo yun? (some parents would arrange for jobs like that, yknow!)

Rockgardener · Jan 22, 2000, 05:09 AM

iceburn..i think you're just a little
bummed kasi you went to the job fair
the other day and found out the pickin's
were slim...now you feel doubly bummed
'cuz your parents are basically getting
you a job......am i right?..sorry in advance
if i'm off..but if you don't mind my humble
advice.. after graduation..PARTY, TRAVEL, AND LIVE YOUR YOUNG LIFE FIRST ! having to stand on your own two feet will come soon enough..but take the job too..if you can't find one that is..don't worry about being insulted.that's how it is when you come from the circle you come from..
looking a gift horse in the mouth, and forgetting how fortunate you are,.that might be an insult.
should you cut that umbilical chord though..
be cool..trust your instincts, and don't burn your bridges..especially your folks..
good luck dude..

Braveheart · Jan 22, 2000, 08:02 AM

dudette 'ata sya Rockgardener....

gwenni · Jan 23, 2000, 01:41 AM

You said that the jobs arranged are "to die for" -- does this mean that you like the jobs? Don't let your pride get in the way... If you really like the job offers, don't turn them down just because your parents have helped arrange for them. Ira's right, while your parents may have helped you get the job, it is still upto you to prove your worth. Getting the job is just the beginning, succeeding in it is the greater challenge... and this is something your parents can't claim credit for unless they do the job themselves, right? I understand your desire to stand on your own feet, but hey, you gotta start somewhere right? Don't take it too hard if you don't get a job by yourself -- it's not you, it's the system! There are just too many graduates and too few openings. What are your interests anyways? Perhaps, I can help you find a job... I know some companies with job openings... Hey, if you don't like the jobs your parents are offering you... I'm interested!

JK!

[This message has been edited by gwenni (edited 01-23-2000).]

***KuyaDanny*** · Jan 23, 2000, 04:34 PM

Sabi mo meron kang offers, as in hindi lang isa. Which means kailangan kang mamili.

Bago ka mamili, baka naman makakuha ka ng offer sa sariling sikap mo (walang palakasan), and it might turn out that these sariling sikap jobs are better than the palakasan ones. Then you work around the problem altogether, diba?

Ice Burn · Feb 1, 2000, 09:51 AM

Thanks guys...Right now, I'm thinking of going to East Timor to be a UN volunteer care of my parents again. Well, I suppose it would be a fellowship experience for me before I step put into the real world.

CaRaMBa · Feb 1, 2000, 05:40 PM

I would, if...
- I'm really interested in the position or in the company.
- I know I can make it.

I would think that it's more embarassing if I accept an offer which was arranged by my parents, but I knew I couldn't hack it, because it will show in my work. Your parents getting you a job is just the first step, you still have to prove yourself after that.

Just an advice, when you accept or reject an offer, make sure you're doing it for the right reasons. From what you're saying, it seems that you don't want to accept the offers because of the fact your parents got in the picture. Look at it from a different angle. Be thankful that you have the job offers, then analyze and weigh everything. Then accept or reject.

--
Just a comment, about "to-die-for" companies. Sometimes, it's really just all hype. I have already lost respect for some of these companies. For example, there's this big company, a lot of grads dream of working for this company, but aysus, you will not imagine how inefficient most of their employees are when they work. You'll know when you're working with them - sometimes you'll end up wondering like crazy why most graduates want to join them.
--


Jan 20, 2000, 09:56 PM	#1
Ice Burn Conflicting Karma Join Date: Dec 1999 Location: Rimakyr	I have a problem which some of you might not think its a problem. My parents are well-to-do and travel in exalted circles. I have several job offers care of their intervention at big-time companies, but I deeply resent it. Parang I'll never get out of their meddling if I agree to it. The companies are to die for but I cannot stomach the idea that the only reason I am offered a job there is through the kompadrino system, meaning the boss of this company is a friend of my parents. I feel insulted as though I couldn't stand on my own two feet. What am I to do? If you were in my situation would you accept? I know I ought to feel grateful but isn't it time that I did this on my own?


Jan 20, 2000, 10:37 PM	#2
Ira Member Join Date: Oct 1999	In a parallel universe, it would be great to make it on your own, without your parents' help. However, our society being the way it is, you have to realise that, while you are trying to maintain your integrity, most of your peers aren't. If you won't get the job, chances are someone who pulled the same strings will. Don't cut off your nose to spite your face, 'ika nga. Accept the job, and just show them what you can do. While your parents may have opened doors, it is solely up to you to show the company that they were right in hiring you, after all.


Jan 21, 2000, 11:16 AM	#3
*nix* Administrator Join Date: Jul 1999 Location: Metro_Manila	Your parents just want the best for you, and there really isn't anything wrong with what they are doing. It's the opportunity to succeed that they are offering, but unless you work hard to exceed their expectations, that opportunity won't bring you success. That success will have to come from you.


Jan 21, 2000, 02:05 PM	#4
Limerick wuv muffin! Join Date: Oct 1999 Location: Metro_Manila	ask yourself first if you would really like to be in that job. if yes, and you perceive yourself deserving that post, then you'll be getting that post anyway, so take it. the sooner the better ika nga.


Jan 21, 2000, 06:29 PM	#5
Yoshi Member Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: Metro_Manila	If you can really pull off getting a job on your own, then go ahead! It's always much more fulfilling that way. But take my word, it's very hard to look for a job nowadays! Just going through the job fair just made me realize how difficult it is to be unemployed.


Jan 21, 2000, 11:44 PM	#6
ChiQui Member Join Date: Jul 1999 Location: Metro_Manila	I would. As long as it's the type of job that I really want and enjoy then why not?


Jan 21, 2000, 11:53 PM	#7
BadGiRL procrastination specialist Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: boondocks	i would...pag salary ko triple... seriously though, the best answer is-it depends. paano kung walang ka connect connect sa course mo yun? (some parents would arrange for jobs like that, yknow!)


Jan 22, 2000, 05:09 AM	#8
Rockgardener Rockgardener Join Date: Jul 1999 Location: San Francisco	iceburn..i think you're just a little bummed kasi you went to the job fair the other day and found out the pickin's were slim...now you feel doubly bummed 'cuz your parents are basically getting you a job......am i right?..sorry in advance if i'm off..but if you don't mind my humble advice.. after graduation..PARTY, TRAVEL, AND LIVE YOUR YOUNG LIFE FIRST ! having to stand on your own two feet will come soon enough..but take the job too..if you can't find one that is..don't worry about being insulted.that's how it is when you come from the circle you come from.. looking a gift horse in the mouth, and forgetting how fortunate you are,.that might be an insult. should you cut that umbilical chord though.. be cool..trust your instincts, and don't burn your bridges..especially your folks.. good luck dude..


Jan 22, 2000, 08:02 AM	#9
Braveheart Banned by Admin Join Date: Oct 1999 Location: paranaque city	dudette 'ata sya Rockgardener....


Jan 23, 2000, 01:41 AM	#10
gwenni Member Join Date: Oct 1999	You said that the jobs arranged are "to die for" -- does this mean that you like the jobs? Don't let your pride get in the way... If you really like the job offers, don't turn them down just because your parents have helped arrange for them. Ira's right, while your parents may have helped you get the job, it is still upto you to prove your worth. Getting the job is just the beginning, succeeding in it is the greater challenge... and this is something your parents can't claim credit for unless they do the job themselves, right? I understand your desire to stand on your own feet, but hey, you gotta start somewhere right? Don't take it too hard if you don't get a job by yourself -- it's not you, it's the system! There are just too many graduates and too few openings. What are your interests anyways? Perhaps, I can help you find a job... I know some companies with job openings... Hey, if you don't like the jobs your parents are offering you... I'm interested! JK! [This message has been edited by gwenni (edited 01-23-2000).]


Jan 23, 2000, 04:34 PM	#11
*KuyaDanny* Moderator Join Date: Jan 2000 Location: Makati	Sabi mo meron kang offers, as in hindi lang isa. Which means kailangan kang mamili. Bago ka mamili, baka naman makakuha ka ng offer sa sariling sikap mo (walang palakasan), and it might turn out that these sariling sikap jobs are better than the palakasan ones. Then you work around the problem altogether, diba?


Feb 1, 2000, 09:51 AM	#12
Ice Burn Conflicting Karma Join Date: Dec 1999 Location: Rimakyr	Thanks guys...Right now, I'm thinking of going to East Timor to be a UN volunteer care of my parents again. Well, I suppose it would be a fellowship experience for me before I step put into the real world.


Feb 1, 2000, 05:40 PM	#13
CaRaMBa PEx Consultant Join Date: Sep 1999 Location: happytripper.com	I would, if... - I'm really interested in the position or in the company. - I know I can make it. I would think that it's more embarassing if I accept an offer which was arranged by my parents, but I knew I couldn't hack it, because it will show in my work. Your parents getting you a job is just the first step, you still have to prove yourself after that. Just an advice, when you accept or reject an offer, make sure you're doing it for the right reasons. From what you're saying, it seems that you don't want to accept the offers because of the fact your parents got in the picture. Look at it from a different angle. Be thankful that you have the job offers, then analyze and weigh everything. Then accept or reject. -- Just a comment, about "to-die-for" companies. Sometimes, it's really just all hype. I have already lost respect for some of these companies. For example, there's this big company, a lot of grads dream of working for this company, but aysus, you will not imagine how inefficient most of their employees are when they work. You'll know when you're working with them - sometimes you'll end up wondering like crazy why most graduates want to join them. --